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Emerald Cheetah

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Everything posted by Emerald Cheetah

  1. @Apathetic Echidna Yeah I keep getting distracted by the video and forget to read the lyrics almost every time I watch it as well 😂That's an interesting point. I never understood why it was referenced as a funeral but that interpretation makes sense. There were only some spots that made sense like when it mentioned that their fates were intertwined and they were dependent on the same anesthesia to survive. Makes sense since, in some cases, there are unhealthy relationships where people become, in a way, completely dependent on each other. I haven't heard of any place in the world evolving to such a thought process so as to throw out marriage. I mean I've heard that there is this new movement in Japan of Hikikomoris (I hope I spelt that right) and they often don't get married ,but it's not necessarily because they don't want to. It's simply because Japan's society can be a very stressful one to live in and so marriage isn't going to happen when many people can't even keep themselves together mentally. And there are even people in Japan who just go off the grid completely, sometimes leaving the families they've built behind. I don't think the Japanese people would rather avoid marriage. But I have heard that domestic violence is very common in married couples in Japan, so again, another reason to avoid marriage or be wary of it. With Japan's honor system, it can be hard to get out of things once you're already locked in. And due to all that marriage might possibly seen as a trap some want to avoid. Long story short, this is super complex and I'm no expert! However this song seems to not so much be about the society, but about two people who are actually in love which is what confuses me most. It doesn't seem so much centered on Japanese culture but instead I could relate this to any unhealthy romantic relationship, perhaps. Luckily, when in doubt, go to the comments section! Because there will always be theorizers commenting under vocaloid songs 🙃 It's a shame most of the comments are in Japanese lol
  2. This response is both related and unrelated to the topic 😅 But your post reminded me of this song I saw called "The Disease called Love". The whole song uses a pretty extensive metaphor so I don't completely understand every single part of it but the title should be enough to explain that the disease is a metaphor for love. However it's clearly a metaphor and isn't saying that love is actually a disease! That's a bit far imo. Link (the song is in Japanese but there are English captions)
  3. I'm not really good with this kind of stuff so I don't know if my advice will help but I would say to be honest and tell her that you're starting to think you're aromantic, too. And, while this isn't possible with every relationship, perhaps try and still be friends. Offer friendship with her because that way she won't really be without you. It will just be a different kind of relationship. And who's to say a friendship can't be a close one. Let her know that being friendzoned isn't a curse. Friendship is a beautiful thing and it's not the end. If she doesn't accept your offer of friendship then I'd say it's her loss and you've done all you can. You deserve to be happy, and being in a romantic relationship as an aromantic is hard enough. She should understand. If she doesn't, it's not your fault. This advice may have been obvious. But that's the first stuff that popped into my mind. 😅
  4. I'm currently really into vocaloid. The genre can do practically anything. It can create whatever genre the producer desires and it has led to the creation of all kinds of unique songs. However if you simply want upbeat and positive, those can also be found with vocaloid. Just stay away from the depressing and dark side of vocaloid if you're not really into that😅 Here's some upbeat and positive (depending on how you view positive) vocaloid songs: Triple Baka <-- I hope you don't mind listening to songs in a different language. Vocaloid is from Japan, afterall! Tell your World <-- Also in Japanese. The translation is a bit iffy but I think you'll get the point. Electric Angel <-- This song is about two vocaloids and the love they feel for their "creator". I don't think there are romantic connotations at all. The love expressed is more in the gratitude sense. And yay! It's not Hatsune Miku singing unlike the last two. So if you don't like Hatsune Miku's voice then here's some variation. 😅 I tend to listen to the dark side of vocaloid which is why I've just picked some of the more popular songs with positive vibes because I don't know much more than this. There's probably waaay more out there.
  5. I have a crazy idea! Let's create a town of just aromantics! They've done something like this in Kenya where women have created a town of only women. So basically, in this town only Aromantics and those on the aromantic spectrum would be allowed to live there. There would be exceptions for cases where we have QPP partners who aren't aspec but want to live with their aspec partner nonetheless. Oh and another exception would be adoption because we can't control a child's orientation, duh. But anyways, this way, we'll never feel alone ever again because we'd be surrounded by our comrades. Our peers. Our community! Of course, creating a town out of nothing is easier said than done. But it's a nice thought to say the least. 🙃
  6. First I learned about asexuality from a friend in high school when he came out to me as asexual. I had no idea what it was until he explained it but I was like "oh cool", and then that was it for a year or two. Then last year (2018) I saw a post on Instagram about Aromanticism. Someone was telling a story of girl who identified as aromantic being discriminated against. Even though I was learning what aromanticism was for the first time, I could still understand it, and I sympathized with the girl. However, it took a few months for me to finally apply the label of aromanticism to myself! And then even more months (on top of the few years) for me to finally accept asexuality. It really doesn't help when society is so good at convincing you that you're straight.
  7. ah the amatonormativity. Did any other options ever occur to them? *cough* Aromantics *cough* Oh wait. That's right! We don't exist.




    p.s. I hope the link is viewable. Usually when I post one, I always find a way to mess it up 😅 



    1. PanDisaster
    2. DavidMS703


      That's why short answer questions are better than multiple choice for opinion questions.

