nock

As a kid, I was a big fan of animated movies by both Disney and Dreamworks, but I turned to Dreamworks movies like Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, The Prince of Egypt, and Anastasia. As for Disney movies, I was mostly into Dinosaur, The Lion King, and Little Mermaid 2. For these movies, romance was just a subplot; the movies I liked (that weren't horror) were all about self discovery. Otherwise, the typical romantic movies were just cringe fests for me. I'd sit down and watch a movie and be totally content thinking that nothing romantic would happen, and immediately feel disappointment the second something remotely romantic happens to the main character. And as I grew up and kept writing, I remember planning on giving my fanfic a romantic subplot, but totally forgot about it along the way. In high school... idk. I thought about it a lot but just couldn't bring myself to have legitimate crushes. All I really wanted were guy friends since I studied in an all girls' school. All of my "crushes", as it turns out, were squishes.

I haven't told my mom because I know exactly how she'd react. However, while I was questioning, I did ask her what she would feel if I never had a husband or any children. She told me she didn't know and asked me why, so I told her it wasn't in any of my plans and that I wanted to spend the rest of my life working and traveling. After that, she told me the usual, that I'd "eventually find someone/I haven't really meant guys" (holy hot damn I was most bothered about how amatonormative and heteronormative that statement was). Overall, she was fairly understanding, but I know that's only because she won't take me seriously. Eventually, I will. Probably when I get into college... It really honestly shouldn't be any of her business, but our family upholds a lot of traditions and literally came from nothing (financially) so it's kind of an obligation to stick with each other (otherwise you'll be ostracized and hated behind your back). As for my dad, he hasn't contacted me since I was a kid for whatever reason, so I don't owe him anything. However, it's because of his absence that I owe my mom at least a "Hey, you know I love you and I'll take care of you when you're old like I promised, but don't expect any grandchildren. You can expect dogs, though." I know she'll probably chalk it up to her parenting and her tumultous marriage, and I can be honest with her and tell her that it played a small part in my aromanticism, but-- oh god idfk where I was going with this. She's going to blame my aromanticism on a lot of things, so I'm still trying to figure out how I'm going to come out to her in a way that won't make her start hating herself (if anyone has advice on this, I'm all ears). In the meantime, we're okay. She trusts me and respects my counsel despite the age gap and hierarchy. Trusts me way too much, actually, so I hope it stays that way even when I come out.

Gosh this thread makes me feel better. I'm fully aware that there's no such thing as being an actual bad aro-spec person, but meh it's human nature to feel stupid things and overthink. So based on this list that I've always kind of lowkey hated, I'm a bad aromantic because: I'm a shippy person and when/if I ship, I ship hard. Ride those waves and see that ship through. Although I do have pretty low tolerance for most established relationships in fiction-- especially if the plot is based on romance. I'm very involved when my friends talk about romantic stuff. Of course, my sheer lack of romantic attraction creates a wall there somewhere, but people come to me for advice (as I dole them out impartially and most of the time with an oversimplistic view of things (like "break up with that piece of shit") I don't think anyone has ever expressed any romantic feelings towards me? I got crushed on by kids but that's not counted. No thanks. I have little to no experience with Mating Habits of the Common Folk other than a tragic "date" wherein I was used in a ploy for the asshole to get someone else so. Bars and nightclubs would be fun to visit (except I don't think I ever would unless I'm sure I'm at least 90% safe) just because it's nice to dance with my friends and watch them (or myself) get hammered There are actually lots of romantic stories wherein I like the main character, but mostly during the middle I start rooting for them to not have a relationship and just be single for as long as they want to Also I felt like adding this because lmao. Flirting is such a strange phenomenon. It's like disgusting, cringeworthy banter, but it's so fun to feel so removed and just kind of observe yourself getting flirted at. It's kind of like spotting bullshitters a mile away but you go talk to them just to maybe play along until you watch them squirm when you drop a Very Unexpected Line and send them away all flustered and wanting the ground to swallow them up. I don't know. It's mean, but it seems like a fun thing to do regularly.

Aw hell no hahaha. I'm naturally maternal and I like nearly all kinds of kids because they're cool, but one of my best friends (who really knows how to handle kids) tells me I can't communicate with them to save my life (strangely enough, I get along with neurodivergent kids a lot more). Some kids I've gotten to know adore me, but I think that's mostly because I treat them like they aren't really kids... they dig that kind of thing, don't they. So when it really comes down to it, I think raising a child would be torture since I'm not sure when to get sensitive and nice and not angry unless I'm drunk off my mind. But if raising a dog counts as raising a child, then I'm all for it.