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Atlamillia Pixie

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Status Updates posted by Atlamillia Pixie

  1. Today marks the 2nd anniversary of my realization that I am aromantic. Wahoo!???

    This past year had provided new situations that helped me learn more about myself and my aromantic identity. 

    Part of my figuring out that I am aromantic was my aversion to romance while being in a romantic relationship, which is difficult to say the least and I do not recommend. During the past few months I have figured out I am farther along the adverse/repulsed side of the reaction to romance scale than I originally thought. That's fun.

    Another part was while I have known for years that I don't want kids, I have more recently realized that I don't want to get married either. I like my solitude, living alone, having my own space, and the freedom that gives me. Now, the marriage thing might change, but that would require me finding a person who understands and accepts that I am aromantic along with all of the boundaries and expectations of what I (hopefully we) would want in a QPR. Not saying that it won't happen, but I am very content to be single and surrounded by the friends and family that love me. And my cat, can't forget my cat. My cat is the only being I can share a bed with.

    Both of these help answer last year's question of "am I lithromantic or was I suffering from an aversion/repulsion to romance coupled with internalized amatonormativity". It is, in fact, the latter. Also fun.

    So, yeah. Progress was made. I can't wait to see what I will learn about myself in the coming year.

    Cheers!???

  2. Okay, Rant time

    So, I saw my ex in person for the first time since we broke up more than a year ago. While we Dmed each other and participated in the same group group chats, got on group calls together, and participated in the same Dnd group in the mean time, this was the first time we talked face to face since the pandemic started. The reason we got together was to take graduation pictures with the rest of our friends. This gave us the opportunity to talk about the break up and the fallout that followed.

    We both left that conversation feeling so much better! Minus my aromantism (because that was absolutely a factor in why we broke up), we both talked through why we didn't work as a couple and why we chose to broke as well as how we handled each other after the break up. Amatonormativity screwed us both up HARD and he is alloromantic (which just goes to show that it hurts everyone, not just aros). He told me that never loved me romantically, he though he did because we were together as long as we were. I am so relived that I never broke is heart. 

    The both of us left that conversation being closer friends than when we started it and I'm glad we had it. I'm glad to have my friend back.

    1. Acecream

      Acecream

      That’s amazing?

  3. Today is the one year anniversary of figuring out I am Aromantic. Huzzah!  ??? 

    I didn't think that I would be spending me first year as realizing I'm aro and being proud of it would be spent at home or mostly confined to my college dorm room ... but uh, 2020 was built different to say the least. 

    I am happy to be more in touch with myself and to know that I am not broken. I don't have trust issues for no reason. I don't have intimacy issues for no reason. I am not unfeeling for no reason. I am just Aromantic. I don't do the romance thing. There is no reason for it. Its just the way I am. 

    While I figured out the Aro thing, the thing I'm questioning is whether I am lithromantic/akoi(ne)romantic or if it was internalized amatonormativity (f*ck me, right?) at odds with my aversion to romance. And being home during a pandemic has not helped me figure that out. So, I'll figure that out once I can go outside and interact with people with out fear of catching a deadly virus or spreading it to my family. For now, I just vibe with my friends online and keeping finding more aro content online.

    Cheers! ???

    1. aro_elise

      aro_elise

      oh what's up, same orientations (and gender).  congratulations on a year, it's getting on toward 6 for me and i'd say each one was better than the last, in terms of my feelings regarding my aromanticism, and it can't get much better.  

    2. A User

      A User

      Congrats!!

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