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Aromanticism & Partnerships


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I often switch between thinking I want a long-term partnership in the future, and feeling as though I would enjoy life more on my own. How do you feel? Do you want a partnership (romantic, platonic, etc.) or would you rather live by yourself?

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2 hours ago, arohoneybee said:

I often switch between thinking I want a long-term partnership in the future, and feeling as though I would enjoy life more on my own. How do you feel? Do you want a partnership (romantic, platonic, etc.) or would you rather live by yourself?

Hi! I can honestly say that I go through the same thought process and dilemma that it seems you are going through. Although I am still in my teens, I often go back and forth between thinking I want a long-term relationship, like those that alloromantic people have, however, the other time I think about how I might not actually want that, but just think I do because of the normativity or relationships. I think it’s hard for me because I hadn’t really thought about it until I realized I was aro and now it’s more difficult but I dont think I necessarily want to live alone, so whether that be a really good platonic friend, or a longer term QPR or something I don’t know. And of course, my ideas can change over time!

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I also had this dilemma. I enjoy solitude (need it even), but having a found family is also important to me. After living alone for a couple of years, though, I have been wanting more to share a home with someone (although living alone definitely has its perks!). For me, though, it doesn't necessarily mean that I need a partner. Living with friends who are deeply committed to making a life together is also something I'd enjoy. My dream home would actually be a two-in-one home (like a studio built into a house), so that I could have my own little space, but also be close and connected to loved ones!
Also, you can have both a long-term partner and live alone :) You don't necessarily have to live with a partner! 

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