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Costati

Have you heard about "work husband/wife" ?

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Hello everyone,

I have no idea if I'm in the right topic at all. But I've wanted to share something that I just found out not from my experience but on the internet. I'm eighteen so I have no idea if it's real because I've never worked in an office, but I just recently heard about the term "work husband/work wife" and after looking at the definition on urban dictionary I gotta say that I'm really happy this exist. It seems to be some form of queer platonic relationship in a way. It's acknowledging you can have a good relationship with someone that makes your co-worker more than your co-worker but without necessarily being a sexual or romantic relationship. Apparently a lot of people experience that and I think some of them are probably allos. How amazing is it that allos can experience some form of queer platonic relationships ? It can make it way more easier for us to explain these kinds of relationship. I'm excited. 

Here is the urban dictionary definition : 

Work husband: That one special male at work that you get along with so well you spend all your free time at work with him. When you find out gossip you go straight to him to see if he knows yet. You surprise him with lunch or snacks. You don't want to hang with No one else on break. Every conversation with him is great. You can talk about anything to him and he listens. You finish each other's sentences and make fun if your coworkers together. Everyone else thinks it's sexual and you don't understand why because you don't see it that way.

(
for the full link: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Work Husband )

 

I haven't checked for work-wife but it's the same thing in reverse I think.

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Sounds just like a QPR, but at work! 

I imagine it could include a sexual aspect for us allosexuals, although I don't think it would be great to mix sex with work... 

Also, I imagine a work-wife would be the same thing, except female. I'm not a massive fan on the term 'wife' or 'husband' though, as it implies a long-term commitment, which makes me uncomfortable. Still, doesn't have to be long term.

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@Digestive Biscuits : Yes exactly. The term wife or husband isn't the best that's for sure. But it's still cool to know that allos can understand this concept too. 

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24 minutes ago, Costati said:

@Digestive Biscuits : Yes exactly. The term wife or husband isn't the best that's for sure. But it's still cool to know that allos can understand this concept too. 

Oh wait, the term wasn't coined by the aromantic community? That is pretty cool :D

 

OK, I understand now. I hope it goes a little more mainstream so then we can use it as a reference point when discussing aromantism.

 

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18 hours ago, Digestive Biscuits said:

Sounds just like a QPR, but at work! 

To me it sounds more like a romantic relationship without much in the way of romantic coded behaviours. Maybe "queer romantic" or a modern take of "courtly love".
 

18 hours ago, Digestive Biscuits said:

I'm not a massive fan on the term 'wife' or 'husband' though, as it implies a long-term commitment, which makes me uncomfortable.

What i don't like about the terms is the implication of hierarchy and exclusivity. 
Even without romance the couple dynamic is something I wouldn't want to be a part of.

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