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Atsmo

Member
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    5
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About Atsmo

  • Rank
    Newbie

Personal Information

  • Name
    Atsmo
  • Orientation
    Aromantic
  • Gender
    Transmasculine
  • Pronouns
    They/He

Recent Profile Visitors

429 profile views
  1. Yep. I totally relate. It's sad to hear that you're still touch averse however I can't really offer any advice as to how to help your situation. sorry Hugging friends has helped me over the years but, and maybe this has only happened to me, but the more I've tackled my touch aversion (more passively over the last few years but recently more actively) the more I've realised just how touch starved I am. Which as you can imagine hasn't really helped my relationship to touch or made people touching me feel less weird.
  2. I used to totally agree with the "repressed romance" part but due to my own experiences I've changed my opinion. I am romance and sex repulsed and I had never really considered a QPR when I found out about them cause I was like "to each there own, I just don't get it". It's only now that last year I developed a strong desire for a closer friendship and more physical contact with one of my friends that I was like "oh, maybe I should try that QPR thing". For me at least, it was kind of an accident and only resulted as becoming a thing due to the sensual attraction that was involved as society says that it has no place in friendships and this freaked me out. In response to your point about people placing their QPR's above other friends, this may be true for others but it's not really true for me. All of my friends hold similar amount of importance to me and where I would be glad holding my QPP for an extended amount of time, I would be happy to (and have) spent literal hours speaking with another friend about my darkest mental health secrets. I can say that the little talk I've seen online about QPR's does alienate me as someone who is quite romance repulsed and I can see how it can look a lot like covert romance. As someone who has been comforted a lot by relationship anarchy, I can say that I see QPR's more as what my research has lead me to believe that they were first about, q*eering intimacy and this proved to be a useful loose frame work for me and my friend to use when starting our QPR.
  3. Honestly I relate to the max. Even now I have a QPP and we've discussed physical contact and what we both want they usually always initiate physical contact and I don't know what to do. I like closeness, yet when entering into the QPR I had a lot of internalised arophobia and I thought that even though I knew they had a "friend crush" on me as they called it, they probably would want more out of the relationship (romance, making out) than I was able to give. This feeling I have around being inadequate has prevailed into our QPR (even though I now know that they are demiromantic) and although the idea of relationship anarchy has helped me a lot not to worry about placing my relationships into different boxes, I am still dealing with the feelings of "appropriateness" that SoulWolf was talking about.
  4. Good to know I'm not the only science/maths nerd! I'm also sex repulsed and quite romance repulsed too. Thanks for the welcome
  5. Hey. I'm VERY new here and I'm excited to meet some other aromantic people and have conversations with them. I only know one other person who is aro-spec (demiromantic), and they have only recently thought about that side of their identity, and only with me so I can't really go to them asking for advice on aromantic things when I seem to be the Aromantic Adviser in our relationship. I'm just excited to talk about and share things that I can't necessarily share with my friends irl/ things that my irl friends don't understand. I am aromantic asexual and I realised so when I analysed who I liked and at first I thought "I'm asexual but I'm probably panromantic cause I wouldn't mind dating anyone from any gender" but then I realised that the reason I had no preference towards gender was not cause I was actually pan but because I had no real want for romance with ANY gender. I enjoy musicals, a lot, physics, maths and the future of computer science intrigue me and I'm very engaged in politics and debating.
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