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DannyFenton123

Aromantic Moments

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Tfw your extremely straight not-very-close friend is better at picking up on how uncomfortable you get when people kiss in front of you than the couple of fairly close friends, both of which are generally more educated about aromanticism, whom you literally live with >.<

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On 24.8.2016 at 8:28 AM, Quinoa said:

You're right. But this was about celebrity crushes, who are unlikely to be your friends anyway. Also, I was about 12 at the time and not experienced with what tends to happen when friends get into relationships. 

 

What the hell is a celebrity crush?! I'm a huge HIM fan and when I was young everybody thought I had a crush on Ville. Like no? I don't have romantic fantasies? I just wanna talk with him about poetry and our favourite writers :D

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So I was chatting with a friend on discord and this happens:

 

Friend: Hey did you hear that [guy we play overwatch with regularly] got interviewed by Kotaku?

Me: No. Is he working on a new game or something? (This guy is a freelance video game writer and has worked on games such as Starbound in the past)

Friend: Sends me a link.

Me: Looks at link. Facepalms at the title. Cringes after reading the first sentence. WHY!?!?!?!?!?

 

If you can't be bothered looking at the link it's about a fan game of overwatch called, "Loverwatch" and it's a dating sim with the characters of overwatch. :facepalm: I can't believe this is a thing.

 

 

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That moment when you realize that you've been roped into giving people relationship advice every day for the past three days even though you're the literal least qualified person on the planet for that and you just kind of sit there for about 5 minutes, staring at a wall in disbelief and wondering how on Earth your life came to this. 

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(I'm going to just pretend this isn't a double post because this thread hasn't been active for a month) 

 

So I just watched The Blind Banker (Sherlock S1E2) with a friend who's also possibly somewhere on the aro spectrum (quoi? demi? Neither of us are really sure), and when it got to the point where

 John and his attempted girlfriend both got kidnapped because plot reasons and the latter was about to be dramatically killed by the organized crime ring in order to get information out of the former 

, both of us immediately agreed that the entire situation could have been avoided if he had just been aroace and therefore precluded the possibility of a random shoehorned excuse for a romantic subplot that only existed for dramatic tension and plot convenience. 

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Last night I had a dream that for some reason I was supposed to be in the wedding party of some random people, which I had absolutely no interest in, but then I found out that my role in the wedding party was to be the person taking care of the couple's incredibly tiny adorable kitten during the ceremony, and then I was totally fine with it because kitten!

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4 minutes ago, Dodecahedron314 said:

Last night I had a dream that for some reason I was supposed to be in the wedding party of some random people, which I had absolutely no interest in, but then I found out that my role in the wedding party was to be the person taking care of the couple's incredibly tiny adorable kitten during the ceremony, and then I was totally fine with it because kitten!

KITTY!

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when you subconsciously keep looking up as a certain person keeps walking past you, and then because you're looking at them often they start looking your way frequently, and you're worried you've accidentally initiated eye-flirts with someone, so make sure to not look up when they pass, and after a few times they stop paying any attention to you whatsoever. phew!

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So I saw a bunch of videos about how (some certain particular individual) women really dislike compliments (not even passive aggressive snyde remarks but stuff like you've lost weight or you're wearing a nice dress) and I'm glad the strive for romance won't be a reason for getting into that sticky situation. A lot of it has to do with trouble in the past and people being unaware of that when complimenting and I don't see how one avoids that. So yeah people scare me.

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4 minutes ago, Louis Hypo said:

So I saw a bunch of videos about how (some certain particular individual) women really dislike compliments (not even passive aggressive snyde remarks but stuff like you've lost weight or you're wearing a nice dress) and I'm glad the strive for romance won't be a reason for getting into that sticky situation. A lot of it has to do with trouble in the past and people being unaware of that when complimenting and I don't see how one avoids that. So yeah people scare me.

Yeah...social situations can be flummoxing. I get why "you've lost weight" can be uncomfortable-- if it's a compliment, that implies that she was fat before. I mean, I've been the recipient of that one from my grandma and I was pretty awkward. Yeah, I knew I was overweight before, grams, thanks for pointing it out :P

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6 minutes ago, shotinthehand said:

Yeah...social situations can be flummoxing. I get why "you've lost weight" can be uncomfortable-- if it's a compliment, that implies that she was fat before. I mean, I've been the recipient of that one from my grandma and I was pretty awkward. Yeah, I knew I was overweight before, grams, thanks for pointing it out :P

OK. I was told that by my grandmother when I was 13 but it was in relation to my existential growth (she said I'd slimmed out) that has made me the tallest in my extended family. Also I support body positivity unless there's a health problem (I don't want to get into that though) so if your weight is in the good middle ground maybe it's a case of tough love? (I'm not an expert idk)

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receiving compliments usually just leaves me feeling self-conscious and guilty. 

