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Status Updates posted by aro_elise

  1. i just took a survey for a-spec people and a question was 'do you have a community, either online or in person, that you feel loves, respects, and understands you?' and i immediately thought of you guys and answered 'yes' so thanks 💚

  2. i saw a movie from 1955 where this girl legit said the words "you just haven't met the right one" to her sister, and i'm like, oh heck, people have been saying that for a long time, eh?

  3. things just ended (mutually) with the guy i'd been sleeping with since October (albeit infrequently) and i have no feelings about it, just moving on.  yup, definitely aro.  also, it made him realize he's no longer interested in casual dating, so yeah, make of that what you will 😆

    1. DeltaV


      nothing to see here, just a garden variety aro :aropride:

  4. told another coworker i'm aro haha we were talking about relationships and stuff, i said i don't date and there's "not a chance" i'll get married, and she wanted to know why.  she responded positively, noting that i get "the good parts of a relationship" ie sex, lol ok i'll take it

  5. my friend was talking about this guy she hooked up with, said she wanted him to like her romantically even though she didn't want to date him??  said she knew i wouldn't understand (she knows i'm aro) and wishes she could be like me.

  6. after my coworker talked about being gay, i felt comfortable talking about being aro and she seemed to accept it, yay.  i haven't mentioned it to any other coworkers, but to a few, when it's come up, i've said i'm not getting married (or having kids), and i believe i've used one of those evasive phrases like "i'm not a relationship person" 😆

  7. i was sick so i got tested for covid and it was negative, yay.  whatever sickness it was was terrible (not the flu, i always get the shot) but i'm mostly recovered.  👍

  8. i have a squish on this guy i hooked up with and i have the classic 'what if it's actually a crush tho?' doubt.  Disaster Aro vibes

    1. El011


      im greyro and love helping questioning people so if you want to hmu and i'll try to explain what romantic attraction feels like and you can see if you relate and if this is really a crush

    2. aro_elise


      oh no, i know it's not, he's just really cute and, you know, amatonormativity gets to me, but then i think about being romantic with him and i'm like, ew no.  same thing every time i'm sexually attracted to a guy and i also want to hang out with him.  but i'm as aro as they come.

  9. i'm a bride for halloween (my mom's dress) and my best friend said i looked beautiful and she would marry me 💕 i think next time i see her in person i'm going to ask her to friend-marry me (unofficial)

  10. i'm hooking up/hanging out with this guy and he doesn't seem romantically attracted to me or do anything which makes me uncomfortable.  that's all, just yay.

  11. i have such an aro crush (squish + sexual attraction--it's gonna catch on), it's this guy at my cottage, like the town, i liked him last summer and now that i'm seeing him again it's back.  the thing is, shooting your shot up here is so high stakes, everyone would get wind of it if i even looked at him a certain way.  but i want to...next summer.  i'm playing the long game.  can my aro allos relate or do i need to woman up?

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. aro_elise


      i've been coming up with all these ideas, like taking a private tennis lesson with him, but i'm like, do i really want to start off by sweating, demonstrating my inferior skills, and paying him?  no.  i figure i'll just make conversation, eventually tell him i think he's cute, and then if it doesn't work out, just not be seen in this town for a couple years. 😄  for now i can practice with guys at home, where i can just disappear into the millions of people--the exact opposite situation to this one.  props to you for going for it.

    3. Queasy_Attention


      Aw, I think doing a tennis lesson with him would be great! It's fun to do an activity with someone and end up equally exhausted and embarrassed lmfao

    4. aro_elise


      aha i'll think about it, maybe i can rope my friend into joining in, you know, moral support.

  12. oh right, it's pride month.  no parades, but still celebrating 🎉:aropride:

  13. i'm 22 now!  i guess i've known i'm aro for about 5 years...it feels like ages.  

    1. Apathetic Echidna

      Apathetic Echidna

      Happy Birthday! 🎆💚💐🎇

    2. aro_elise


      thanks!  i was also born on a tuesday, may 26th.

  14. This is personal but I had sex for the first time (with my ex-bf and current friend, who knows I’m aro), and later when we were going to sleep he put his hand on my waist and kissed my shoulder and I thought ‘yeah, this isn’t working for me’.  I had a feeling this is where split attraction would get tricky.  I hope it gets easier. 

    1. Eklinaar


      I hope it was a good experience otherwise.  I'd say that's a good sign of where to create some boundaries.

    2. aro_elise


      It was fine.  We agreed not to be sexually involved anymore—stuff’s just too complicated between us, we’re good as friends.  But with future partners, yeah, establishing that stuff will be important. 

  15. just thinking about if i didn't know i was aro, how unhappy i'd be.  this community saved me.

  16. my lecture focused on queer theory today, and during discussion, i threw in a casual reference to romantic orientation by saying "cisgender, heterosexual, and heteroromantic".  i also included a line about my aromanticism in the brief reflection we had to hand in.  just sneaking stuff in there. 

  17. i think i have a squish on a guy in my class.  i noticed him last year but we didn't really talk until now.

  18. my friend came out as asexual (i knew she was questioning) and our friend grilled her about it and i tried to have her back without speaking for her.  i just know it's not as easy to explain and stuff in the beginning.  

  19. me: damn he's cute

    my self-doubt: must be a crush

    me: lmao as if 

    1. NotHeartless
    2. aro_elise


      haha right, i'm just thinking about him a lot, but if i try to think about anything romantic with him (or anyone) i'm like, ew no.

    3. NotHeartless


      I know what you mean. Happens to me when I have a squish or sexual crush sometimes (thinking about someone a lot but well, without romantic feelings).

  20. in conversation, my coworker said she didn't want to assume i wanted to marry a man, so i said "i don't want to marry anyone, but i like guys."  how's that for a vague but accurate summary of my orientation?  on the spot, too.

  21. not going to pride this year 😕  i'm working, and i have no one to go with.  are you guys going?

    1. aro_elise


      last year i went with my friend and her uni friends, one of whom is actually aro, but this year she's going with her family, and again, i don't want to antagonize my new employer.  it's chill, though, i don't mind not going every year.

  22. just aesthetic attraction things: i saw a gorgeous woman at a party and said to my mom "she's so pretty!"  though i've told her i'm definitely not, she may think i'm bisexual.  it's far from the first time i've observed a lovely lady.  😆  but wow, she sure was.

  23. my friend (possibly ace-spec) asked about different types of attraction and i explained them and QPRs.  😊

  24. there's a cute guy in my class but i'm not about to just talk to him, you know? 

  25. it's aromantic awareness week! :aropride:

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