Got to read it for school and look into the history of it and that is what happened the author based the Jo character off herself and she never got married nor wanted a husband the publishers wanted the book to be more socially acceptable and so they made her add in the character. (This is not confirmed but i read somewhere she purposely made him twice her age and unattractive so she could get back at the publishers by not giving them “Prince Charming”)
I’m sorry you feel that way while I’m Demi romantic and can’t help too much maybe you could consider a queer platonic relationship or committed friendship?
Accidentally slept with my binder on last, night I played at a concert and when I got home I was so tired I fell asleep on my couch… so long story short my back is not feeling amazing rn.
I can only relate to parts of this being a Demi-ro with different life experiences but I understand the “something is not right”. This whole essay is beautifully written and conveys so much emotion in your words it makes me feel emotions I went through of not feeling normal and the pang in my heart that came with that. All in all this is an amazing piece and I’m so glad you found a community here with everyone including myself.