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PerformativeSurprise

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Everything posted by PerformativeSurprise

  1. I love kimchi! Actually, I just love Korean food in general. I used to almost always have a thing of kimchi in my fridge. But mine was store bought--homemade is much better (not that I can make it or anything.).
  2. Good points. I've never understood why people think being single equals being miserable . I'm getting to the age where being single is seen as a defect, and it is frustrating. When I was younger, people always said, "Oh, she's just mature and concentrating on her studies!" People always seem to need excuses for why someone is single--then it's okay. But firmly being in the adult category and being consistently single is unfathomable, apparently.
  3. I considered not having to deal with prom a huge perk of being homeschooled .
  4. I took my course exam, which wasn't a disaster, and treated myself to a coffee and brownie 'cause chocolate (and ) makes everything better
  5. Welcome, Sarah! Hope you enjoy it here!
  6. Honestly, being aromantic was never really a question for me. I didn't have a term for it at first, but I knew that, whatever this romantic attraction may be, I had never come close to feeling it. I had never had a crush and never felt any sort of desire to have a romantic relationship; the idea of dating and marriage was ridiculous to me--I knew I could never manage to make that work. I was maybe 15 or so when I started seriously questioning my orientation(s), since I knew that the "something will happen when I'm older" rationale was getting much less likely. At the time I conflated being ace and aro, so I just assumed it was all a part of not feeling sexual attraction. But after discovering AVEN and learning about romantic orientations, it was immediately apparent to me that I'm also aro. I have no idea how to accurately define "romantic attraction." I just know that it's something I've never felt. Watching people with crushes, being in love, or acting in a typical couple way has always been bizarre to me. Whatever that emotion is that they are clearly experiencing is not something I feel. When I was younger, I often simply forgot that people could be interested in dating and such. I never thought about the fact that I hadn't ever had any romantic interest until someone would bring it up. I remember this one time when I was around 15 or so, my mom brought up the concept of me dating (my parents were religious and conservative, so this was an issue), and I thought, "oh yeah, people like to do that." It shocked me though to hear it in relation to me, and I almost laughed when my mom brought it up. I just informed her I wouldn't be doing that. At the time, she seemed relieved. I don't think she thought I meant forever.
  7. Welcome, Athena! Glad you decided to join in!
  8. I like your traffic light analogy, and I would agree. I'm also fine with light PDA, but if it becomes too intense, it makes me uncomfortable. It can just seem really obnoxious sometimes. It doesn't help that I'm also a kind of sex-repulsed ace, so if it seems sexual to me, then I'm definitely uncomfortable. Honestly, it's a bit hard for me to separate the two and determine if it's the aceness or aroness that makes me uncomfortable with PDA. I know that I also get uncomfortable with people being overly into each other in public, if you know what I mean. Like when people seem to be unaware of everyone else and seem in their own little romantic world. So I guess I get uncomfortable on two levels
  9. Welcome, Nai! (I recognize you from AVEN . ) It's nice having people with diverse experiences contribute, and I think it's helpful hearing the romantic side of things. Hope to see you around!
  10. Welcome, Saaaro! Nice to meet you, and hope to see you around!
  11. Introversion and Extroversion are opposite ends of a scale. They are not separate categories, per se. So it is possible that you are simple right in the center of the scale with an equal mix of both qualities .
  12. I always hate those kind of questions! Whenever someone would ask about what my "type" is or what qualities I find attractive in a partner, I would freeze up or try to deflect. Now that I'm more open about being aro I just answer honestly, but before I would get super awkward.
  13. Threads "Weird Situation" and "How to Find Out You're Ace" Merged. Sometimes I find that being ace (and aro) makes me oversensitive to potential sexual/romantic situations. I'm not sure if this is what happened in your case, but for me it can be easy to get a bit paranoid and read into things too much. Since I'm not very good at being able to tell when someone has a crush on me, I usually try to just ignore it unless they tell me specifically that they have a crush on me, at which point I think being blatantly honest is best. But if someone were to continue trying to "pursue" me after that despite me saying I'm not interested, I would likely avoid them and cut contact. And I completely agree with @Cassiopeia's last post .
  14. Welcome! I'm on AVEN as well. Look forward to seeing you around!
  15. Welcome! I hope Arocalypse can help you on your journey to accept your aromanticism. You'll find lots of support here!
  16. Welcome! I also enjoy reading fantasy. I like The Wheel of Time too, but I'm only on book 10. Ha, it says something about a series when you can be only on book 10 .
  17. Exactly. Reading the original article, it was upsetting that everyone basically dismissed her relationship solely due to the fact that this sort of intimate platonic relationship wasn't supposed to exist. She was supposed to be fulfilled entirely by her romantic relationship. Well, at least if she wanted to be a real adult.
  18. Sorry, I'm not sure I completely get what you mean here. Are you referring to this thread you posted earlier: Weird situation ? If so, are you saying that this situation made you realize you are ace?
  19. That does seem pretty comprehensive. Also, I find it amusing that the way it's written makes it seem like a listing of diagnostic criteria
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