  8. Oh! Of course. Sorry about that. The first one is from Volume 2 Chapter 3. (time stamp=3:18-3:42) The second one is from Volume 1 Chapter 2 (time stamp=1:11-1:41) The episodes can be found on YouTube or the Roosterteeth website. Though I'd recommend YouTube since it's just easier to use.
  9. This kind of belief drives me crazy! It's part of the reason why I'm always so wary around other guys that I start to form a friendship with because I always fear that they'll begin to see me in a romantic way due to that idea that we can't solely be friends. I demand that we dismantle this harmful belief! I would very much so appreciate more guy friends. 😞 No I unfortunately did not bring it up to any of my professors, with or without the support of my club. Whenever I have problems, I have this tendency to keep them to myself, especially when another person(s) is the problem. I guess I'm a bit of a people pleaser in that respect because I don't want other people to feel as bad as I do. So I never bring up the problem to the person causing it since I don't want the other person to feel bad and therefore I never solve the problem. The reasoning is very flawed but I can't help it. I just despise confrontation. And, despite the fact that I've told you all of my problem, I'm not sure I could do the same with my club. I feel more comfortable online than in person. Even though I know my club members better than anybody on Arocalypse, I still think I would trust Arocalypse with my problems more than my club. My club only meets on the 1st and 3rd Monday of every month so I haven't really gotten extremely close with them. I usually just go to the aroace club meetings to forget about my problems tbh. It's a place where I can be myself and forget the amatonormativity exists! Just for an hour.
  10. This was mentioned in the other discussion on the site about aro headcanons but I don't see it here. So I'm putting forth, Ruby Rose from RWBY as Aromantic. The evidence below should be enough to make my case. https://ytcropper.com/cropped/mj5ddefdbae161e Long story short. Ruby is completely clueless to all things romantic. https://ytcropper.com/cropped/sL5ddeffd03e797 Here's another video of Ruby being a dork which is also kind of aromantic if you ask me.
  11. If I had to write a love letter, I would probably have just gone all out over tope super dramatic with it. I actually think I had to write one in high school to a character in a show we were watching. I made the love letter really stalker-ish because then I could at least humor myself while writing it. Though I did this before I learned I was aromantic. It would probably be more painful if I were given a love letter assignment now that I know I'm aromantic. Why is Valentine's day even a holiday? Someone enlighten me. Please. I went through sex education in middle school. It saddens me that the college equivalent still has a ways to go as well. And this doesn't help! Even in a sex education lecture, I would feel uncomfortable about my identity when I shouldn't. I wouldn't be able to speak up because then I'd essentially be correcting the lecturer and telling them "hey you're wrong." and then again. Vocabulary lesson. And that gets very tiring real fast. It's also really uncomfortab to do it in front of people you don't really know. I think once when I answered a question about my ideal person, I said to my Spanish partner that my boyfriend (because Spanish can't be gender neutral) would have red eyes. And they were like..."Wait that's not possible????" And I was like "EXACTLY" (To clarify, red eyes do exist. But are super super rare. And they're not actually red. They are the lack of color and you just see the blood vessels in the eye. However I added after the red eyes that the person would also need black hair. And most red eye people are albinos and therefore they would not have black hair. SO THERE YOU GO. MY IDEAL PERSON IS OFFICIALLY IMPOSSIBLE). Sorry I rambled. But yeah, I had a little fun when I answered the ideal boyfriend/girlfriend question in my Spanish class once. The other person probably didn't get the memo though. I think my problem with the term heartbreak is that it is implied that it is romantic. If someone talks about heartbreak you can almost be certain they are referring to it in a romantic way unless they specify otherwise and that is why is gets on my nerves. Yes, I have experienced friendship heartbreak most