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mewix

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Posts posted by mewix

  1. 28 minutes ago, eatingcroutons said:

    Don't tolerate people who ignore your explicitly-stated boundaries, or people who try to push for things you aren't comfortable with. If you've told someone you're not interested, and they've pretended to "forget" what you said and made you uncomfortable, that's a massive red flag that they have no respect for your boundaries.

    Yeahh after that stopped talking (in that example), I didn't explicitally talk about personal space previously so I guess he wanted to push anything he could I don't even understand why ppl think this is acceptable in the first place but yea. 

    The only problem is that he is friends with some other ppl I know :/ not that ive seen in ages. 

    I've had other ppl who are a little more honest but not straight away. 

  2. I don't know I'd like to know the answer xD

    And some ppl don't seem to even take hints, it's hard to even turn down someone to begin with if they don't make it clear its a date or could be a pre date that's the problem. I could say i'm not interested and they be like oh only want to be friends. When that isn't true intention. Too many ppl are like this and I know ppl who have overstepped my personal space and made me very uncomfortable even after I literally said i'm not interested in you. They claim to have forgotten xD

    I know being unfriendly can work but I wanna be nice and open to ppl not cold lol unless yeah I know they are interested in a way then id back off but u know some ppl pursue hmm it feels like a cold war. Many ppl seem to take advantage or not take no for no. And the only way is to block them out from saying anything to u at all. 

     

  3. There are modern spaces where you only share certain communal areas the rest is yours I think rather than standard sharing.

    I wouldn't want to house share again haha  because of the things involved in that unless maybe just with one other person or ppl that I knew very well.

    More likely probably I would get my own place. 

    • Like 1
  4. Make up with what I see in western world popular atm where u absolutely cover ur face completely seems so crazy tbh. Like you can't even see what the person looks like and often the make up i'm sorry to say makes them look worse than b4. I think it is to appeal to men romantically or something but then ppl mostly women or feminine ppl often say its for themselves so i'm not too sure. Seems like a waste of money anyways, unless u have a condition u need to cover or cope with but if it is a skin condition you would end up making it worse more than likely. I can understand make up as an art form however, or for cameras etc. But it is unfair that it is more expected on Women than Men, when plenty of cultures do not use it at all or didnt at least until western culture brought it in (not to say other cultures didnt have their own form of it just in more recent times). It should not be expected as a thing at all, workplaces should never pressure ppl nor should special occasions. Nor should women be pressured to dress a certain way.

     

    also nothing wrong with a bit of hair on women, even a little beard on women haha 

    Industry marketed it this way in advertising, just seems like another way to sell things on to ppl and make them feel anxious that their bodies r not good enough or to make other ppl judge on ur behalf. Media has warped ppls perceptions a lot.

    I can understand shaving for hygiene purposes tho that is important. And for certain sports apparently. But it is double standard that women are expected too (at least if visible) and men not as much in the same places (tho there are beards).

     

  5. 2 hours ago, nonmerci said:

    If the villain has a love interest, their relation will be hypersexualized, contrary to the one of the heroes.

    I noticed this but I didn't think about it in these words. 

    Yeah I do imagine the villian to be a guy with a sexy temptress type girl xP

    But even in hero movies the love interest often seems to be a prize and almost treated not really human in own right, but yea less sexualised more innocent.

    • Like 3
  6. Nah a psychopath can "love" others but for the purpose of manipulation and fufiling themselves, a lot of them r out dating lol. A psychopath has antisocial behaviour and such. If your not someone with issues like that you ain't a psychopath it's pretty simple xD

    It's unfortunate that media uses such tropes too often, in reality someone with a love interest in not necessarily good. 

    • Like 3
  7. I think dating is meeting with someone and that with the purpose of assessing someones suitability for a "relationship" most likely romantic. It has a specific end goal regardless of whether the date is formal or informal, and most likely you are evaluating someone to see if they r good or not.

    I don't really like this concept of a date tbh I feel like you should just enjoy the time with ppl. Though ofc if u r meeting someone for the first or first few times I guess there is compatibility and that and if u will get a long.

     

    As for romance wikipedia says... (Yea that is my source lol)

    Romance or romantic love is a feeling of love for, or a strong attraction towards another person, and the courtship behaviors undertaken by an individual to express those overall feelings and resultant emotions.

    So yeah 

     

     

  8. I haven't read it but I think the rest we take has value or is needed. Or maybe if we don't want to do something a lot its a sign of an issue or the need to slow down. I feel like often ppl frame things as lazy because there is this conception in at least some western cultures u need to be always or almost always busy. You cant just be like I did nothing, i had a rest, which is more acceptable in some cultures. Sometimes taking shortcuts can be a good thing too haha

  9. I think you can be close to someone without romance and without commitment, I dunno how often it happens because most ppl live this normative structure at least to some extent and even those who don't get swept under those narratives or not heard. I think though maybe the important thing is just getting doing things u enjoy and if u find ppl friends or what not thats good and if not its okay too. I think like its important just to be open minded about things really but ofc not in the sense of overstepping your boundaries and doing what u don't want.

  10. I don't even bother using the word single it doesn't make sense to me haha I feel like it just feeds into that whole idea to begin with. Just live life really, but I do find it useful to read into things and understand. As for social media I don't use it so I don't see this stuff and if I do I mostly just ignore it, though maybe ppl of a certain age can't. What I wouldn't mind is more friends but ay.

