AroAce

OMG FAVORITE SONGGGGGGG AHHHH I LOVE IT SO MUCHHH

My thoughts exactlyy!

Haii! I'm pretty new here. I just realized a couple of days ago all the "crushes" I had in my life were actually squishes. That was a bit life-changing for me. I always thought I was heteromantic and considered myself one of the most romantic people I knew. You can imagine, then, my surprise when I realized that nope, I have no clue what romantic attraction feels like. However, I have come across the term cupioromantic and everything made sense ...but also started to suck. For anyone who is not familiar with the term, a cupioromantic is someone who does not experience romantic attraction, but is open to (and may even really desire) a romantic relationship. So... I am aromantic as in I do not feel romantic attraction, but I can't help but feel left out in the aro community because I crave romance so much. I can't help it! I just do! I have even considered the possibility that I am just in denial of my orientation. I don't even know... There is just something about romantic relationships that I really really want! I really hope there are others out there that feel the same way... Let me know your opinions in the comments! ❤️ *NOTE: I have experienced repulsion to kissing, though. So I don't know if I like romantic relationships only in theory..? The thought of kissing did not bother me, but when it was the time to do it I was on the verge of a panic attack!*

I feel the exact same way. I wouldn't be opposed to having a romantic relationship and I maybe even desire one. I just never feel the romantic attraction.

The idea of kissing (on the lips) doesn't seem that bad, but irl I cannot do it (it brings nausea, panic, and much more upon me).

I've written love poems. MANY of them.

I'm cupioromantic which means even though I can never feel romantic attraction because I am aromantic, I still really really want a romantic relationship and I love romance a little too much.

I actually agree with this. I just want to feel it once. Just to see what's the big deal about it. But then I'd probably want to go back to being able to "pick my crushes" lol

The worst thing is wanting a romantic relationship, but never being able to feel the romantic attraction. Like, it looks like something I would want so why don't I ever feel like thaaat My brain needs to make up its mind.

When my friend leaned in to kiss me and I coughed on his face to avoid having a panic attack

I identify as cupioromantic or romance-positive aromantic and here are my answers: 1. "I enjoy fictional romantic relationships and would like to experience the same kinds of feelings" Very true for me 2. "I like nearly everything about romantic relationships but do not experience romantic attraction" True..? I found out that in theory kissing is much more appealing than in real life, though. I almost had a panic attack when I thought I had to do the real thing. 3. "I would like to be in a romantic relationship, just not with anyone I have ever met" False. I feel open to be in a romantic relationship with multiple people (my squishes). 4. "I love the idea of romance but I can't deal with it in real life" I don't think I have enough experience to answer this appropriately. I love the idea of romance, but most of the time someone asks me out I say no unless it is long-distance. 5. "I would like to be in a romantic relationship for practical reasons (not feelings)" I don't quite understand this question. I would like to be in a romantic relationship because it seems nice to have someone that loves you deeply and will always be by your side. 6. "I think I would like it if someone had romantic feelings for me" FALSE. Though I think I would turn them down. 7. "I would be fine in a romantic relationship or a QPR" Very very true. 8. "I would like to know what it's like to experience romantic attraction" TRUE. 9. "I'd rather be romantic than aromantic" So so true. 10. "I can't imagine spending the rest of my life as an aromantic person" I can... just dating people. Or having a QPR. 11. "Being in a romantic relationship would help me attain other goals in my life" Not necessarily. I can live being single as long as I have at least one very close friend. 12. "I think dating sounds like fun" It just sounds like hanging out with friends, except exclusively. I like hanging out with friends, so I think I'd like dating.

I thought I was straight then realized I am VERY asexual. Then I thought I was heteromantic which soon turned to panromantic with a few dreams, but after a long personal conversation with an alloromantic friend realized I am aromantic and the reason I could imagine myself going out with anyone is because I thought of dates as, like, exclusive friends hanging out (and it's not like that, apparently..?). So ya.

It's very confusing for me because my whole life I've always thought I'd had crushes. Only recently when I was talking to my alloromantic friend I realized "............shoot. I've never felt this way." I asked her a bunch of questions and by the end I was sure I had never experienced romantic attraction. But the thing is, I consider myself romance-positive. The idea of dating doesn't bother me at all. It actually seems like something I would want! However, I don't ever feel the romantic attraction which can be very frustrating. ?