 

unless there's obvious practical reasons for it, like "there that was a good right turn, try to do that more often and you've got it down pat"

or if it's from a close friend or squish :$ although even then, excessive flattery starts to annoy me and feel too intimate. 

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21 minutes ago, cute kitty Meow! Mewo! said:

excessive flattery starts to annoy me and feel too intimate

Or gets creepy depending on the thing.

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10 hours ago, cute kitty Meow! Mewo! said:

receiving compliments usually just leaves me feeling self-conscious and guilty. 

 

unless there's obvious practical reasons for it, like "there that was a good right turn, try to do that more often and you've got it down pat"

or if it's from a close friend or squish :$ although even then, excessive flattery starts to annoy me and feel too intimate. 

I'm really awkward about compliments, unless it's from my squish then I'm extremely flattered :arolove:

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On 4/3/2016 at 11:13 AM, DannyFenton123 said:

Also, I find it annoying when I talk about shows I like and people immediately go to shipping. There's not an inherent problem with that and I know a lot of people like to do that, but there's a lot more to stuff than who likes who :ph34r:

EXACTLY! There's more to a series than shipping! :nopapo:

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Yesterday in a tutor session there was a really short quiz that was a knockoff of the Myers-Briggs personality test (the questions were so obvious as to what they were trying to find which just doesn't work as well as asking how you'd act in situations) and in the description at the start is mentioned "what kind of a boyfriend or girlfriend you are," to which I muttered under my breath "oh I'm a neither-friend," and when the person next to me noticed I just pretended to have said nothing because I only see these people once a week and cannot be arsed to explain 'my alien condition' to him.

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On 5/21/2016 at 2:17 PM, RedNeko said:
On 8/25/2016 at 7:33 AM, LJ_84 said:

What the hell is a celebrity crush?! I'm a huge HIM fan and when I was young everybody thought I had a crush on Ville. Like no? I don't have romantic fantasies? I just wanna talk with him about poetry and our favourite writers

I feel the same way about most celebs I like in general (but I also happen to quite like HIM), especially Johnny Depp.

Also sorry this quote thing got somewhat messed up. DX 

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I was talking to my friends last night and I said, "You know what's an awful lifehack? Getting married." One of my friends thought that was hilarious (I did too) xD.

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I think it was middle school, but I remember saying out loud to nobody in particular (that I remember) that I was never going to have another boyfriend. Another girl said, "don't worry, you'll find someone!" xD thanks, but that's not actually what I meant. Also, around the same time in general, pushing boys away without even realising when they tried to randomly kiss or hug me, cos I never asked for any of it.

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oh yeah there were definitely times when someone leaned in for a kiss and I turned my cheek or even put up my hands out of surprise xD

 

 

actually when I  was a teen I totally knew that I didn't give anything about dating. I was like, eh, maybe in five years or so I might start lookin but right now. I'm just not into that scene. not my thing.

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One thing that really annoys me is when they think you're tricking yourself "out of falling" for a potential love interest

 

Like by realizing that you are aromantic, you have rendered yourself incapable of human emotion or something

 

"I totally support you, but I just want to see you happy!"

 

 

 

51633711.jpg

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That's kind of how mum makes me feel sometimes. She doesn't know I found out I'm arospec and I probably won't tell her, but she has said before that she thinks it would be nice if I found someone to settle down with. She says she wants me to be happy, but I think I'll just have to be happy in my own way. We have had the 'future crazy cat lady' talk, so I don't think she'll be too shocked anyway xD

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On 9/20/2016 at 9:08 PM, Dodecahedron314 said:

That moment when you realize that you've been roped into giving people relationship advice every day for the past three days even though you're the literal least qualified person on the planet for that and you just kind of sit there for about 5 minutes, staring at a wall in disbelief and wondering how on Earth your life came to this. 

I'm in the same situation with my best friend and his boyfriend (yes, they are gay).  I have managed to help them with their relationship a few times, I think it's because I'm entirely logical about relationship stuff while for most people there are a bunch of strong emotions involved or something like that.  But yeah, I've launghed at that too because I have no relationship experience and this is my friend's third relationship so you'd think that I am the last person he would ask for relationship advise.

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