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Is listing to love song as a aroace strange?


Guest Anonymous

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Guest Anonymous

I identify as arorace, but I enjoy wearing lingerie and listening to love songs. I have had intense squishes in the past, and currently, I have this one friend of mine who does not identify as Aro ace, but I do like the physical affection I get from them; I enjoy the proximity we share and most of the time, I am the one who is initiating it, we do not kiss and other things but we get cozy, hold hands and stuff like that I think they might have a bit of crush on me, what should I do? I am pretty sure I am aroace. I have been proudly wearing that label for four years now. But sometimes, I feel like an imposter. 

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If it’s strange I don’t want to be normal. Love songs slap. I can’t relate to the other stuff personally but they sound cool to me. Do what makes you happy. None of it invalidates your aro experience.

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You’re certainly not an imposter. Love songs are basically EVERYWHERE. Even us aros can’t escape them. A lot of love songs do be hittin’ so of course you can like them. You can like fairly romantic things and still be aromantic. Aromantic just means you don’t experience romantic attraction. Not every thing is cut and dry or black and white. There is a lot of gray area that most of us ace/aros fall under. We don’t all have to act a certain way to fit into our own community. You should probably tell your friend that your ace/aro though, so they don’t feel led on.

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Some love songs are certified bangers, and there’s nothing strange about listening to good music. As for the lingerie thing, I’m an allosexual who hates dressing sexy, so I don’t think that kind of thing has any bearing on your sexuality/makes you an imposter. 

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Guest Anonymous

@Neon @tiger_hoods12 @An Aro Passes Bi Thank you so much for making me feel comfortable and not alone. It means a lot.@tiger_hoods12 My friends know about my identity and are okay with it. I still think they might have a crush on me, but I don't know how to help them. Sometimes, I feel like I might be leading them on.

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You should ask them how they feel. Sometimes people can act romantic towards people without meaning it. Even allos act like that. They might have a crush on you and they may not. I think you should just be honest and tell them how you feel and what you’re comfortable with in the friendship you have.

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20 hours ago, Guest Anonymous said:

I identify as arorace, but I enjoy wearing lingerie and listening to love songs. I have had intense squishes in the past, and currently, I have this one friend of mine who does not identify as Aro ace, but I do like the physical affection I get from them; I enjoy the proximity we share and most of the time, I am the one who is initiating it, we do not kiss and other things but we get cozy, hold hands and stuff like that I think they might have a bit of crush on me, what should I do? I am pretty sure I am aroace. I have been proudly wearing that label for four years now. But sometimes, I feel like an imposter. 

this is perfectly normal

also lingerie is literally just comfortable undergarments, not exclusively a allo thing

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Its okay to like this songs! I personally LOVE romance in fiction, which led me to really find it hard to undertand myself in the aro umbrella. One thing is enjoying something around the subject of "romance" and ANOTHER is to actually partake in it. I love a good romance story, but that doesn't mean i want that. Like: I like action movies, but thay dosent mean I want to learn how to fighr or handle a gun. Is a story, fiction. And the same thing is with songs. 

 

Also, aside from the worry you have about this person having a crush woth you, you are describing what I WANT! like, is not the same sexual and SENSUAL attraction. You like to cuddle, feel emotionally and physically close to this person, but the sexual or romantic want. This is enough for you, you are comfortable with this and you don't want more, as is VALID,but you mught need to talk with thos person to avoid further issues in your friendship. 

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