It’s odd to me how allos rate their physical bodies on a scale from 1-10 and have...leagues...

[Ikarus]

Have you ever heard an allo person say, that person is way out of my league or, he/she is a 5 or a 3 or a 9.5 in the looks department? What I find the most odd is how important looks seem to be in romantic pursuits, I made another post a while back about lookism which explains this connection a little. Lookism is basically the bias that attractive people tend to have good personality, financially stable, healthy, morally superior etc. 

As an aromantic, the way I find relationships seems so very different from allos, but I think lookism is a big reason for this difference. The bias of lookism takes effect on everyone to some degree, but this bias is particularly strange in romantic activities. It seems to me that allos use leagues and number rating looks as a scoring metric used to determine the probability of romance or sex with a certain person. If a guy is 6 in the looks department and the woman he wants to attract is a 9.5 then he will probably have to compensate this looks gap with personality, charisma, financial security etc. How about a woman who is judged to be about a 3 in looks, she will probably have to try the same strategies, personality, making money, sense of humor. Although it would be very hard for her to find someone “out of here league” being at a 7 or 8.

Lookism can be so important that allos stay in relationships with people based solely on looks. You have a guy for instance who begins a relationship with a very attractive woman, she is amazing in the bedroom and has a very pretty face. "She" was drop dead gorgeous, then she started talking. The woman has a very entitled and narcissistic personality, and she is a complete bag for conversations. Despite this many men are very willing to stay in this type of relationship for who knows how long, it depends. 

I think lookism also keeps like bodied people together, for example you often see chubby people with chubby people, skinny people with skinny people, tall people, less attractive people with less attractive people. It seems that lookism and leagues often determines the type of people allo people marry or engage romantically with. A less attractive nerdy guy for instance is rarely with a 9.5 woman, but if he is rich then maybe not. A woman who is a 4 is rarely ever married to a Chad. I imagine a lot of allos would tell that Chad, hey you can do better than that, look at these 9.5 / 10 woman. At the very least lookism and leagues seem to be a very important qualification before getting to know one another. Often times relationships have problems even starting if allos are in different leagues from each other. Lookism and leagues is at the very least, in my opinion the most important first hoop to jump through for allos. 

Could you imagine though someone approaching you and your friend and saying this. Hey, your a Chad man, you don’t have to settle for a 5 girl like this, come on man you gotta enter the big leagues man. What utter absolute cringe that would be my God! 

Anyway, that is all I have to say, hope you found this interesting to some degree.

 

 

 

[roboticanary]

I don't think anyone I know ever did the rating out of 10 thing. Like we'd call some people hot, and acknowledge some people were hotter than others but never did the rating out of 10.

Whenever I heard about it it always seemed like a joke. The guy who has a detailed rating system for how hot each girl he sees is but doesn't realise they would all rate him as 1 sort of thing.

maybe my people were just more base in their comments. I distinctly remember a guy in my class asking me who I thought had the biggest tits and he got really annoyed when I jokingly said 'me'.

[alto]

My first date was extremely fat, and when I broke up with her my Stepdad told me I could "do better".  That confused me a bit, and I was a bit insulted too.

[Neon]

In real life I've only seen the scale used three ways: misogynistically (gross), jokingly (still weird), or to body shame someone (also gross). As far as I know it originated as being misogynistic.

[Deltalorian]

Back when I had my only crush, I had told my friend that I had asked her out and the first words out of his mouth were "she's way out of your league, dude" like wtf? Not only was she perfectly happy to date me, as far as I know, he had only spoken to her once. Why would you say that right out of the gate?

[Holmbo]

I've never heard anyone use numbers to rate someones look in real life. But it does seem like it happens from time to time irl, not just in pop culture.

It is interesting how sexual attraction goes together with aesthetic but like you say people don't care about it as much in other kinds of relationships. But I do think it still has some effect. It's probably easier for someone good looking to make friends. 

[DeltaAro]

2 hours ago, Holmbo said:

I've never heard anyone use numbers to rate someones look in real life.

I did, quite a few times. It belongs to the "hiding behind satire to spew a barrage of obnoxious 'jokes'" category.

[ilse]

It all ties in with misogyny tbh, there wouldn't be so many "type of girlfriend" memes if it were otherwise 🤷‍♀️

[boba]

I know people who use numbers, but they (and their audience) completely understands that "attractiveness" is subjective. And it's not ever used seriously, still a lil weird though.

Leagues are definitely weird. Because like, what are the factors in that? How many factors are you using? Are these specific factors standardised (no, bc no one knows what "league" actually means, and even if u did have factors i.e attractiveness/personality/etc. it's still all subjective) ?