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How old were you when you realized you were Aro?


Ali Da Fish

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I am unsure if maybe I am just rushing and jumping to conclusions and a relationship will come later or if I am aro. I am 14 and have never had a crush, I have never been in a relationship or asked out, I find romantic plots boring and get annoyed when a practical relationship in movies is ended because the couple doesn’t “feel the same love as before” or something, feel awkward around friends flirting or hugging their gf or bf, but I don’t want to die alone when I grow up and I would like to raise kids someday (mainly because they will definitely mean I won’t die alone.) I am wondering when most people realize whether they are aro or not so I can tell if it is too early for me to tell or if this is around the age most people realize it.

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It's very different for everybody, I think.

I was fifteen (and a half) when I started identifying as aromantic and I'm seventeen now - and though I still feel like the aromantic label fits me, that could change in the future. If that happens and I feel differently about my identity, the labels I use will have to change too.

I wouldn't worry too much about it is what I'm trying to say.

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I was 25, but that was basically because my ignorance and disinteresting in removing my ignorance about different identity terms. I was 17 or so when I worked out I was asexual-spectrum+something but again I didn't find a term that fit until I was 25. Looking back, if I had known about the terms I would have started using them when I was 17...before that I probably would have been even more confused about myself and the things that were happening if I had known aromanticism was an option (basically it took my entire 16th year to work out that romance wasn't going to happen) 

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I only just realised I'm aro and I'm 21. I was confused why I couldn't really feel for people the way they felt for me, but I wasn't aware there was actually a term for it till I looked it up and found this forum.

I wouldn't say there's a 'too early' or a 'too late' and I believe romantic orientation can be fluid so if you ever feel differently in the future you can identify differently!

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I was 15. I'm 19 now, and nothing's changed.

I think it's important to remember that you can choose to use whatever labels you feel fit your experience, regardless of how old you are. If you end up deciding however many years down the line that maybe something else fits you better, that's fine. That goes for everyone, regardless of age.

 

Long story short, you're not too young to know how you feel.

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I have known I was aro since I was 18 (almost 2 years now), just after I discovered the term. I think I could have known when I was 12-13.

 

As others have said: use whatever label feels most comfortable to you for as long as it feels the most comfortable, be that a few years or a lifetime.

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