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Aliyiah

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Everything posted by Aliyiah

  1. I go to a university/college in germany, so it's different in terms of system but there's no sex ed here that all happened in my previous school when we were about 13. It was really uncomfortable but at least we were split females/males (there's another can of worms that I won't go into rn) but they didn't talk about sexualities. I know I learned about those from YouTube videos and creators that came out, no word in the class that's supposes to teach you these things. As for now, I'm open to two people in my semester bc one of them is also ace but the general opinion is amatonormativity sadly. There's also no clubs or stuff to educate people and if people don't go in my face with that stuff I generally don't care. I'm just too stressed out with my projects to educate other people πŸ˜‚
  2. idk, this song just makes me happy and gives me chills at the end πŸ˜…
  3. Not right now but she's going on about wanting to have grandkids some day πŸ™„
  4. That sounds like my mum, just with kids. She insists I would be a great mum and everytime she meets one if my friends she asks if they're my SO and if I'm dating someone. I told her a couple of times I don't want kids but she's just like, you still have time and you'll change your mind eventually. Also I'm 20, like I'm in uni and don't have any free time so great idea to have a kid.
  5. I have two chevron bracelets I made with the aro and ace flag (it's an arrow pattern). I want to get a shirt or hoodie with aropride ^^
  6. You could approach it carefully (for lack of a better word) and just test the waters. I know I didn't come out to my mum because she's always asking if I have a boyfriend and she's always disappointed if I say no. So I told her I don't want to date anyone right now, without explaining my aroness or that I don't actually want a SO and just watched her reaction. Even if your mum told your family, she would just say that you wouldn't want it right now. Whatever you do, do it if you're comfortable and feel safe. I hope this was of some help πŸ˜…
  7. I was in a romantic relationship and it lasted one year and a half, then we broke it off but he's still my best friend. Would I want it again? I get the feeling of wanting a romantic relationship when looking at the picture movies and the media in general are painting but it's different in real life. I'm not really searching for a romantic relationship, and if it does happen again I wouldn't want to be doing romantically coded things (in my previous relationship that wasn't a problem and he understood the aroness to a point). Long story short, I get and have had that feeling of wanting to be in a romantic relationship for the sake of being someone's important person but I'm not actively searching for one.
  8. Aliyiah

