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princessyuuji

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About princessyuuji

  • Rank
    Newbie

Personal Information

  • Name
    rielly
  • Orientation
    aromantic
  • Gender
    female
  • Pronouns
    she
  • Occupation
    full time existentialism

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  1. Princess is really confused and a little intrigued. She also wonders what a Welcome to Nightvale/Jaws fic would look like and realises while typing it was probably in the Jaws universe and not using Jaws as an actual romantic character. She's less curious.
  2. @DeltaV My bad! Personally, I want to believe romanticism is not part of evolution but I recently learned that marriage is one of the few universal concepts in culture. I'm guessing, because humans and pre humans had bigger brains at the expense of being helpless for so much longer, it was more beneficial in natural selection to seek out a single mate and share the responsibility of keeping the child alive for years, therefore the children with romantic parents were more likely to live, etc. Although this idea that 'romantic love is the meaning of life' is definitely a modern construction. The idea of marriage at it's base is only a contract between two people (or more) willing to stay together. As humans we need motive to do that and our motive is this romantic emotion - so obviously it's going to be prevalent in ancient societies and fiction but the value and meaning we place on it is going to vary. Arranged marriage, for example, shows that in some societies the romantic part of partnership comes second to the economic or social values of marriage.
  3. rubydelvai can quote every word of the high school musical franchise and relates spiritually to sharpay.
  4. Zemaddog is really a well behaved cat in disguise.
  5. Ace of Amethysts is planning on moving in to the cloud next door.
  6. @NullVector No worries. It's definitely linked to not being able to reciprocate feelings because it took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I'm aromantic. The problem for me was mostly that people fell for me really quickly, like a week after meeting me and ridiculous things like that, when I didn't have time to figure out my own emotions. The people I dated were all really fascinating and great people I liked a lot and every time I left them heartbroken, when I was totally fine, I felt like I should have know it would be the same or I was manipulating and playing with them. On top of that, I would end up feeling internal resentment or repulsion to them because I felt so uncomfortably anxious in relationships, which I know they didn't deserve. To be honest, I'm still dealing with a bit of guilt that if I had just admitted it earlier it would have spared a lot of people. The test did come with the assumption that you're part of the 'assimilated' masses ahahaha so I'm not sure how far it can speak for the aromantic.
  7. It's hard to say which would be under more pressure historically because there's not many (if any) historical records of people dealing with it. However sex was usually something behind closed doors you don't talk about whereas romance was out in the open and expected. I think both would be difficult to deal with. I will say that for the modern age, sex is a physical act and while it may be hard to identify a lack of sex drive, now that there's a word for it and asexuality is more commonly accepted, it's easier to come across and relate to than in history. Aromanticism may be a different story because love is a concept and it can be easy to tell yourself you feel it when you don't know what it's supposed to feel like. On top of that, western society is heavily romanticised with love being the end goal for a lot of things and aromanticism is not widely known or understood. I don't think there has been as much progress other than general LGBTQIA+ understanding. With that in mind I wouldn't be surprised if there were more people who were on the aromantic scale and just haven't thought of it deeply or don't know it's a possibility. I may be wrong but thats my 2 cents.
  8. I can relate to some of what you're saying. I'm anxiously socially disconnected, I generally don't mind touch and affection but when it's done in a romantic way I feel repulsed, trapped and an overwhelming guilt. I understand the idea that monogamous romantic relationships are not appealing at all but there has to be something more than being strictly platonic friends. I actually found something close to this once; I became best friends and friends with benefits with this guy and I was so happy we both agreed so strongly on no romance. I loved him a lot in a non romantic way and we took care of each other, spent a lot of time together, talked like best friends, had sex. Later I found out the reason he never pushed the romantic side was because he was cheating on someone else with me and the whole thing crashed and burned. He was a bit broken and made bad decisions but it was pretty damn great while it lasted. Seeing as I fell into this by accident and the strange circumstances, I'm not sure if I'll ever find anything like it again and I don't mind that. The idea of a network of sexual friendships is something I can get behind. It's hard to predict the future, but I hope you find what you're looking for x
  9. Name Anxiety Score Avoidance Score your mother or mother-like figure 1.00 1.17 your father or father-like figure 1.00 1.33 your romantic partner 1.00 5.83 your best friend 1.00 1.00 From the original test, "According to your questionnaire responses, your attachment-related anxiety score is 1.89, on a scale ranging from 1 (low anxiety) to 7 (high anxiety). Your attachment-related avoidance score is 5.83, on a scale ranging from 1 (low avoidance) to 7 (high avoidance)." I guess this just confirms the fact that I don't really care much about romantic relationships, especially not enough to worry about them leaving me. I do have so much anxiety that they don't measure in the test that comes out me feeling like a bad person or suffocated. I'm not really shocked, but I'm pleasantly surprised I have pretty good security in other areas.
  10. In elementary and middle school I was pretty so a lot of boys asked me out and I never really knew what to say. I would hype myself up, accept and then break up with them when I realised I felt nothing. I remember when I was 13 I did not understand why my boyfriend liked to hold my hand or why everybody was so excited over it. Our one and only kiss was in his room watching cats vs. dogs 2 and I just remember making him to stop like 5 times so I could watch the damn movie and trying to get myself to stop thinking with his tongue in my mouth. I broke up with him pretty quickly and when he showed up at my door with pretentious chocolates I just felt dread. I broke the heart of my first girlfriend when I was like 15 as well because I was the one who asked her out first, and pecked her on the lips first and invited her over to watch lion king but I was just trying so hard to push myself to feel something. Obviously she wasn't happy about the 'it's not you, it's me' cliche. Looking back it's pretty obvious.
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