Neon

I'm sorry, but the thing you want to do is the only option that will lead to you being in a QPR with them. You need to sit down and have an honest conversation with them about what you want. Plan out what you are going to say before hand. Even write it down and bring the paper with you to reference. But have that conversation.

I love this. And, added bonus, it's pronounced "zee-romantic", and Z is the last letter in the English alphabet, so for a lot of people, it's literally an end of the spectrum.

Most of my music taste is explicitly romantic. I'm still aro. It's about attraction, not actions.

You have a conversation with her. You clearly lay out your feelings and wants and let her decide if that's something she wants as well. There's nothing you can do but talk it out.

Romance Is Boring - Los Campesinos The Record Player Song - Daisy the Great Girlfriend is Better - Talking Heads Birthday Baby - Tori Amos Universal Experience - The Klittens

I read the word and immediately went "that's me!"........then proceeded to try to ignore it for months before ultimately accepting myself lol

The idea that biological male and female humans have "different brains" is pseudoscience. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2021/03/210325115316.htm https://www.nature.com/articles/d41586-019-00677-x As for aromanticism and asexuality, could there be some general cause? Sure. But there's no reason to suspect that.

I was reading a fanfiction my sibling recommended, and the word was in there. I saw it and knew immediately that it was me. I didn't admit that to myself until months later though.

The doubt goes away with time. You have to consider the doubts, and go through why you know they are wrong. Eventually, they'll slow down, and when they do show up, they won't make an impact. I would suggest writing down somewhere all the reasons you know you're aro. That way when the doubts say the same thing they said 2 months ago, you already have exactly why they were wrong and continue to be wrong. Also, remember, labels and identity are fluid. You don't need to fit a dictionary definition to find meaning in the aromantic label and use it.

The "little" part just refers to the whole rest of the spectrum. You can see a non-exhaustive list here. So yeah, if someone felt romantic attraction rarely, they could absolutely refer to themself as "aromantic" and be entirely correct. Overall, if the "aromantic" label helps you define yourself, then use it. The definition is better used as a guide than a rule.

While my identities aren't entirely separate, they are very distinct and I absolutely favor my aro one over my ace one. Not feeling romantic attraction is just more impactful and relevant to how I live my life than not feeling sexual attraction. And yet almost everyone I'm out to irl describes me as "asexual" without even mentioning that I'm aromantic too.

GSA = Gay-Straight Alliance. It's essentially just an after-school club for gay people. Many have started moving away from that acronym though. I don't have a good suggestion if you aren't in school because that's where I help out lol. Maybe a local queer organization is taking volunteers though?

If you are still in school and you have a GSA or similar, you can talk about hosting an info session through them. It's probably too late to do so this year, but there's always next year.

For aro vibes specifically: Romance is Boring - Los Campesinos! The Record Player Song - Daisy the Great Girlfriend is Better - Talking Heads For general songs about friendship instead of romance: Don't Go Away - The Beths Happy New Year - Let's Eat Grandma Two Ribbons - Let's Eat Grandma Brooklyn - Katie Malco

First off, yeah, they were rude. And, yes, your initial response, "that's not funny" was very good. You didn't overreact at all. That being said, your expression of being upset should have ended after the initial conversation. Giving her the cold shoulder all night for an issue you've already resolved is also rude (though not on the same level imo), and just creates a new problem. If you couldn't not do that, which is fair, you should have excused yourself with something along the lines of "I'm not mad anymore, but I need some time to cool down".

I just got a notification for this comment and holy crap it's fascinating how much my outlook on relationships has changed. Back then I was terrified to admit I was aroace to myself. Now I think I've really grown into myself and my identity. I can talk about relationships far more positively and with more nuance than I could when I hadn't yet accepted myself.

I have a giant aro flag above my bed

When objectively toxic relationships are portrayed as super romantic. I read a book once where the love interest literally committed genocide because he was sad the MC died (it's kinda convoluted, she died and got brought back essentially) and I couldn't finish the series it was so awful.

I play piano and I find it delightfully ironic that my favorite era to play from is the Romantic Era.

What happened with me is that my sibling sent me a fanfiction that causually mentioned aromanticism without defining it and started trying really hard to shove all the thoughts I had since I was 12 and heard about asexuality (thinking it included romantic attraction). That lasted until my mom had a surgery (it went very well, she's fine) and I finally looked up aromanticism because that was slightly less stressful. Lots of uncomfortable and scary feelings later, here I am, with my giant aro flag in my room.

Like @hemogoblin said, you seem burned out and really down on yourself for something that is far from life-or-death, not remotely lazy. The reason you need a break is to get the stuff done. Take it from someone who's been there, the only way you are going to start doing it again is if you take a real step back, not one where you still peak around the corner at it every 5 minutes. If we can't convince you that you aren't being lazy (you aren't), then you still deserve a break. Your academics should never come at the expense of your mental health and sense of self worth. No matter what.

You aren't being lazy. And there is nothing wrong with you. Please remember that school does not define you. It's one aspect of one part of your life. In 10 years anyone asking you how you did in high school or college will be laughed out of the room. My advice right now is to put down the homework and set aside your worries about it and go do something with the sole intention of relaxing for a couple hours. Whatever that means for you. Go do it. School is not allowed in that time, so you aren't procrastinating. It's not an easy task but it's helped me when I fall into similar ruts. Finally, a lot of what you said is very concerning. Do you have someone you can talk to about these feelings IRL? If you do, please contact them, I think it's a safe bet they can help more than we can.

I did almost the exact same thing lmao. For me it was 16 but that was only because of life essentially forcing me too.

That's so cool! I'm glad you were able to find some that resonate with you!