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My name is Miranda, I'm 41 years of age, I have 2 kids, I'm a nurse and I live in the Netherlands. Besides having aspergers, and thus being an introvert, having no friends and my love life has been.....ehm....strange. As a teenager I experienced a lot of crushes, they lasted only weeks. I married my best friend back in the 90's, had 2 kids with him, and the romantic and sexual feelings lasted maybe a year or so, but little did I know, so I practically faked it for 8 years, then I couldn't anymore. Since then, my relationships where few, I can fall in love, but all the feels vanish in about a few weeks to a few months, the feeling of being in love so much that you miss ypur s.o. all day and would die for them....never ever experienced that. My sexual feelings spike for a few weeks before they disappear.

I live alone with my son now for 3 years and am single for almost 2 years. The thought of someone living with me and lying in my bed and wanting things and so on freak me out. So, at 41, after some soul-searching, questioning my sexuality and some good googling, I was today years old when I found out  I am an aroacespike. Or I feel aroacespike. How do I say that?

 

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Hallo, Miranda! Exciting to meet an aroace-spectrum person who also lives in the Netherlands. I'm glad that you were able to find a label that feels right to you. I think most people would say "I am [label/identity]" but if you like to say "I feel aroacespike" that's fine as well :) Anyway, welcome to the community, I hope you have a nice time around here! 

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I do! Sometimes it feels like there are barely any aros in the Netherlands (or that it's not as visible here). 

4 hours ago, Aspienurse said:

Let me rephrase : I'm a cis woman, pansexual aroacespike. Is this alright? 😂😂 

Yeah, that's alright, you can say it like that! You could also say "I'm a pansexual aroacespike cis woman" :) Either way gets it across though.

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