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Coming out stories!

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Alright I got a silly one

 

So one of my friends has a birthday less than a week before mine, and last time since it wasn’t over spring break we decided to have a joint birthday party. Afterward we hung out just the two of us and she thought it’d be fun to do my birth chart. I’m an Aries, although I don’t really pay that kind of stuff any mind. So when she started reading about what my Venus was (that’s the love/sex one, also in Aries for me), and it talked about how flirty, romantic, and saucy I’m supposed to be, I just started laughing hysterically. 

 

She was like “oh hey, I don’t think you ever mentioned to me what your orientation is” and when I was like I’m aro/ace lmao, she started losing it too and we were both howling as she tried to read the rest of it

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I’m out to one friend as asexual.

 

Recently we were talking and he said he was mad at a lot of his friends because they were leaving him out a lot. I commented that I’m scared nobody will have time for me anymore in a few years because everyone will start dating. 

 

He said, “I don’t really know much about asexuality, but you don’t have to be sexually attracted to someone to date.”

I told him that’s true, and explained about romantic orientations and how they’re different from sexual orientations. I said that just like he’s biromantic and bisexual, I’m aromantic and asexual. 

 

He said, “Oh, that makes sense. So basically I’m just really horny and you’re just not horny at all.”

 

That’s one way to put it, I suppose. 😂

 

 

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I came out to a few people so far as grey-aro with ok results

 

Some old friends: “that’ll probably maybe change, you’re still young” and “You just didn’t meet the one yet” bullshit. 

They were accepting I guess but they didn’t really understand it.

 

(Not) surprisingly? the friends I met relatively recently have been better about it and more accepting/understanding.

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I did not come out directly but asked my parents today: "What if I want to share my life with five girls and six boys, like a hippie?"
(it is a delighting vision for me to live together with several people and be affectionate with each other but without all the romantic stuff).
My mother simply answered, with a smile: "It's your life". Always the best answer.
Perviously, my dad came home and told us an old friend of him implied he wanted to set me off with his son (I don't know either of them, lmao).
My mom replied immediately: "Why, is he gay?"
My gender identity is finally recognized and accepted as well 😎.

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I've come out to one person. It was my friend at school, who is non-binary (fine with female pronouns) and poly. About a week ago, we were messaging over Pinterest in class. At some point, she says "*SCREAMS IN GAY*" (she says that pretty often). I said, "*SCREAMS IN ARO/ACE*". I didn't really know what to expect, but she just laughed. It was great though.

 

I want to come out to my two closest friends, one of whom is also asexual, but the other is straight and I don't want her to feel like she can't talk to me about those things. But I know I can't pretend to be something I'm not, so I plan to come out to them soon. :)

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I had this moment where I was preparing for a French speaking exam, and I said "Je suis celibataire. Je n'ai pa une petite amie ou un petit ami." and my mum kind of cocked her head and went, "une petite amie ou un petit ami, ay?" and I shrugged. So I'm pretty sure she knows I at least fancy both guys and girls now, but I'm waiting until I'm in a relationship to bother to come out, since it isn't a major part of my identity... I'll just be like "Yep, this is Brian." or "Yep, this is Brie." Or, "Yep, this is... what's your name again? What are you doing in my house?" 

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On National Coming Out Day last year I posted on my close friends story on Instagram about how I was aromantic. I also posted a "you might be aromantic if" post and mentioned how I related to a lot of the stuff it said, and how it made me happy to identify this way. All of my friends, though a little confused, were very supportive. One of my friends is a little more disbelieving (I'm sure more than one are but this friend is the only one that voices it sometimes) and every once in a while she asks me if I'm still identifying this way and if I might change. She's a good friend and well-meaning but it's annoying sometimes.

I had already come out to 2 of my friends, one of whom is aro-spec, and they were both super supportive and they helped me figure myself out. It later turned out that two more of my friends came out as ace and demi, respectively, and it was just super cool to have an a-spec gang like that. 

One of my friends also got me a tiny little aro pin on the first day of pride month last june! It's very cute and I love it so much.

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I came out to my friend as gray aro and they were just like “that seems like a sad life. To not have anyone” and I was just like “eh it’s pretty great not to stress over dating” she just gave me a look like I was crazy but like in a jokingly way. She supports me to this day.

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Guest Alex

When I came out at first, it was to my art table, and was far from how I planned to come out. Some of my tablemates were saying that someone who sat at my table, who happened to be absent that day, had a crush on me. When they said that, I had gotten the words asexual and aromantic mixed up, at the time not even knowing aromanicism was a thing,and used the definition improperly. My table corrected me.

The second time was to my sister.She and I were taking the dogs out and I managed to make her taunt me about a crush. I had been taunted about it before. Anyway, when she did, I said something like have fun saying that to the aro ace girl. A night later she came out to me as pan.

The third time I came out to my parents. I had written aro ❤️ace  on my hand. My dad noticed it at dinner and asked what it was. I told him aromantic and asexual. He seemed skeptical about me being aro and ace, and I still think he is now. 

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I had revealed I had a crush on the robotics team to my mom and she kept saying all the females so I said "Its sweet you still think I'm straight."...4 hours later, took quite the nerve to say it for some reason(this was back when I thought I was homoromantic).

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Guest tired

ok, a few months ago i had told my mom that I never wanted to get married.  she got very mad at me for saying that and yelled at me a lot.  shes pretty religious and thinks that every girl needs some dude in their life to be happy.  she also thinks that LGBTQ+ people can just "not".  like it's some choice they made and can grow out of/be not that way.

later, when I learned the term aromantic, I decided to bring it up in a conversation.  my mom quickly said that "those people are just in denial"

stupid that she can't get it

my friends were much more supportive of me. they are very accepting of the LGBTQ+ community and many of them are in it aswell.  I brought up that I was aro and Ace and they were just like, "yeah, we pretty much knew"

also helps that one of my friends is ace too

my dad was pretty chill about it when I told him, but he still thinks I'll find somebody someday. 🙄

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So, last October on National Coming Out day

I stopped my mom as she was on her way to take a bath and showed her the aromantic flag hanging in my room. I said "this is the flag for people who aren't attracted to anyone". Her initial response was one of irritation, as she said "don't buy into that crap". Knowing she wouldn't accept a label, I continued to explain that I'm not attracted to anyone, and she accepted that. She did ask if I was gay, and I said no (I'm bi-leaning, but she doesn't need to know that). Since I'm in the grey area, I also left some room for possible future attraction by saying that I may experience attraction one day.
So overall it went good.

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