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tell me one (or a lot) of reason(s) you love being Aro!


neth
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first of all, it’s nice to find little pieces of my aromanticness that i love, i’m getting over a lot of internalised arophobia. second of all, i love that i can focus more on other things in my life without having to spend time looking for a romantic partner :)

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  • 2 weeks later...

This has been said multiple times and I love that this is a recurring theme, but I love that I am able to channel all of my love into my platonic and familial relationships, I think it makes them feel so much more special to me. I have so much love for my friends and family that it is overwhelming in the best way and that has always sustained me. Before I knew I was aro I always had this feeling that nothing was missing, in the sense that nothing was missing in not being in romantic relationships, there was no void to be filled. In time I realized I was aro and didn't want/couldn't experience that type of love anyway. Now I know that what I really want is to channel more of my love into familial and platonic relationships, the love I thought I would experience in romantic ones. Since realizing I was aro I have only felt closer to the people in my life and have only wanted to be more affectionate with them and then those relationships have only become more fulfilling. 

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This is going to be really short and not greatly explained, so I'd love if someone elaborated.

 

We question the fabric of our society, change what has been imposed since childhood, the idea of a romantic love for every person, which makes us so so valuable.  We question if love is distinctly sectioned (romantic, platonic) or if it's mergeable for others (people in QPR's).  And that's incredible.

Edited by crazydreamer
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3 minutes ago, crazydreamer said:

This is going to be really short and not greatly explained, so I'd love if someone elaborated.

 

We question the fabric of our society, change what has been imposed since childhood, the idea of a romantic love for every person, which makes us so so valuable.  We question if love is distinctly sectioned (romantic, platonic) or if it's mergeable for others (people in QPR's).  And that's incredible.

So you're saying what makes us different also allows us to think outside the box.

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I like that I can value time with my family and friends that much. Althought I'm most of the time an introvert person I still crave company a lot and can't stand being alone. I really enjoy doing everyday activities like watching TV or cooking together without talking a lot, lol.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Lots of food for me.

Dont have to eat things i dont like

Key lime pie only for me

All coffee for me ^^

Don't have to meet extended family and be awkward

Cheap vacations and one day planning at most

Can hang more with friends

Basically not having to take care of someone thats not me.

I dont take usual bs when ppl tell me they where late. Your partner doesnt work for you nor are you tied to them, be on time or dont come at all.

^ me only thinking on partner related stuff but is 2am and insomnia is annoying

Can speak my mind, if i want something I do it or get it.

No romance triangles (based on geometry at least one is queer if we are attracted to each other.)

Romantic movies now are comedy

I enjoy horror movies more since few romance when someone is following you with an axe

 

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  • 1 month later...

I love not having to worry about hurting people when I feel some sort of attraction towards them (context: before I knew I was aro, I've been in relationships because that's what I thought I should do in that situation, and ended up hurting someone that was really close to me because I couldn't get myself to like them romantically, even though I tried. After that incident, each time I had a squish, or just the desire to be emotionally close to someone, I was afraid that I'm not feeling the same way they do, and that I'll just hurt them; knowing I'm aro allowed me to define what I actually feel and want, so that issue is not there anymore)
 

Not trying to be mean to allos, but I feel that platonic love is deeper, in a sense, as it doesn't revolve around what's expected by society, it's not possesive, and can't turn into hate; but it can still be intense. I love that I can love my close friends with all my heart, without having to worry about all the complications of romantic relationships.

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I like not having to worry about crushing on people who are bad for me or falling in love with someone I shouldn't. I squish on a few of my teachers/ instructors, and from what I hear from other people at school having a crush on them seems much harder to deal with than having a squish.

I just enjoy being friends with people without having to worry that I'm gonna fall in love or anything.

On 9/9/2021 at 1:02 AM, 2 Spirit Cherokee Princess said:

So you're saying what makes us different also allows us to think outside the box.

Also this-

Realizing I'm aroace opened a whole new perspective on relationships and life in general for me. There is so much more out there than just love.

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On 11/8/2020 at 12:19 AM, neth said:

Since I've realized I'm Aro I feel so much happiness and affection for this piece of me and I hope others here feel the same! So please comment why you love being aro or what makes you love your Aroness! 

I'll go first! I love the way I love unromantically. I feel like I get to experience more varieties of affection and intimacy that alloros may miss. That makes me really excited. It feels like more colors were added to my life!

I hope this will spread some aro self love as well! So please go wild and let me know all the good feels! :)

I feel similarly. I love how aro-spec + ace-spec folks break down the different flavors of attraction and relationships. It opened my eyes to how many options there were, love wise and relationship wise. As someone who was socialized female, and is fem-presenting, there's always been a heightened emphasis and interest on my nonexistent romantic love life. Generally for folks like me, our self-worth is determined based on how desirable we are to men, sexually and romantically. The persistence people had on it made it even more difficult for me to come to terms with my identity. 

