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Posts posted by Philotes

  1. One of the things that I enjoy is hearing a really good song for the first time, one of those songs that manages to trigger emotions and gives you shivers

    Another thing is eating foods for the first time. I was allergic to a lot of things as a kid and there are some (in my country) standard foods that I have never tried. There is something wonderful about tasting something for the first time and my friends looking at me excited to see what I think of it 

  2. 2 hours ago, Holmbo said:

    Based on the setup of the movie it was kinda obvious to me that they'd get together. But because of this it would have been great if they went against expectations and didn't do it.

    Yeah probably but I guess I still had hope hahaha


    I really like your compilation!

    • Like 1

  3. Idk if this has been said yet, but Will from stranger things is totally aro (although the show might make him gay). And I totally agree with Elsa and Merida!

    Rn I'm watching Vikings and maybe Athelstan could be aro, but I have only watched the first 1.5 season so that might still change

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  4. I would also like to be in a fwb type of situation, but with actually being friends. I have tried dating apps for this but the idea of romance lurking in the dark made it a very uncomfortable experience for me. The main problem with fwb would be that I would be replaced with a romantic partner for the other as @Mark said. I guess that I would also be open to one night stands, but I would have to feel completely comfortable with the other person.


    • Like 5

  5. I think I mostly crave a deep emotional connection with someone, but not in a romantic way. Something I also struggle with is that I will probably never be someones most important person, because that is usually also reserved for romantic partners. For those two reasons I would perhaps want a commited relationship, but I think I would be to uncomfortable in a romantic relationship. A qpr would be perfect for me I think

    • Like 5

  6. I have never been in a relationship but I have been asked on dates. I used to get sort of excited when people asked me on dates, because I felt like that meant that I was doing something right. But I always cancelled the dates because even the idea of it made me so incredibly uncomfortable that I just could not go through with it. 

    • Thanks 1

  7. I have had very different experiences with different people. My two best frieds reacted understanding and accepting. It probably helps that they are both not really a fan of very intense romantic relationships and gestures. They both have a boyfriend but they do not really put the focus on that when we meet up. The are also the only two people that I have thirdwheeled with  (with their respecitve boyfriends) and not felt like the thirdwheel. 


    My sister was a whole different story. I first told here that I was bisexual and she was relieved that I wasn't asexual ("Oh good you're not asexual!"). After which I said, no I'm not asexual but I am aromantic. Here immediate response was "huh is that a thing?" and "you should date to be sure" (nevermind the fact that I did try to date and that was a horrible experience). She hasn't brought it up again but I am fairly sure that she is still holding out hope that I will find someone. 


    I recently (as in yesterday) sort of indirectly came out to a not so good friend of mine. We were with a couple of people and he randomly asked us what we wanted to do on our honeymoon. I answered honestly and said that I didn't want to get married. He wanted to know why, so I said that I didn't want a relationship. He almost seemed offended by me saying this and he wanted to know why I was so "afraid" of having a relationship. He said that he wanted to understand my point of view, but the rest of the conversation was just him telling me that I am wrong and that relationships are the golden standard and that I'm weird for not wanting any of it. I eventually cut of the converstation but I am still pretty hurt by it. He will also probably get back to it, so I am not looking forward to that. 


    But in the end, the people that matter to me most (apart from my sister) reacted positively! 

    • Like 2
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  8. Quote

    I'm not sure if the term would apply to me that much; I do remember wanting to be in a relationship with her, but I think I only thought that way because I associated any strong feelings for someone to be a crush and that I would want to date them, even if I didn't really. Maybe the idea of a relationship with her did entertain me somewhat, but I never thought about going through with it, I mean I class romantic attraction as something like "to desire a romantic relationship or to do romantic things with someone"


    Ah yes I see what you mean. I do have to say that I did not necessarily want a relationship either. I enjoyed the fantasy in my head, but I would never have persued it. Idk attraction is weird 😅

    • Like 1

  9. 1. I started questioning my sexuality when I was around 14 and I decided on bi when I was 15. There have been some periods where I thought I was lesbian but looking back on that now I think that that probably had to do with being aro. 

    2. Im not sure whether discovering my sexuality had much to do with identifying as arospec but I did join the lgbtqa+ community because of my sexuality, which then led to the discovery of the term aromantic. But I realized I was aro 4 years after my sexuality so I'm not sure how closely related it is. 

    3. Completely seperate for me. I don't really see how I would connect the two. 

    • Like 1

  10. The other day I was drinking coffee with a friend in a cute coffee bar. The waiter served our coffee and after he left my friend said 'I just fell a little bit in love with him'. I was so confused. The entire conversation my friend had with the waiter was 'one cappuccino please' and 'thank you'...?


    Another example is that I never noticed if my friends were in love (like actual in love love, not 2 word exchange in love) and then at sleepovers or something they would tell about how they felt about their crush and my other friends would always say 'I knew it! I could already see it'. It was weird for me bc I am very sensitive and will always know how my friends feel, except for when they're in love. This is probably bc I do not feel romantic love and just don't 'receive' this information. 

    • Like 2
    • Thanks 1

  11. I have had the same as you, but with a guy. I was also always in awe of how beautiful he was (he is still the most gorgeous person I have ever laid eyes on) and I enjoyed being around him. I am still questioning my romatic orientation but I think I am lithromantic, which could explain the maybe crush I had on this guy. I dont know where you are on the spectrum, but perhaps lithromantic could explain your feelings. 

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