certainly, but I feel like when people hear heartbreak,Almost nobody will think platonically unless of course they are on the aro spectrum which in that case you would have no choice. And even then, I almost feel we need another word altogether to differentiate between (romantic) heartbreak and friendship heartbreak because romance has taken over the word completely as far as I can see. I go to Iowa State University. So it is a public college which is also why I am very surprised to be hearing some of these things. Of course, these examples are kind of small in comparison but they still hurt. No, I've never taken a sociology class. To be honest, I haven't taken one because I just don't really understand what sociology is all about. However, with this recommendation, I might consider it as an elective. Sadly, I already signed up for classes for next semester 😅 But I'm kind of interested now.
  12. Hello! It's been a long time since I've been around Arocalypse mainly because I started college, and I've been really busy. But ever since I got to college, I've started to realize something. I thought that college would be better. There was a club called Asexual Aromantic Alliance, and I thought that must mean people knew of our existence. Upon starting college, it certainly seemed like a more open minded place, and it is, but I guess that open mindedness stopped when it got to Aromanticism. I was finally glad to be away from my parents. I even have an Aro pride flag hanging in my dorm room. But that's about as far as it goes. In everyday life I feel like I'm being invalidated despite the fact that I can be openly aromantic and asexual.The amatonormativity is just everywhere! Here's some examples. My Spanish class is the worst example. I really like my Spanish teacher. She is very animated and nice. But then we have these speaking exercises where we talk to a partner answering questions on the projector screen. I can't tell you how many times I've seen a question that goes along the lines of "What is your ideal boyfriend/girlfriend?" Or "What's your ideal husband/wife?". I usually just tell my partner that I'm not going to answer the question and instead let them answer it. But I feel terrible when I see that question. It's like a slap in the face. The second example just came up today in my philosophy class. My professor whom I also enjoy very much was trying to demonstrate something with an example. And all of sudden he went to the example of heartbreak. He said something like "I'm sure by now all of you have experienced heartbreak And he also said "If you haven't, well, I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing." And throughout that little part I was just cringing internally. Surely a philosophy professor would be open minded enough to not jump to such conclusions!!!! BUT AMATONORMATIVITY! I wish I could speak up and say something to my professors when they invalidate me, but I just can't. I hardly feel comfortable coming out at times because I dread the vocabulary speech that I'll have to give and I never know how someone will react. Some people are like "I don't understand how this is possible. I need more explanation." Others are like "WOW SO COOL. YOU'RE AMAZING." Then you have the worst response of "Lol no I don't believe you." And then some are like "um ok." Sometimes it's easier just not to say anything until you're backed into a corner and have no choice but to come out. Does anybody else who is in college experience something like this a lot inside and outside of class?
  13. That's interesting point you've brought up. I've found that I only experience squishes on women however why? I cannot say. Platonic attraction is a very confusing thing for me just as romantic attraction is confusing for those who experience it. Sometimes I wonder if the only reason I experience squishes on the same sex is because I fear getting too close to the opposite sex. Throughout high school, I only had friends who were girls and I found it difficult to befriend guys. They just kept themselves at a distance from me. I always felt that guys only would come close if they wanted to date me. So could I experience a squish on the opposite sex? I have no idea though sometimes I honestly doubt it. Every time I get close to a guy, I start to fear their intentions with me. I've only ever felt close to girls and therefore felt squishes towards some of them.
  14. Happy Friendship Day!! 💚  