    Body Mods

    I have double lobe piercings on each ear and a helix in my left one, which I really love. Been wanting to get a tattoo on my left either upper arm or wrist, I still haven't decided on a design but it's not going to be too big.
  9. I'm only out to two people about being on the aro-spec. The first one is my best friend, who is supporting but not really understanding (he just doesn't quite get it, also we've dated once and he just brings that up). The other is another close friend of mine who is ace, she's been very cool about and she actually set me on the path to discover aromanticism because she came out to me. Not out to my mum but I indirectly told her that I didn't want to date anyone and it's just frustrating how she always asks about my dating life and about the kind of relationship I have when I tell her of a new friend.
  10. I feel like that a lot. I don't have the romance repulsion but still a lot of anxiety and just trust issues in general. Although I'm lucky to have great friends right now, half of them have a SO and spend most of their time with them. But moving to a bigger city and having a bunch of roommates, like @Emerald Cheetah said, sounds like a plan ^^
  11. I relate to that a lot, when my sister got a boyfriend I couldn't stand him at the beginning. After all he stole my sister and he was the person she spent the most time with. Then they moved together and I saw her even less (maybe once a month) and we just grew apart and it hurt. Right now we're growing closer again, because I'm studying close to where she lives and we can hang out more, but I sometimes feel like I don't know her. I get along now with her boyfriend, after I got over the jealousy that he got to spend so much time with her, but it still hurts sometimes. My advice is, talk to her. Talk to her about your feelings of being left behind and being second choice, I know I should've done that. Maybe she can relieve your fears a bit or she realizes that you could spend more time together.
  12. So here's mine πŸ˜… http://imgur.com/0c0L9gc
  13. The colours are so pretty πŸ™‚ But did anyone else experience the displacement of the aro flag and hiding parts of the descriptions? It may just be a fluke on my phone
  14. So, I have been in two romantic relationships (the most recent one ended a while ago). I want all the hugging and cuddling and just being close, too but going further I'm just not comfortable with. My last SO and I were fully honest and he knew from the start that I was aro and potentially ace ( I hadn't really experimented because I was always just not comfortable with that level of intimacy) but I think he kept hoping that it would change but that was who I am at the moment and it just became suffocating with all the expectations. So in short, I don't mind labelling a relationship a romantic one as long as I'm not expected to behave a certain way and not be pressured or stuffed in a box of expectations. I kept thinking something was wrong with me or that I was broken because I couldn't meet the expectations (as I said I wasn't sure about the ace thing) and in my opinion that is kind of a toxic relationship, more damaging the mental state than the emotional support can balance out.
  15. If I had to choose, it would be the skulduggery pleasant series by derek landy which I'm rereading right now The books revolve around the adventures of the skeleton detective, Skulduggery Pleasant, and a teenage girl, Stephanie Edgley/Valkyrie Cain, along with some other friends. The central storyline concerns Valkyrie's struggle to stop evil forces threatening the world, finally find justice for her late uncle's death, and her internal struggle of keeping the darkness within her to stay within. As I love books with magic, adventures and dark humour, this one was perfect ^^
  16. So I guess I'll start at the beginning: I currently have a friend whom I met during a festival this summer, we've kept contact after it. He lives a few hours away (by train) and I visited him this weekend and now I'm kinda confused about some things. We met with some other people in the evenings but I spent the day from friday til this noon at his place. I realized it was really easy to talk to him, even though I normally don't tell people much about me because I have slight trust issues (the joy of too many broken friend-/relationships) but we kept talking about everything that came to mind, also personal stuff (of course we've talked before in person before and through social media but I just realized how easy it actually was). Right now I'm confused because I feel drawn to him and really want to keep the friendship up and I want to keep contact, does this sound like a squish? It's nothing romantic, that's the only thing I can say for sure. I would say it is but we're already pretty close and from the definitions of squish it's the desire for a platonic connection (please correct me if I'm wrong) but we already have that. Could this be a squish or is it something else? (I know it's different for everybody but some advice would help)
  17. I told my boyfriend that I'm aro before we even got together and we're the best of friends. I also am an affectionate person and he knew from the beginning that a label like aromantic wasn't going to define our relationship. I told him I would do what I was comfortable with, and that he should ask about whatever he was unsure about. That's actually the key point: communication. Most of the things or doubts he might have about it or some things you might be unsure about you can always talk about. Explain it to him the way it feels for you and assure him that your feelings won't change becausr you want to name your relationship a different way. I hope you two work it out (: Please ignore anything I said if you think different, just trying to give advice like I would want to receive.
  18. That actually happened to me Except I was the one getting asked to the movies and then halfway through he tried to hold hands and I felt kinda disgusted and realized it was to be a date and told him later that I wasn't interested Also got asked a few times to get coffee, I love coffee so of course I said yes, only to realize later it was a date.. I too think those things shouldn't be romantically coded.
  19. Native german speaker here, too. I learned english, french and spanish in school, though I did a lot more studying outside of school for english because it intrigued me more. My interest for spanish was gone after half a year (but I had to keep it for 3 years) because I had really crappy teachers. Currently I'm trying to learn japanese (:
  20. I watched a lot of anime but he ones that stuck were: aoharu x kikanjuu, 07 ghost, yume-iro pÒtissière and world trigger. The anime I really liked though was gatchaman crowds, it's about a girl who gets handed a small book named NOTE by a transcendent being, which transforms her into one of the gatchaman. Their purpose is to eliminate aliens ( called MESS) that are a danger to humanity. As the name says they spread chaos. The art style is quite unique, the genres are sci-fi and adventure (no romance ) and the characters are pretty different too
  21. Proud Ravenclaw , though sometimes a bit slytherin. Apparently Erudite in first and Candor in last ^^ Also I am (as it seems) a child of Zeus
  22. Soo, I've never really thought about having Kids in the distant future but now that I do I probably don't want any. It's not that I hate/dislike kids but I never really got along with them (?), I just can't relate to them and they seem to think I'm weird (kind of). Also I think, should I ever want kids, I would probably adopt some because IMO there are so many children orphaned or given up for adoption that I would want to give them a home. Also I don't know what the future will be like, and the current dirrection it's heading in is not a world I would want my children to have to live in.
  23. I recently found the series 'Lie to me', I'm only half through the first season but so far there's no romantic plot (some sidestory but not the main characters).
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