I think i'm idemromantic. This is most relatable to me.
But i've seen many posts in tumblr and reddit by people telling their experience and their signs of being the part of this spectrum. and i can't tell if i have something similar. actually i think that i've always been self-blocked.
what i mean: i always had problems with talking to boys. I really wanted to befriend them. But at the same time i ALWAYS was afraid of being romantic towards them without any intention to date them or have sex with them (that's why i think i'm aromantic). So all the posts by idemromantic people were about how they thought that friends are those, who you have a squish on. And i don't quiet understand if it's same for me.
because i've never have any kind of friends (at 14 years old i refused using this word) (because i was always afraid of my own romantic intentions). I saw a guy and i immediately immagined us kissing or dating. BUT I DON'T WANT IT! IT'S JUST IMAGINATION! Everything i really wanted in those situations was to have a normal chat with them as friends.
And i don't have any imaginations, when i want to befriend a girl. i just talk to her, if i have any question, or if i want to compliment her, or if i've seen her somewhere (but i'm still scared sometimes if girls think i might have romantic intentions). But boys are a big trouble to me, and it actually makes me mentally sick. I always made myself get rid of any desire to talk or connect to the guy. and sometimes it was very painful (not always). Right now i have a boyfriend. But i like to call our interaction as a friendship with romatic attraction (or some sort of. i'm not comfortable with "dating" "girlfriend/bofriend", "couple" words). Oh, Im 20 yo
