Frozen Snowflake

I think like telling people I'm ace, there's the good ones, and then you get the occasional "that's so sad" that kinda breaks you somewhere inside. You want to tell them how proud you are and how you celebrate it, but they just see something missing. But screw them, the opinions of those who have no clue what they're talking about aren't really that important anyway.

I've always thought what I think grows to become who I am. So I was probably a little bit aro from very early on - but I don't think from the start. Most of me was an empty slate waiting to be filled, and I still haven't run out of space to fill. Was I aro or ace when I was born? Well, who knows, but hopefully, I was a baby. But I'm definitely not the same person I was a year ago. Or a year before that. Or a year... You get the picture. Who I am is constantly growing, and I don't think it's possible for much to be born in. But... That's me. If other people say they were born the way they are, then they are. It's hardly my business anyway, lol.

Guess I'm lucky there. I have a good relationship with my mother and siblings, and I intend to have children of my own. Indeed, the problem as an extreme introvert will be finding enough time alone! But if I wasn't the type to be happy alone, and didn't plan to have children... I don't know what I'd do. Get a pet or ten?

Speaking as someone tea-total all my life - wine kinda smells weird. Don't mind if you drink it, but not in my face please? Analogy fits.

The ice cream looks amazing! I need to make that someday. It's actually really amazing to hear you understand that - I thought I'd be all alone! Makes me feel good ^.^ I'm glad to have found it too, and I think I'm going to really like being here. The space and the word.

Well... *Waves shyly* Hello there ? (Very rambling, un-thought-out post to follow, sorry) I've known I'm very asexual for most of a year, nothing really against it being around me, but absolutely nobody home physically or mentally. I always assumed I was alloromantic though... Because hey, I would happily watch "romance" movies, so long as there's plot and no sex or established relationships (because those are boring), I definitely read "romance" fanfics. (Kirk/Spock, anyone?)... But again, no sex or established relationships... They just don't get me... I like the buildup before a relationship, people getting to really know and understand each other, creating a true bond. Kinda loses me when they "get together" and act like it. Funny how I assumed that meant I was into romantic relationships. I always reasoned my way out of why I was the one to leave any relationships I was in. "I'm just too busy." "I'm moving away." "Well, there's this other interesting person." "They need someone more sexual." Recently, I met someone literally perfect. Didn't have any issue with my job or lack of sexual interest, funny, sweet, peaceful, and I'd describe being around them akin to lying in sheltered sunshine, just so much quiet warmth. Because, well, I guess we're raised to believe romance is what happens when you find people like that, I rather dumbly agreed to a relationship with them. At which point, all of a sudden my same old issues were back. Why was I such an "Ice Queen"? Why was it that I just didn't care enough to do the things they wanted to do? Why was I avoiding being around them now? Why could I just never care enough?! So... I had enough experience from past instances to leave before they got any more attached, although it already hurt them a lot. And since then, I've been doing a fair bit of self-discovery, working out that relationships have always been the only thing in my life to create depressed periods, and that really, my "crushes" have always been about wanting to be important to someone, not anything to do with romance. And yeah, I wound up here. So anyway, that's me, coming to wander around your beautiful forum to read what people say and actually for once feel like I actually understand people. Don't mind me. Hi! ❄️