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aesthetic mess

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Everything posted by aesthetic mess

  1. here's the obligatory "how do you know if you have a crush" post lol okay so i have these two friends that i like very much. i've known both of them since the start of this past school year, and over this past semester we've been hanging out a lot more and getting closer. a few months ago, we started cuddling regularly. (we all lived in the same dorm, so we did that pretty often.) since school's gone online, we've been keeping in touch -- they've actually been the only ones that i've regularly talked to from school -- and we all met up a few weeks ago for the first time since march. over
  2. i just posted a survey in the visibility, articles, and meetups forum. it'd be great if yall would take it and share it with ur friends! 

  3. I'm doing a project for my sociology class on how the focus on romance and lack of awareness in our society affects aromantic people. I need as many responses as I can get, so please feel free to share this with your aro friends after you take it! Here's the survey: https://goo.gl/forms/ltqySLHtbm6iaYuI3 if you have any additional feedback for me, feel free to respond to this post below!
  4. Recently, I've gotten a lot closer with my friend. I've known him for years, but now we're cuddling and shit. It's great! We've discussed how great platonic cuddling is, so no worries there, but I think that I might have a squish on him. I think I had a squish a few years ago on someone who I was talking to for the first time and who I am now great friends with. But those feelings weren't as strong as these feelings. Since we got closer, I've seen him outside of school at least once a week, far more than I hang out with my other friends (I'm pretty introverted). But we haven't hung out by ours
  5. recently, my friend has gotten a girlfriend, and i'm happy for them and i want to meet her and from what i've heard she's very nice and my friend loves her a lot, but that's the thing. anytime i see them, half the time they're just talking about their girlfriend, which i totally get that they love their girlfriend and they have every reason to let the world know, but do they have to say it every five minutes? and then i feel like a dick for thinking that but i can't help it. every time they talk about how much they love their girlfriend it's a reminder that i'm not their First Person, i'm not
  6. before i realized i was aro, i had been reading the selection series by kiera cass, and the entire plot basically runs on romance. i was midway through the second book and i literally could not finish it. i walked into the school library for the first time since realizing my aro-ness and it was like a switch had been flipped. every book i picked up had romance in it and i couldn't stand it. i used to be a big fan of ya novels; i would read any and all that crossed my path. now, i don't read them so much anymore because 90% of the time when i pick them up, i read the first paragraph, think "oh
  7. coming out to someone as aroace, like i literally said "i don't feel romantic or sexual attraction" and my friend goes "oh, don't worry, you'll find the right person someday!" like i knew she meant well but could i spell it out any clearer???
  8. just an update if anyone was wondering (which you probably weren't): i currently identify as gray/quoigender, which i interpret to mean "i don't know what the heck gender is and i don't know if i feel or not but if i do, it's probably less than other people do," or something like that. basically i feel a connection to the term quoigender and i feel a connection to the term graygender, so i decided to combine them. i think i'm lunarian (woman-aligned) but i'm not sure if that's because i am or if i'm used to thinking and presenting like i am. i don't really know about pronouns either, mostly be
  9. I haven't been on here in a while and this is kinda unrelated, but I figured out my gender! I'm so happy 😊😊😄😄😁😁

    1. Mezzo Forte

      Mezzo Forte

      Congrats! Gender is tricky enough pin down when talking binary identity, so I could only imagine how fun the questioning process can be when you're nonbinary. 

    2. Zae

      Zae

      Yay, congrats!

  10. thanks for all the replies. i was thinking it over, and i realized that i feel like a demigirl, but with the amount of "girl" changing (i think). is there a word for that?
  11. I've been thinking lately that I'm a demigirl or maybe graygender, but recently I've been feeling more "girly". It could just be because I'm actually cis and just want to be "cool", but it could also be because I might be genderflux? The thing is, I don't know if my gender is fluctuating or if I'm just having doubts. I know that I'm really the only one who can determine my gender, but. Advice?
  12. i hope i ace my finals next week

    1. owl

      owl

      good luck!

    2. paporomantic

      paporomantic

      You'll definitely do! An ace can't do otherwise! Focus on the preparation and you won't even need luck, will take them down by pure skill :cake:

  13. Most of my headcanons can be summarized as aro until proven arospec. Also this thread is gold. 👌👌👌
  14. Simon Lewis from TMI is demiromantic and y'all can fight me
  15. Go ahead. That pun is amazing and everyone should use it at least once.
  16. me and my bff are writing a story together, and in the story "my" character is gay, so i texted her and said "hey, my character should come out with this pun: I"m a pretty good archer. I guess you could say I'm an ... AR(R)O(W) ACE" and then she was like "no, this character's aro, not that one," to which i replied "no you don't understand this is me coming out to you with a pun" at which point she died of laughter. that was a mess of a sentence and also that is my favorite pun ever. i come out to people with that pun. it has been by my side through thick and thin. i love puns
  17. of course i got a doctor who quote
  18. me and my friend have declared each other parabatai (platonic soul bond thing, google it) and when we leave home we want to live live together, but i know that one day she'll want to be with her romantic partner rather than me, and although we'll still be best friends, i won't be her First Person. i want to be someone's First Person so bad, i want a qpr, i want a qpr with her maybe in the future. i can't imagine that level of friendship with someone else. i also have no idea what i'm going to do with my life in general. i'm a m e s s
  19. Both, I sing and play guitar, ukulele, and a little bit of piano.
  20. i read the post you linked to and yeah, that did help to explain a lot. I do kind of want to have sex just to see if I would like it or not, but idk who I would want to do that with (the same problem I have with dating). Though sex I wouldn't have to think about for a few years before it becomes weird for me to still be a virgin. but yeah, would that make me not ace? I think it's probably just better in general to just wait until I'm older to start giving myself labels, but it's frustrating bc I want to do that now. those are my thoughts on the subject.
  21. Since I want a qpr, a platonic marriage would be ideal. Just imagine: sleepovers. every. single. night, cuddles, tax benefits
  22. I know that I'm definitely aro, but I'm not so sure about the ace part. Like, I think I've never experienced sexual attraction, but how would I know what it feels like? (this is also literally what I said to friends at sleepovers during the "crush discussion" bit) Part of it's because I'm still young enough to wonder if the hormones just haven't kicked in yet or whatever. Like I pretty much think I'm ace bc I've heard sexual attraction described as looking at someone and wanting to have sex with them, and I've definitely never experienced that, but then again, it could just be a youth thing. A
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