Noname124

I think I might be aro and I have a girlfriend and I don’t love her. I’ve never loved anyone romantically before, and I seem to convince myself that I have crushes on people even though I really don’t. I was going to tell her but on the day that I was going to she told me she loved me and I don’t know what to do because she’s in a really bad place mental-health wise and I think if I told her she’d relapse and get worse and I really don’t know what to do. Every time she tries to do something romantic with me I feel sick. I really don’t want to be aromantic, I WISH I could love someone but I don’t think I can and it makes me hate myself so much. It just hurts so so much and I don’t know how or if I should tell my girlfriend as she loves me a lot and I wish I could love her back but it’s been 10 months and I don’t. I feel like such a bad Person because I tricked myself into thinking that I wanted to be with her and by the time I realised I was wrong it was way too late. I’ve only ever had one girlfriend before her, who I had to break up with because I felt sick and had panic attacks every time I remembered that I had a girlfriend. I can’t see myself with anyone in the future at all, but I wish I could love someone so badly. sorry this is a terrible rant but I really need advice and I didn’t know where else to go