FragileDear

Sidelines by Mercer Henderson has aro vibes. It's kinda sad but it is about loosing a best friend when they got into a relationship.

I relate to the feeling of going back and forth between going to therapy. I had seen numerous therapists growing up and they never seemed to help, so I was a bit skeptical. I have now been seeing my therapist for almost 3 years. I have come to learn it's their job to help you reach the goals you set. With each goal I have set there are always both immediate things to work on and some planning or preparing to give you tools for the future. It sounds like you might have a goal of being able to handle your lows better. All things to say if you feel like you would benefit from going, there is no harm in going and giving it a try. You might end of trying out a few to find one you like.

Hello and welcome!

I painted my nails in the colours of the aro flag, and Friday I pick up my copy of the book Sounds Fake But Okay that I ordered (the book is being released tomorrow).

Hello and welcome!

As an aroace, honestly just trying to instead focus on how close we are to aro week. It's the one time of year where because of the allonormativity and amatanormativity I find I have to remind myself more often that I'm okay just the way I am and I'm not missing out on anything. I know there are thing's like palatine's day to try to shift the focus on friendships which would be great in theory ( if I had more friends or better existing friends) except being neurodivergent I also struggle with those.

So I don't think I've shared this before, but I found this music artist Blü Eyes who I discovered though tiktok and they have a song called "Breakup with a Friend".. I thought this was really cool because there are a lot of songs about romantic relationships and breakups, but not many specifically about friendships.

Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here

Hello, I recently found out about this cool anonymous letter exchange happening for Valentine's Day. You submit a letter and select who it is for; a questioning aspec, general aspec, ace, aro or aroace. As part of the process you select what category of letter you would like to receive. After you submit by the deadline early next week you will receive an email with a letter on Valentine's Day. Below is an Instagram post with more details. https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn_ugf4LxzV/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Hello! I hope you enjoy your time here.

Welcome!

Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here.

Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here.

Welcome!

For me much of my high school memories are meshed together. My parents divorce was ongoing, so I mostly just focused on school. I had to switch schools between middle school/jr. high and high school from private to public school so that meant I had to basically start from scratch with my friend group. I feel like being aroace and not knowing it affected my ability to connect with other people because it seemed like all they were interested in talking about were things I couldn't relate to (relationships, dating..etc), and seemed much less interested in or focused on school. At the time I thought it was just the difference between private and public schools. I tried to make friends (and did end up making some), but it was definitely a challenge (my social anxiety did not help) and so I spent a lot of it alone. I also lost a childhood friend in the beginning of high school because they drifted apart from me (it had been building for a few years). Years later she told me it was because she was questioning her sexuality and wasn't sure how I would react. That always seemed like a bit of an excuse and REALLY confused me because I like to think of myself as an open and understanding person. This recently came up in therapy, and my therapist pointed out that perhaps it actually does make sense if you think about it in the context of me being aroace and not knowing it. Perhaps, she could pick up on the fact that I wasn't interested in those topics and so then went off to find other people to explore those with. That has been quite the realization for me.

Welcome to the forum! I hope you enjoy your time here. As a fellow aroace I too was a bit shocked to discover that other people weren’t exaggerating.

Mine is based off of the name of a song by Yellowcard called Fragile and Dear

I totally relate to waiting to feel that spark! I feel like there is something liberating about realizing that you don't have to wait to feel anything. Since discovering I am aroace I have come to two realizations. One that some of my desire for a relationship probably comes back to my feelings of loneliness and wanting more friends more than anything. Two is that the ideal type of relationship I want would likely be a QPR.

I'm out in some online communities and to a few people in person (my sister, therapist and one friend) as aroace.

Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time here.

Wow - I felt everything you said. I absolutely love your analogy.

I started questing if I was aromantic shortly after discovering I was asexual (it took months later to be more accepting of my aromanticism). I started questioning if I was asexual when I was prompted in therapy.

I currently don't have a dog anymore, but plan to get another one or pet of some sorts when I feel ready. I would probably put some towards the cost and care of looking after my dog to make sure they are well taken care of, some towards associations/charities I support, and maybe some towards family and friends.