But it was so freeing when I did come to terms. For years, I mistook my general nervousness around men and masc-presenting folks as evidence that there had to be some sort of romo connotations behind it. It took me awhile to realize that a lot of my behavior around them boils down to how I was socialized. It was so freeing knowing I didn't have to use my time to try and fight for something that wasn't there. I thought there was something wrong. Something I was doing wrong, something wrong with me even. But I became more connected with myself. I focused on the relationships I had been invested in all along, but felt foolish for prioritizing because society views relationships in a hierarchy, with romo ones being at the top. I loved my friends shamelessly. I got the courage to enter a QPR. 

I love how much perspective this facet of me gave me, and continues to do. 

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  • 3 weeks later...
10 hours ago, Aroace Sailor Scout said:

I don't have to worry about maintaining a romantic relationship.

That one. Honestly, I used to like the idea of having someone close to look out for me, but it just..... seems like a lot of work. And most of the people I know who are in romantic relationships have major issues or they break up and then hate each other.

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I noticed a lot more of my male friends are fine with letting me meet their girlfriends because they know I won't fall in love with them (this might also be because I'm gay)

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  • 2 weeks later...

I like that I can focus on aspects of my life besides romance.

I like not having to deal with crushes because from what I've heard from my alloro friends, they sound super annoying and taxing.

I feel like I also value my friends more because when I thought I wanted a romantic relationship, I think what I really wanted was closeness with someone else, and now I know I can have that with my friends.

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Figuring out there is more than what our modern society professes in terms of feelings, relationships, possibilities in general. And that if you don't fit, doesn't mean there is something wrong with you.

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I feel that I value my family more because before I knew I was Aromantic I thought of them as a "filler" until I meet my romantic partner and didn't put much effort into patching up misunderstandings or giving them second chances. I also feel that it will be "freeing" to my adult self because I won't have to worry about joint accounts, love quarrels, possibly giving up a lot of time away from my passion projects to spend more time with the romantic partner.

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Instead of putting my focus into a relationship with one person (or a few, in the case of a polyamory-us relationship.  Idk how to spell it) like people in romantic relationships do, I can prioritize my platonic relationships!  My friends are the most important thing to me and I adore them.  I love them just as much platonically as I imagine a person in a romantic relationship would love their partner romantically.  Friends are amazing.

Also platonic attraction (the main form of attraction I experience) is a lot easier to act on than romatic attraction, from what I can tell.  You just become friends with the person and BAM: happy vibes!  There’s not all the build up and tension and anxiety that seems to come with romantic attraction ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

also romantic attraction sounds like the stomach bug or a panic attack.  Glad I dodged that bullet.

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On 9/18/2021 at 2:06 AM, Blake said:

Lots of food for me.

Dont have to eat things i dont like

Key lime pie only for me

All coffee for me ^^

Don't have to meet extended family and be awkward

Cheap vacations and one day planning at most

Can hang more with friends

Basically not having to take care of someone thats not me.

I dont take usual bs when ppl tell me they where late. Your partner doesnt work for you nor are you tied to them, be on time or dont come at all.

^ me only thinking on partner related stuff but is 2am and insomnia is annoying

Can speak my mind, if i want something I do it or get it.

No romance triangles (based on geometry at least one is queer if we are attracted to each other.)

Romantic movies now are comedy

I enjoy horror movies more since few romance when someone is following you with an axe

 

Key lime pie is the best

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I love being AroAce because it means that there is a whole revolution redefining relationships as they stand!! :D (Relationship Anarchy, Loveless aro, Amatopunk, Lovequeer to name a few ^_^ ) I don't have to follow the rules society places on relationships, I don't have to have sex or romo at ALL, I don't even HAVE to have a relationship!!! I can just exist!!!

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  • 4 weeks later...

well im nto aromantic or aro spectrum anymore probably but i can say when i was aromantic the thing i loved was being part of aro community with amazing kind people in it and not struggling with experiencing crush and other romantic stuff- thats what i really loved and love =]

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  • 1 month later...

I love my friends an unbelievable amount and I like to think I can sincerely express it easier than non aros in a way. Theres not really pressure to be like "oh I have to pursue this person romantically now and we have to go through the effort of being romantically involved" like I can just Love my friends with all my heart and hopefully become a better friend because of that.

Also I don't have to go through the nightmare of flirting and asking people out which is a major plus lol.

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While plenty of others have touched on this, mainly that my happiness is not determined by my relationship status. I'm not in, nor do I want a romantic relationship, and i'm happy. Kinda just realising how rare that is.

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