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Cassiopeia

Early signs that you were aro

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Ooooh, yeah in retrospec I can see some signs that I was aro. 

In general, anytime a boy told me they liked me, showed interest in me, or straight up asked me out I would feel VERY uncomfortable, nervous, and awkward to the point where I did not want to be around them anymore. This has been happening since  the fifth grade when my friend told be he had a crush on me. Like instant "hey we're friends" to "oh I do not want associate with you anymore". 

Also, my ideal "romantic relationship" has always been something like a QPR and not an actual romantic relationship like allos mean... so yeah... that was an eye opener and a moment of clarity to say the least. Like "oooooh, now that makes sense and I'm not weird... cool".

Even looking back on a work of fiction/story I have been working on since freshman year of high school I realize that I wrote the main character to be aro and the relationship they have with the other main character is a QPR... I only realized this after I figured out I was aro and now I'm going "welp, I guess I wrote what I knew".

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1) When I was a little kid, I didn't like to be called handsome (I still don't). My parents would always tell me that one day, I'd like being handsome. Well, I'm 21, and I'm still waiting for that day to come (spoiler: it never will come).

2) I remember, in my elementary and middle school years, coming up with stories for these characters in my head. Their names were Papa Murphy (me), Drew Reilly, and Nico Matamoros (Drew and Nico were two people I knew in real life). The only times where romantic interest was involved in these stories was when girls tried to pursue Papa Murphy romantically, and he, Drew, and Nico always countered their romantic attempts. They usually countered the girls' romantic attempts by Drew, Nico, and others protecting Papa from the girls, and making sure the girls didn't get to Papa. Papa, Drew, and Nico always found the girls' failures to pursue Papa romantically, hilarious and entertaining! Anyway, other than that, nothing to do with romance was involved in these narratives. These narratives mainly involved Papa, Drew, and Nico hanging out at their elementary school in the special ed room, jumping from high heights on the playground, hanging out at each other's houses, wandering around on empty roads in the middle of the night, etc.

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An early sign that I was aro was when I started my relationship and couldn't understand what was the big issues with long kisses, it was just an extended exchange of saliva, and after 2 seconds it was enough for me. Also, I couldn't see why people had to start making out if you where watching a movie, gosh you.are.seeing.a.movie. Let me see the movie in peace, I missed that awesome action part cuz you where kissing me. Relationship didn't last long, but it did helped me discover my aromanticism. (Still salty about missing that action part, I had to search the movie in netflix to see it again but alone)

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Mid teens. 

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One time, my dad and I (and maybe my sister) were at the movie theater, waiting for our movie to begin. We were watching the pre-movie commercials. Apparently, in one of the commercials, there was a girl, and my dad leaned toward me and said something similar to "she's cute, isn't she?" I replied, "not as cute as Katie [Katie is my really fluffy and cute cat]".

Now that I think about it, I look back on that moment with a little annoyance.

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1. I used to fake having crushes on people, even once I realized I liked girls 

2. Completely not understanding the concept of celebrity crushes or crushes on fictional characters (or crushes in general)

3. Loved Mulan, Brave, and Frozen because they didn't focus on romantic relationships.  (Merida is aro, nobody can change my mind.)

 

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