    1. The Angel of Eternity

      The Angel of Eternity

      Thank you! I shall have a happy friendship day!!

  15. gave my mom permission to read the first day of my Spain journal and instantly regretted it because I recalled that I had written about my aromanticism in the journal 😬and I believe I mentioned it on the first day too. Luckily I think she just glossed over the term assuming it was some slang since most people have no idea what aromanticism is. This is one of the times that I'm thankful the word is so unknown. 

    1. The Angel of Eternity

      The Angel of Eternity

      I can empathize there. All the skeptical questions would annoy me to bits if that were my mom.

  16. Today while in the car my mom told me about someone's pregnancy announcement and she said something that really triggered me. She said "It's cool that he's found somebody". It's such a simple phrase and perhaps I'm selfish for feeling this way because I should be happy for the couple but when she said that, I felt all kinds of hurt. I felt once again like I was going to be lonely forever, and that statement also reinforced the idea that my mom would not accept me if I told her about me.

  17. I can understand what you mean here. Currently I have my sexuality listed as Asexual and Aegosexual. But before that it said something like "Heterosexual??Asexual?? I don't knowww" and honestly I still don't know. I've never experienced sexual attraction as far as I know but aromanticism is certainly a way bigger part of my identity. Sometimes I wonder if my aromanticism gets in the way of me feeling sexual attraction if I do actually experience it. It's just way too confusing for me! When I went to pride, I bought only aromantic merchandise and no asexual merch. My aromantic identity matters way more to me perhaps because it makes more sense to me than asexuality. I don't experience romantic attraction and I'm fairly certain that I never will. But sexual attraction is a whole bag of tricks that I don't want to get into. So honestly if someone asked me my sexuality I'd probably just say "I'm aromantic" and leave the asexual part out. I'd only ever talk about my confusing sexuality if the topic specifically came up. But to start, I'm just aromantic and that's all people need to know about me unless I should decide to tell them otherwise.
  18. My current plan is just to move somewhere like a city and get a bunch of roommates and live the roommate life. That way, I always have friends around me! Though the problem is finding roommates I enjoy and cherish. I can't just drag my closest friends to an apartment in a city and then secretly hope they never marry so I don't have to see the PDA...Yeah my solution still has some kinks to work out 😅 Maybe if I find some aromantic roommates, now that would be the jackpot! Though almost impossible 😭
  19. I actually agree! I've felt the same way for a long time. Whenever people in the LGBT+ community use this phrase as a way to justify themselves then I do feel quite a bit excluded. I've talked about this in other threads about how aromantics don't really fit into the LGBT+ community because sometimes it seems we don't have anything in common with them (but I still think we belong! This is just a complaint towards the community as a whole). It's a community that just pushes this idea of love and that can be good! But it's not good when you exclude others in your own community. But never do they once defend the idea that it's okay not to love. The aromantics fall by the wayside and aren't in any way reflected in that phrase. ughhh yes. I hate the soulmate stuff. Everytime I see a mention of it, it really irks me. I don't really understand the concept. Of all the 7 billion+ people on this planet, you just happened to come across "the one"?? Puh-leaaasssee. Agreeeeeed. That's the ultimate cringe. People say really weird things when they're in love.
  20. So I had known for awhile that common phrases often push certain beliefs held by society as a whole. And to no one's surprise, there are phrases in support of amatonormativity as well. I've created this thread to see if we, the Arocalypse community, can come up with as many proverbial phrases, sayings, rhymes, and so on that are used today by people in all kinds of situations to push amatonormativity. Here's 2 that I can think of: 1. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage I've known about this one for a long time as it's been said in at least one video on asexuality/aromanticism. It sets out a life path for everyone assuming that you have to fall in love and then it goes even further assuming that you'll get married and have a child! All kinds of assumptions in this rhyme. This isn't a very commonly used saying but I still believe many people hold this belief especially when it comes to parents/grandparents towards their children/grandchildren. 2. It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all What a jab at the aro community (and single people too)! Like do I even need to explain this. I was listening to a song and someone said this and I was just like "no" *turns off song* What else can you guys think of?? There must be more that I just can't think of at the moment.
  21. @eOrion yeah, the only way I can post it is by dragging it from my gmail since I sent the picture from my phone to my computer and I worry it might be blocking people out. I tried it again, how about now? Thanks for telling me! Edit: I converted the image from my phone into a URL. I really hope this worked! I usually don't go onto Arocalypse from my phone but desperate times call for desperate measures.
  22. So I went to Spain in June, and while I was there I came across this shirt and of course I had to buy it. It just screams aromantic! When my mom saw me wearing it, she was like "ok?" but, honestly I'm just happy to have come across something that didn't have amatonormativity written all over it. (if the file isn't viewable, please tell me, thanks!) https://postimg.cc/7fvccCc0
  23. On May 28th, everyone at my college got their room assignments as well as their college roommates and I was soooooo excited. I got assigned to this girl who was majoring in Meteorology. This was something I had long awaited and even though I hadn't met her, it was like a first step towards friendship to me. or towards enemy...ship...whatever you call that. But I really hoped we would become friends in August when we went to college! I'm not sure if most people pack this much hope into their college roommates but I was extremely hopeful that we'd become close friends. However today I went back on to Access Plus (the site that gave me all that important info) and her name was gone. She had left our room and gone to another residence hall. Most people probably wouldn't have cared but I actually kind of felt a pang in my chest and couldn't believe that she would leave. Well actually I totally understand. There are better residence halls closer to campus but it still hurt. I had so many high hopes all ending in friendship and they just came crashing down. Is this what the squish equivalent of heart break feels like??

    1. Ace of Amethysts

      Ace of Amethysts

      I feel your pain. 😟

  24. It's definitely difficult when you have different views than the people around you. I'm the only person in my immediate family with my political leanings while my brother, mom, and dad all lean the other way. It makes it very difficult for me. Just last night both my mom and I heard vaguely about some taxing policy that had to do with transgenders and both me and my mom had different opinions on it. We didn't have the full story though so I didn't want to say much about it. I can tell my mom doesn't really understand trans people. She mentioned them getting surgeries and acted like they weren't really a big deal but they are to the person getting them. I feel like she's the kind of person who says she accepts the community but she hides her discriminatory thoughts and feelings behind other justifications and whatnot. Honestly my family are the type of people who try to justify why Trump has banned Transgenders from the military but still say they accept the LGBT community. It's weird. Honestly I have those same fears. I'm probably gonna just keep it a secret until sometime in the future my mom ends up questioning why I haven't gotten a boyfriend or husband yet. And then I'll just spill the beans at that point. I don't really like bringing up my Aromanticism unless the conversation calls for it. Some of my friends know now (I honestly don't know which ones know because of how I have the tendency to mention it off hand at random times) but my friends tend to be more accepting. It was just that one friend that didn't accept me as well.
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