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About AroAce

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  • Birthday 09/16/2002

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    Romance-positive aromantic
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  2. Hey! I am just going to write "my story" I guess. 😂 When I first realized I was aromantic I was in a bit of a shock. I thought of myself as the most romantic person I knew (or at least one of). How could I be aromantic? I like romance. But with a bit of reading, I learned about what that meant and I realized my "crushes" had been squishes all along. It was a bit confusing, at first. I couldn't really differentiate my feelings. I went to my best friend ever (I appreciate you, Lylu) and asked her a LOT of questions. She is alloromantic, so I figured it would be wiser to ask her about romance, rather than thinking about it for myself since I don't quite understand the concept. Her answers helped me accept that I really was aromantic. However, simply accepting it as the truth does not mean that you are happy about it. For a while I thought constantly about just what that discovery could mean, in the long term. Would I never have a boyfriend, then? Do I even want a boyfriend, or is it just something society has made me believe I needed? I wanted a companion, someone to hug me and really get me. Someone I could stay up all night talking to. Did that mean I wanted a romantic relationship? For a while I thought so. I thought I needed that kind of bond. I identified with the term "cupioromantic." Though I could never feel the romantic attraction, I felt like I really wanted a boyfriend. No, I needed one. How did my thinking change? There is this guy, let's just call him Vet, who I was friends with since elementary school. Unfortunately, when I was in fourth grade I moved away, and we didn't hear from each other for nearly seven years. I had to move again, this time closer to the country I was originally from, and for some reason we came back in touch. We messaged for days on the weeks before my move and we really bonded. I was dazzled. I felt very comfortable talking to him and if I pictured us dating, it seemed like an okay thing to do. At the time, I thought I was something very close to in love. This "reunion" happened five months before I found out I was aromantic. When I moved, life was a big hectic. I had a new school and a new everything and we had to stop messaging. But I still thought about him every now and then, and the feelings would return. About six months passed and we started texting again. But this time, I had a brand new perspective. I knew how to distinguish between a crush and a squish now. I decided I would figure out just how I felt about him. Vet is the person I have liked most intensely in my whole life. So intensely, six months ago I was sure it was a crush. But when I thought about actually doing romantic related things with him (kissing, flirting, holding hands, etc), the good feelings I would get when I talk to him would be kind of.. ruined. I may be open to a relationship with him, but... I don't necessarily want one. This is fine. What we have is fine. And I realized all I really need is to have a friend. A close friend who will do all those things I mentioned (hugging, talking, understanding). That, for me, is enough. I don't need any more. From that world-turning moment I was sure: if I never got any closer to him than I am now, I would not mind. Actually, I would prefer it if things stayed just the way they are. We're close friends, we talk everyday and we share a bond. And it may not be a romantic bond, but it's the bond I have always wanted. Sorry if I just rambled and spammed for no reason.. I hope that helped somehow. In my case, I think I was.. I don't want to say in denial.. but confused about what I wanted. Asking my friends and analyzing my most intense "crush" helped me realize just what were my needs and that helped me feel a bit more comfortable with my identity. Thanks for reading this far 😂
  3. Haii! I'm pretty new here. I just realized a couple of days ago all the "crushes" I had in my life were actually squishes. That was a bit life-changing for me. I always thought I was heteromantic and considered myself one of the most romantic people I knew. You can imagine, then, my surprise when I realized that nope, I have no clue what romantic attraction feels like. However, I have come across the term cupioromantic and everything made sense ...but also started to suck. For anyone who is not familiar with the term, a cupioromantic is someone who does not experience romantic attraction, but is open to (and may even really desire) a romantic relationship. So... I am aromantic as in I do not feel romantic attraction, but I can't help but feel left out in the aro community because I crave romance so much. I can't help it! I just do! I have even considered the possibility that I am just in denial of my orientation. I don't even know... There is just something about romantic relationships that I really really want! I really hope there are others out there that feel the same way... Let me know your opinions in the comments! ❤️ *NOTE: I have experienced repulsion to kissing, though. So I don't know if I like romantic relationships only in theory..? The thought of kissing did not bother me, but when it was the time to do it I was on the verge of a panic attack!*
  4. Hey! I'm sixteen and totally get you. I identify as cupioromantic, which means though I do not feel romantic attraction I still want a romantic relationship. Could this be what you are feeling? Anyway, being aromantic only means you do not feel romantic attraction, which can be pretty cool if you think about it. You don't have to worry about losing control and feeling all those scary things I've heard from people who experience those feelings. You get to "decide" who you like. And you get the advantage of seeing things from a logical perspective when it comes to dating! Hope I helped somehow... Best of luck, gurl ❤️
  5. I feel the exact same way. I wouldn't be opposed to having a romantic relationship and I maybe even desire one. I just never feel the romantic attraction.
  6. Not only romance indifferent, but romance positive. It's really annoying, but I can't control it
  7. The idea of kissing (on the lips) doesn't seem that bad, but irl I cannot do it (it brings nausea, panic, and much more upon me).
  8. One time a guy was hinting that he wanted to kiss me. My symptoms: I don't know if this makes sense... I could taste the adrenaline pumping in me My heart was beating VERY fast (not in a good way) I was shaking I felt nauseous
  9. I've written love poems. MANY of them.
  10. For me: I feel really good around them. Nothing specific, just my brain releases a lot of endorphins when I'm around them and it makes me happy. I want to talk to them. I think about reasons to talk to them because I want to find out more about what they're like. I tend to want hugs from them. I usually really want them to hug me or really want to hug them (they can be so cute, it's really hard not to). I don't feel jealous. I think this is important to mention because from what I've heard from my allo friends, they get jealous if their crush likes someone or dates somebody. When my squish likes someone, I even help them date the person they like!
  11. I'm cupioromantic which means even though I can never feel romantic attraction because I am aromantic, I still really really want a romantic relationship and I love romance a little too much.
  12. I've had squishes on characters, if that counts..?
  13. I actually agree with this. I just want to feel it once. Just to see what's the big deal about it. But then I'd probably want to go back to being able to "pick my crushes" lol
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