homonoromo17

My best friend is a hopeless romantic and before I even knew I was aro I once told her that i was never in love. Her initial response was "That's kinda sad." When I came out to her, her reaction was "You're gonna find the right person someday!" I think she just didn't understand that I don't want that. Some alloromantics value romantic love above all and just like we don't get them sometimes, they don't get us. In the end they mean well in their own way and since love brings happiness to them, they want the same for us. They don't want us to be forever alone. The thing is - who says we will be? Family and friends will always be there for us, we don't need a "second half" when we're happy enough on our own.

I always kissed my parents on the lips, like baby kisses. I still do. I never saw it as anything embarassing. Like my friends would cringe if their parents kissed in front of us and for me it was heartwarming to see. The moment my ex boyfriend wanted to kiss me tho I thought I was gonna dig down to the pacific ocean or smth. I got sixth sense for romance and I felt that the mood was there, at least from his perspective. God it was uncomfortable but I luckily avoided it. Later after I knew I was gay I kissed my ex girlfriend and it felt...like nothing. The mood was stereotypically romantic but I just felt awkward. I feel more feeling when I kiss my dad goodbye before leaving the car. And I swear if anyone ever hugs me from behind without a warning again I'll punch them with my elbow.

Ah, love at first sight. How does that even work? You freaking look at someone and you're suddenly in love just like that? I thought it was this powerful feeling, how come it's apparently so easy to catch? Those cliché scenes when two people bump into each other and one of them falls behind, so the other one could reach their hand saying "Are you alright?" then the fallen person looks up and *que romantic music* "Y-yes." I guess love at first conversation would be plausable but wth, allos.

I actually enjoy romance in movies, shows or books. I find it entertaining what people are willing to do because of romantic love, whether it be fiction or reality shows and stuff. But a sign for me I guess was that I never understood weddings. Why people need a paper and jewelery saying they love each other or like why spend tons of money on it? It would have the same purpose if you just got married without all that fuzz and did a bbq party later. And the vows, like we'll be together until death takes us apart. B*tch half of ya'll get divorced, why lie? Also I don't get the sentiment of first kisses and stuff. Of course never had crushes and didn't understand why it'd be weird not to have them. Always was the only girl I know who's happy to be single, everyone else gets depressed or talks all the time about wanting to date someone. Once I mentioned to my friend that I was never in love and all she said was "That's kinda sad." I was like why tho, you were just crying about falling in love with another di*k that treats you like sh*t. Oh my god, same! I would take care of like 5 dolls of various "ages" and not think about the husband at all. I also wanted to adopt kids since I was really young and for my whole life when kids were brought up I'd always say I wanna adopt.

Thank you so much, I needed that. I'm so happy to finally be able to interact with a fellow aro! I only know one ace, maybe if I knew an aro before as well I could've realized sooner and avoid the relationship alltogether. But too late for "ifs" I guess. Thanks for the reply, I love hanging around here ❤️

I actually add a lot of romance and relationship drama (love triangles, cheating etc.) in my fanfictions because I just find it amusing idk. Like it's not useless for the plot, it's actually the plot itself and tho I'm aro I read so many books and watched so many movies and shows with romance, that I can succesfully replicate it and appeal to allos. I kinda take it as fantasy yk, love is like kinda magic to me.

So I discovered aromanticism not even a week ago. Before I was horribly uneducated and thought it was only tied to asexuality. The concept of romantic and sexual orientation being separated went completely over my head. Then I stumbled upon a Tumblr post explaining it and was surprised to find out it describes me quite well. The more I dug into it the more sure I was. All these years when I didn't get the sentiment of romantic relationship, when I didn't even desire a relationship like that and rather unjokingly wished to be single forever, never understanding why people get depressed over break ups and being single since break ups were relieving for me and being single was the best thing ever. I found out there were people like me! Finally someone who understood and didn't think it was sad or weird! I have never found any label that resonated with me better than this one and I felt overwhelming happiness that I'm not alone! Since then I spend almost every minute on the internet, reading forums, looking at memes, tiktoks, videos, discussions and I feel so...normal now. The only issue those few days ago was that I had a girlfriend. Today I finally got myself to come out to her as aromantic (after I was supported by my sister and kinda supported by my best friend who actually thinks I just haven't met the right girl yet, but she never liked my gf so she supported me in her own way) and we broke up. She knew for some time that something was wrong so I guess she kinda expected it, but I could hear in her voice that she was probably going to cry. She barely said anything and didn't really want to talk at all so we hung up. (yes, through a phone, long distance relationship) I felt so bad for hurting her feelings. She was always more comitted to the relationship than me and initiated all the romantic stuff, casually mentioning she loves me time to time. I rarely did that, it felt disgenuine and general couple stuff was either awkward or uncomfortable for me. We dated for about 4 months and went on a couple of dates. I already knew that I didn't feel the same as her, I never did, but I thought that it's just that I have to get used to it. Finding out I'm aro opened my eyes and made me look back at my life. Suddenly everything was so damn clear. And while I did feel bad for hurting her, at the same time I felt relief for letting her go and embracing who I am. I'm aromantic. I don't think I've ever been more sure about anything. I'm definitely somewhere on the spectrum, maybe demi, but I honestly feel the most comfortable with aro. My question is... Did I do the right thing when I broke up with my girlfriend? Should I have waited a little longer to see if the relationship was going anywhere? I see aromanticism through my entire short 17 years long life despite being properly introduced to the term just 5 days ago, but can I still be sure? I'll be happy for any reply, I love all of you people so much! You helped me a lot already without even knowing...