Somewhat of a vent but advice is nice too.
So I am currently in a romantic relationship, because I really like this person. I feel a really strong connection with them so I thought a romantic relationship would work between us. Being aro hadn't been on my mind for a while but this is probably cause I hadn't done a traditional relationship in a while.
But fast forward to now and I keep getting told I'm not showing how much I care enough. I feel really guilty because I do care for them so much, and I tell them this. But they mean in more outward romantic gestures. We are going to talk things through soon but the guilt is eating me alive. It's not that I don't do anything but it doesn't seem to be enough. I've handmade gifts and try to plan spending time with them.
The expectations of a romantic relationship are really overwhelming to me and they do know I struggle with romance as a concept and have been questioning if I'm aro for a bit now.
A shitty ex-therapists voice is in the back of my mind whenever I think about being aro, that I am somehow limiting myself, like I'm going on a diet. But now more than ever I'm beginning to realize how helpful the term aromantic is for me now. For myself and to somewhat quickly explain that romance just isn't something I can provide now matter how I try. I just hope I don't lose them because I really do care about them.
Is there a way not to feel so overwhelmingly guilty? This isn't even something I can technically help but it's eating me alive.