Rinpochard Posted May 13, 2023 Share Posted May 13, 2023 I feel kinda blank right now. Idk how to explain it. My friend broke up with their partner and idk how to comfort them. I'm excited for summer and I'm going to enjoy it so damn much but it feels distant. My future studies with chemistry and biology are also causing me pressure. What if I fail my courses? What if my issues come back worse than before? I've also started doubting my aroness. I have been planning how to come out to my parents on my birthday but idk if it's worth it. I don't know if they care. I know they'd use it against me, like they use my issues against me to call me lazy and "just a moody teenager". I really want aro and ace pins for my backpack when I start high school (note: we start it later than in the USA, I'm not 14) as way of expressing myself more because I don't really do that due to past experiences, but can't get them. I don't really know what to do right now. I might just delete this later Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelloThere Posted May 13, 2023 Share Posted May 13, 2023 1 hour ago, Rinpochard said: I feel kinda blank right now. Idk how to explain it. My friend broke up with their partner and idk how to comfort them. I'm excited for summer and I'm going to enjoy it so damn much but it feels distant. My future studies with chemistry and biology are also causing me pressure. What if I fail my courses? What if my issues come back worse than before? I've also started doubting my aroness. I have been planning how to come out to my parents on my birthday but idk if it's worth it. I don't know if they care. I know they'd use it against me, like they use my issues against me to call me lazy and "just a moody teenager". I really want aro and ace pins for my backpack when I start high school (note: we start it later than in the USA, I'm not 14) as way of expressing myself more because I don't really do that due to past experiences, but can't get them. I don't really know what to do right now. I might just delete this later I can feel ya, I don’t really know what my future holds and I’m scared about it. I’m scared that I’ll be wrong about being aroace and then I’ll feel stupid later on. I’m scared that this may really be “just a phase” (I haven’t told them I’m aroace, just that I don’t want to marry or have kids) and that my parents will be right and then amatanormativity will just be that much stronger in them. I’m scared about the possibility that if I am aroace, then I don’t know how I’ll have relationships in the future, after all I’m only going to live in the place I’m at for 1.5 more years and I just can’t make any solid friendships that last. I’m worried that all my interests won’t pan out or won’t be strong enough for me to make it a career. Overall, I’m either scared or I’m feeling blank. I can feel you and I’ve been there. There’s not much of a way to be sure but I guess my advice is that when you feel down about something, address it with an understanding mindset. Your parents for all you know might be thrilled you trusted them enough, they may dismiss it but when you tell them their opinions will begin to morph overtime. When you tell them they will almost always become more accepting of you as time passes. Other than that, I have no idea what to say but I guess, enjoy high school! :D (I’m in freshman year and it’s tiring but it’s not horrible, just prepare to get used to homework. 🤷♂️) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwiftySpeedy Posted May 14, 2023 Share Posted May 14, 2023 3 hours ago, HelloThere said: I can feel ya, I don’t really know what my future holds and I’m scared about it. I’m scared that I’ll be wrong about being aroace and then I’ll feel stupid later on. I’m scared that this may really be “just a phase” (I haven’t told them I’m aroace, just that I don’t want to marry or have kids) and that my parents will be right and then amatanormativity will just be that much stronger in them. I’m scared about the possibility that if I am aroace, then I don’t know how I’ll have relationships in the future, after all I’m only going to live in the place I’m at for 1.5 more years and I just can’t make any solid friendships that last. I’m worried that all my interests won’t pan out or won’t be strong enough for me to make it a career. Overall, I’m either scared or I’m feeling blank. I can feel you and I’ve been there. There’s not much of a way to be sure but I guess my advice is that when you feel down about something, address it with an understanding mindset. Your parents for all you know might be thrilled you trusted them enough, they may dismiss it but when you tell them their opinions will begin to morph overtime. When you tell them they will almost always become more accepting of you as time passes. Other than that, I have no idea what to say but I guess, enjoy high school! :D (I’m in freshman year and it’s tiring but it’s not horrible, just prepare to get used to homework. 🤷♂️) Well Number one if you're worried about Aroace being a phase that's probably because people have told you or you have heard stories of people being told that. Aroace being a phase is just a myth and is not real and if it turned out it was a phase you would not even worry about it so much. Number two you don't need to have a career If you are aroace you're probably going to live by yourself for the rest of your life. So, if you get a job similar to what your parents have, you will actually have a large amount of disposable income since you don't need to pay for anyone else and if the income is smaller living alone will make the bills much more smaller. hope that made you feel better.🙂 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelloThere Posted May 14, 2023 Share Posted May 14, 2023 9 minutes ago, SwiftySpeedy said: Well Number one if you're worried about Aroace being a phase that's probably because people have told you or you have heard stories of people being told that. Aroace being a phase is just a myth and is not real and if it turned out it was a phase you would not even worry about it so much. Number two you don't need to have a career If you are aroace you're probably going to live by yourself for the rest of your life. So, if you get a job similar to what your parents have, you will actually have a large amount of disposable income since you don't need to pay for anyone else and if the income is smaller living alone will make the bills much more smaller. hope that made you feel better.🙂 Yeah I guess I had worded it wrong, I’m afraid of being wrong about the whole situation and having to take all that personal progress and ride it all back. I mean I don’t want to live by myself, I’m rather extroverted I just don’t want a married relationship or to have kids, they just don’t interest me and I’d probably have a hard time getting behind it. I’d either want a qpr or a friend who I live with. I mean yeah there’s economic benefits to living alone but I also like socializing so how could that work without me having a panic attack? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwiftySpeedy Posted May 14, 2023 Share Posted May 14, 2023 maybe its just that i have more of a intoverted mindset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HelloThere Posted May 14, 2023 Share Posted May 14, 2023 9 hours ago, SwiftySpeedy said: maybe its just that i have more of a intoverted mindset. Yeah sorry, I’m very extroverted but I’m kinda fine with being alone most of the time, I just need to meet people occasionally and that’d help a lot. XD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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