Greeley

: | wow. very cool (/s). honestly im not wholly sure if i wholly parse what FYA was saying (it may just be me being Tired AF rn but like. it's Super poorly worded and confusing)? but if they're saying what think they are (that its weird for alloaros to describe themselves as 'allo' rather than a specific sexual orientation? or smthn like that) then like. what a fucking weird thing for them to get pissy abt. gross of them to police how a group of people they aren't a part of (i mean, i assume they're ace) label themselves. (also please do correct me if i misunderstood what FYA was saying bc. again. tired af rn lol)

it took me several months of ruminating on the subject to figure out that i /definitely/ want top surgery, so i'd say give yourself time. don't pressure yourself to figure it out /right now/ because identity and transition can be confusing as fuck! research. research top surgery styles, top surgeons, peoples' experiences, how recovery works, all of that. the more educated you are, the better, and it'll let you make a more informed decision. also, something that was helpful for me, was learning to differentiate between what dysphoria feels like to you vs what dysmorphia feels like to you, because that can help you gain a deeper understanding of what it is that you want. think of yourself in the future, what do you look like? what feels /right/ when thinking about the body you have, the bodies you could have? IMPORTANT NOTE: this is the shit that was helpful for me, but that doesn't mean it'll be helpful for you. at the end of the day, my advice boils down to know thineself, and give it time. think about it, let the thoughts steep and ferment. research, read, watch- educate yourself. it's confusing and hard, there's no doubt about that. there's also no doubt that this is a very individual thing, and there's no real one-size-fits-all advice. think about what feels right and good to you. that's what's important. you should feel safe and comfortable and good. best of luck! ❤️ (u can always dm me on here if u wanna talk more abt this)

@Magni thx for the tips! (the list is of things to be included, not overall theme options! but i do appreciate the advice abt the no romo love stories thing, i really don't wanna be alienating to anyone). The google form idea is really good, I handn't quite figured out how to go about that part of it!

Hey all! So something that I very much want to do is make an aromantic zine. I know that there are already a couple out there, but tbh there can never be too many! Also it could be a fun little thing to work on during this here quarantine we're all in. I have several ideas as to what /could/ be included (outlined below), but absolutely nothing is set in stone, and I'm very open to suggestions. Anyone at all could make a contribution- I myself would probably want to contribute some writing, as well as organization/facilitation of the whole process. Tbh I've never done this before, so there would probably be the odd bump in the road, and I would welcome advice/help from anyone who actually knows what the hell they're doing, just so y'all know. Please let me know if you're interested in participating in any way, shape, or form! I have no idea if there's any actual interest in this kind of thing, so please lmk! Current Ideas: The Colour Green (i was thinkin a kinda poetic, kinda humorous rumination on the colour green, symbolism etc) Inhuman (voidpunk! hell yes) Aro Affirmations (basically what is says on the tin) No Romo Love Stories (short stories of non-romantic love, whether it be loving your friends, family, pets, world, self, or literally anything else. a nice little feel-good section!) This World Wasn't Made for People Like Us (navigating this world as an aromantic person can be tough- how does aromanticism affect our day-to-day lives? where do we rub up against the system? in my brain this is kinda a comic, but entirely text-based is also obvs a possibility) Answers to Those Awkward Questions (a more humorous section! creative and funny ways to respond to the nagging questions about romance/marriage/love/etc) The Vocab Quiz (a lot of the time, coming out as aro means having to teach people a hell of a lot of new words.... that they never seem to remember. wouldn't it be nice if we could reinforce their learning with a quiz to make sure they actually retain this stuff? here you have it! formatted to look like an actual vocab quiz!) Aromanticism: Past, Present, and Future (historical and philosophical stuff! there isn't a whole lot of aromantic history, but there is some! where did this community come from, where are we now, and where are we headed? also potentially include stuff/interviews/quotes from older aromantics! hell yes) Aromanticism is Punk as Hell (more of a collage page in my head. also pretty much what it says on the tin- an aropunk moodboard kinda deal) Aros in the Spotlight (famous aros! the only one coming to mind rn is Moses Sumney, but i know there are more- im just too lazy to google that rn) Aro Tunes/Movies/Books/Etc. (aro friendly media! as well as songs/stories/etc that resonate with aros) Aromatic Aromanticism (this is more of an iffy suggestion tbh. based on how similar the two words are- what does aromanticism smell like? would be cool if someone with synesthesia would maybe wanna do this? idk man) Aro Art by Aro Artists (art!!! in all its glorious forms. doesn't even have to be on the topic of aromanticism, though that would be totally rad ofc. just want to celebrate the wonderful and talented artists in this community) interested? please fill out this google form for prelim contact info! https://forms.gle/Hz9BLYciaRKW554k7 cross-posted on tumblr

This is more of just a post to get my thoughts out, but if anyone else has something to add then obviously that's fine too. I've identified as aroace for several years now, but honestly at this point, I don’t even know if I want to call myself ace. Like, I am, practically speaking, but at the same time it really hasn’t been a part of my /identity/ for a long while now, not really. And don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate how much that identity label has done for me, but also I don’t feel at home in it or the surrounding community as much, even though I still don’t expereinece sexual attraction and highly highly doubt I ever will. I've also realized that I’ve been gradually shifting my involvement in the aspec community out of ace spaces, and even out of aroace spaces to a degree, into more fully aromantic ones. On insta, I mostly follow aro specific accounts, same goes for Tumblr, and there’s a reason that I have an account on arocalypse and not on AVEN- I just don’t really connect with the community anymore. I think in large part this is due to how much more my aromanticism affects me on a daily basis, how much bigger an influence it has on my experience of the world and how I fit in to it, more than my asexuality ever has. Partially, of course, this is also due to the issues I've seen within the (online) asexual community, the transphobia and arophobia in particular were hard to deal with as someone who is both trans and aro, but just the general toxicity that becomes hard to ignore at a point. And I really don’t mean this as shade on the ace community, these are just things that I haver personally experienced in my years being involved in it. So I think I’ll just be calling myself aromantic, for a while at least, to see how it feels. Maybe I’ll play around with labels like non-SAM aromantic or archaro and the like, but for now, im just aromantic. Maybe I can just call myself a very sex and romance repulsed aromantic. No need to really define sexual orientation. I’m aromantic. I happen to also be sex repulsed. I do not call myself ace, and that is alright, at least for now.

Nothing of that sort really comes to mind, there are books in the general area of aromanticism, but no proper anthologies or the like as far as I know. Totally the kind of project that I would be happy to contribute to and work on!

Hey ya'll, I was just wondering if any of you folks know of any books/articles/interviews/etc that discuss anything in the realm of romance culture/amatonormativity/the like. I'm hoping to do a research paper on the subject for my English class this year, and I was hoping for resources I could actually cite in a formal paper, so that I could know what kinda shot I have at pulling it off before I commit myself to the idea. Thanks a million

I say absolutely, if that reading makes you happy, read it that way! The wonderful part about media is that the control over the interpretation is almost wholly ceded to whoever consumes it once it has been put out there. I personally love the thought that some the dwarves are aromantic! Gods, I think I'm gonna go and reread some of his stuff now!