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About Vhenan

  • Birthday 05/07/2002

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    The Amazon rainforest
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    College student

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  1. Yeah, I agree. My main problem with this allospec line of thinking is that it's trying to gatekeep who gets to identify as aro or ace.
  2. I've seen a few people (often allos, for some reason) saying that aromanticism and asexuality aren't spectrums, and that calling them so is watering them down. People who experience attraction no matter how small or rare would actually be allospec. What do you think about that? Honestly, it just sounds like exclusionist rhetoric to me.
  3. I found the word and started questioning when I was 14, but I was only able to accept myself as aromantic in august of this year. (I'm 18 now)
  4. I don't think it's good. Sweet and savory things very rarely go together for me.
  5. Of course, It's fine! The whole thing about Queer Platonic Relationships is that you get to define it with your partner(s). It doesn't have any of the restrictions and expectations of a romantic relationship or a friendship. QPR's can be sexual or non-sexual, monogamous or not monogamous, involve romantic coded activities or not, and it's all valid. I understand how sexual feelings can, sometimes, be mistaken for romantic. I occasionally get confused about what attractions I'm feeling too. As for the word platonic: This might not be the most popular usage of the word, but I use "platonic" for anything that isn't romantic. For example, I have a non-romantic "crush" that does not fit the most common definitions of "platonic" because the attraction I feel isn't limited to wanting to be friends. It's very much sexual, intellectual, sensual, and aesthetic, but, instead of calling her my swish, lush, or whatever else, I say squish and, for me, it encompasses all types of attraction that are not romantic. It's ok to use words in the way that fits you best!
  6. I've compiled a list of my favorites. I know there are already many "aro songs" threads here but this is mostly for me. I've classified them based on patterns I noticed. 💚ARO VIBES PLAYLIST💚 For aros by aros "Aromantic" by Lee Porteus "Aromantic Moodboard" by Max Lizanich "For me" by Dearlie "Romance kind of sucks" songs "Don't Fall in Love" by Danko Jones "Fighter Not a Lover" by The Neighbourhood Bullys "Romance is Boring" by Los Campesinos! "Heart Heavy" by Mother Mother "Crush Culture" by Conan Gray "Love myself" songs "Good Thing" by Kehlani and Zedd "Alone and Unafraid" by Eliza "Soulmate" by Lizzo "Holy" Jamila Woods "Show Yourself" by Idina Menzel "my future" by Billie Eilish AlloAro songs "Not a Love Song" by Bülow "sushi for breakfast" by BAYLI "Girlfriend" Bea Miller "Friendzone" songs "Hello" by Martin Solveig "FRIENDS" by Marshmello and Anne-Marie "More Than Friends" by ASHS "Itsy Bitsy" by TIMMS Rejection songs "Never Fall In Love" by Jack Antonoff "it's not u it's me" by Bea Miller "Need Nothing" by VÉRITÉ "I Won't" by H.E.R. Internalized arophobia time! (very sad but very relatable) "Love Love Love" by Of Monsters and Men "I Am The Winter" by The Family Crest "Cactus Tree" by Joni Mitchell "Alone and Sublime" by Mother Mother "A Diamond and a Tether" by Death Cab for Cutie "Doomed" by Moses Sumney "Plastic" by Moses Sumney "I Don't Know How To Love" The Drums "Lack of Emotion" by Skott I still don't know how to classify these but they give me aro vibes "Sick of Losing Soulmates" by dodie "Oops!...I Did It Again" by Britney Spears "We'll Sing in The Sunshine" by Gale Garnett "Dancing With Myself" by Generation X "Me & the Rythm" by Selena Gomez "I Am Not A Robot" by Marina Ant The Diamonds "She Had The World" by Panic! At the Disco "I Can't Make You Love Me" by SOAK "Kalmia Kid" by Chloe Moriondo "Photoelectric" by Örvar Smárason "Turning Out" by AJR "before you go" by Moses Sumney "Tractor" by They Might be Giants "Love Song" by Sara Bareilles "No Lover" by Jetty Bones
  7. Hi, Grace. Welcome! 💚
  8. Hii! Welcome to arocalypse. 💚☺️
  9. I'm technically grey aro, but I prefer using aromantic as an umbrella term. When I say aro I usually mean aro spec. When the distinction is relevant, I just say strict aros and grey aros. I also feel this way. In my case, It's probably because the one time that I did feel romantic attraction was so short-lived and not very intense that it's almost irrelevant to me, so it would feel weird to make it a big part of my identity or label.
  10. Since you only feel sexual attraction under a specific circumstance you are definetly in the grey area of asexuality but I don't think there is a term that describes your experience. Demisexuality usualy involves an emotional bond. Do you think you created a bond with her based on relatability?
  11. Maybe it doesnt't tell you about who they are attracted to because they don't want you to know!!! Aro people don't owe you jack shit. Why are you mad? There are many reason someone might want to use aro as their only label. Maybe their sexual attraction just isn't as important or relevant to them, maybe they're questioning, maybe they're not comfortable with their sexuality or they just don't want others to know. All of them valid and perfectly fine reasons. I don't understand why you are mad!
  12. I've found these Androsexual/Androphilic: attracted to males, men, and/or masculinity Gynesexual/Gynephilic: attracted to females, women, and/or femininity Skoliosexual: attracted to genderqueer and transsexual people and expressions (people who aren’t identified as cisgender)
  13. This isn't an aro thing and it doesn't have anything to do with the original question, but I thought I'd share my nonsensical insecurity around being lonely. I'm scared of being unable to form connections with people. I've had multiple disillusionments with "friends" and, now, it seems my "friendships" don't go any further than the surface. They're just fun people I talk to sometimes. I used to care a lot, and now I don't. I don't even feel lonely anymore and that scares me. Don't know why. I should be happy that I don't feel the need to have friends, but I'm not. 🤷‍♀️
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