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Invalidation, on a global scale.


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Okay. I'd like to start by saying I know this has the potential to upset people, but it's an issue I've been thinking a lot about, so I thought maybe we could all have a discussion about it. I will also say that respecting each other's views, while agreeing to disagree is very important in achieving that, so I'll only say this once: if you're not sure you can do that, please hit the back button now. I'd also like to take the time to caution you that some of what I am about to say is very bluntly stated. If that bothers you in any way, you may not want to read any further. You have been warned. 

 

That being said, I'll get to the point: There is a difference between wanting others to empathize with you, and wanting them to feel sorry for you.

 

There's nothing wrong with reaching out to each other; with coming together in communities and circles to discuss the problems going on in your life, or the things happening to you that have/had scarred you. That's why most of us are here. To relate, and empathize with each other. It's not good to keep it bottled up inside. But as I said, there is a difference between wanting people to empathize with your feelings, and wanting others to feel sorry for you, and unfortunately, I have begun to see a disturbing number of the former. I'm not saying here, just everywhere I turn, internet and real life alike. All of a sudden instead of empathizing with each other, I'm seeing people making a pissing match out of it, trying to decide who deserves validation more based upon who has it "worse." Both inside, and outside of the LGBT+ community. Quite frankly, I find it repulsive, and very childish. Suffering is not a competition. Honestly, if people spent as much time sharing with each other as they do invalidating them, we wouldn't have millions of people thinking everything is all about them, because their lives are 'worse.' Yeah, boo hoo, prince(ss). I don't give a flying shit what your problems are, they don't give you an excuse to treat people like crap.

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It is an interesting situation, and very cleverly set up. I think of it like the hunger games, so long as the oppressed and the minorities are fighting each other in an arena we can;t group up and be a real danger to the oppressors. It always confuses me how the same fight has to be fought for each new group to get rights and acceptance, when we have been here before so many times. I agree it isn;t a compertition, but sometimes it can be hard to remember who the real enemy is

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