    • Like 2
  11. Yeah I used to read into these things a lot I know what u mean I used to get it a bit.

    One person here already recommended mindfulness exercises, I add that observing your thoughts and ur surroundings, taking a walk and going in nature and stuff and bringing urself to reality is important. but yeah having connection to urself and surroundings to a certain extent is healthy. Maybe finding an activity you like and getting immersed in it helps? 

  12. On 12/18/2021 at 2:50 PM, Apex said:

    I'm also an artist and human faces are something that I struggle with lol. I mainly draw animals/furries/monsters/etc, and my humans always look... not quite right. I need to practice them for sure.

    Humans are harder to draw because as people we notice something is odd more often and we take into account more types of human faces with animals and monsters and stuff we don't tend to look into the details as much though they are important ofc to the species how u do them. But I also enjoy drawing those things more often and it's good for the imagination more fun, but I have started enjoying to draw people sometimes. 

    I hear a lot of ppl autism or related get that they don't get faces that well or don't relate.

    Ofc it can also be a preference some people go for other aspects more and other physical I suppose, and even then the face is only one part.

    I do personally like faces tho but it isn't the only thing.

    • Like 1
  13. On one hand culture can shape language.

    On the other hand language can shape culture. I don't think that words like I love you  enforce an expectation thats healthy. Even boyfriend and girlfriend kinda almost have a ring of ownership a certain dynamic is created, and the word relationship itself comes with baggage.

    I think friendships are seen important in our culture tho to a fair extent. Cuz ppl without friendships are seen as weird. If you have no friends ur a loser, or something is wrong with u unless u jus moved or somethin or quite old or have a deep relationship with someone. Not saying that is tru jus saying thats how its framed. Might be less important but still are.

  14. On 11/29/2021 at 7:41 PM, lonelyace said:

    Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM)

    A lot of dsm is about labelling things they find "not normal" instead of understanding that different people might have different needs or just be fine or be going through a bad situation, as well as labelling based on symptom instead of cause (partly because they cant agree what the cause is of things).

    Although thats not to say the issues it looks into don't need to be. But I don't really agree with the way they go about it. 

     

  15. Tbh I kinda find mild distaste for the word aphobia more so because of how I saw ppl act over it. (Nearly typed amphibia lol)

    But one I don't really understand aphobia cuz it lumps in both asexual and aromantic, like I know for sure people can be very pro asexual and yet disregard aromantic completely.

    There is legitimate discrimination for sure,  some of it comes more under amatonormativity to single people, but more is just people just forcing a norm onto people. But I don't think its the same as outright homophobia which still happens today even in western countries, slamming insults, throwing rocks etc. Or even just passive aggressiveness.

    Though yea some places or people or traditional treat single ppl or ppl who dont follow as bad. And yea ppl do feel scared of those who are different or threatened. And not feeling like u can talk about ur experiences openly to others is a legitimate concern.

     

    But I dont think debating the idea of aromanticism is genuine discrimination or necessarily phobia, it really depends on the context. Or perhaps how pushy they are or hurtful. Maybe they just dont understand it.

    Being dismissive about amatonormativity isn’t necessarily phobia either, maybe ignorance or different view. Unless it comes with hate or some kind of internalisation.

    But when you talk to some of these people some will agree with aspects like single discrimination etc. And they don't have bad will towards anyone just disagreement.

    So it is never fair to assume.

     

    Plus I saw ppl joking that they were gonna shoot the "aphobic" ppl (yet what I read was really not that bad but regardless I don't think anyone deserves that)

    Tbh this kinda makes me feel sick I don't like to see violence, but I assume it's just immature people. But I think some ppl just shout aphobic at too many things when not necessarily everything is against you, and divides ppl more. And the word is misleading really, would make more sense to refer to discrimination directly.

    But of course there is discrimination both aro and ace but Id say they are different to each other.

    • Like 2
  16. If he is calling that is taking it very far. Like calling is definitely very out the ordinary in the days of texting, particularly as he is doing it in response to you not replying to a text first then persisting on, when he doesn't even know you, if it were so important he could have texted you.

    I think I would just block, why even reply imo.

    Someone who keeps going on and on pushing like that is not worthy of your time. You don't owe anything not replying to begin with was already a reply in a sense that it communicates you do not want to talk. If it were me i'd be very creeped out and uncomfortable. It is like those scam callers I mean do you answer? Or do you just block lol. That is what I would do. Someone just trying to hook you in like those sales people in the street who pretend to be nice and say wow ur so pretty but all they want is to sell u something xD but ofc sending one single message to say im not interested may help in some cases if you feel that would work.

    • Like 1
    • Thanks 1
  17. Depends on the activity I mean a lot of board games need at least 2 people for XD but there are a few solitare type or rpg that don't. Or if ur playing against each other or whatever.

    As for eating out depends on the place if it is a formal place I probably wouldnt go alone but if its a snacky type places it is fine and chill.

    I think doing things with friends can be fun as they introduce you to things but yeah it can also be fun alone as you get to explore ur own way with less pressures.

     

     

     

    • Like 2
  18. I've seen a different video about straight people being minority think it's dis one 

     

    Something about people slurs like breeders that might happen here too :/

    If its both aro and ace I guess people would still have sex but out of practicality only, until science solved that. People would get together for that reason. As for the aro aspect I suppose things like Romance stories would be taboo. 

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