TripleA Posted June 16, 2019 Share Posted June 16, 2019 So in the last half an hour to an hour, I've coined a few Aro terms, which I think would be cool to share. Keep in mind, I was drinking a can of Strongbow (cider) while making these up. These terms sort of relate to cupid and archery. Bows & Aros Allromantics - Bows Aros...well..Aros Alternatively Beaux & Aros (pronounced Bow and Aros) in the UK, someone may call their male partner their "Beau" (pronounced Bow), in a romantic relationship, which means Handsome in French, and the x at the end makes it plural. Strong Bow (or Strong Beau) The more dominant person in the romantic relationship. They usually will initiate most dates, pay bills, be the big spoon when spooning and initiate affection. They will take good care of their partner, and are protective of them. Soft Bow (or Soft Beau) The more submissive person in a romantic relationship. They usually are the ones to receive affection, have bills paid for them, be protected and looked after by their partner, be the little spoon when spooning, etc. Strong Aro A strong Aro is more repulsed by romantic relationships, and things of that nature. Think of an arrow, that is very strong and durable, being more likely to hit romance and succeed, like destroying any chance of them being in a romantic relationship, or being against romantic relationships, if that makes sense. Like destroying cupid's spells. Soft Aro A soft aro is really interested in romance such as in books, TV, movies, etc. They like romantic aspects such as dates, or they just really love romance in theory, even if they don't experience romantic attraction themselves. Think of a soft arrow being less likely to destroy cupid's spells, and being less against romance in general. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyote Posted June 17, 2019 Share Posted June 17, 2019 Uh. I'm seeing some reason for hesitation here. Some of these, I just don't see the need for (we already have words like "alloromantic," "dominant," and "submissive" -- what are these alternatives adding?) but others... "strong aro"? "soft aro"? That sounds kind of value-laden and, more definitely, makes it sound like you're framing romance-repulsed aros as "more" aromantic than other aros. Please don't repeat the ace community's mistakes. There's no need to frame some aros as "softer" or weaker than others -- or "less likely to destroy cupid's spells" than others. This feels like it's setting up a hierarchical scale of aromanticism. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assignedgothatbirth Posted June 17, 2019 Share Posted June 17, 2019 I agree with Coyote- I also don't think that it's our place to be coining terms for alloromantics when we aren't them. Why should we be inventing terms for other people? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueKumul Posted June 18, 2019 Share Posted June 18, 2019 Strong and soft aro is no worse than strong and weak atheism. In anything, being called "soft" is nicer than being called "weak". If we want to be really abrasive, we can call romantics "tongue bandits" because they enjoy French kissing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jot-Aro Kujo Posted June 18, 2019 Share Posted June 18, 2019 Yeah, ya mama's soft. And what's with this whole weird aro seme/uke thing? The fuck? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neir Posted June 18, 2019 Share Posted June 18, 2019 I don't think these terms were meant to be taken completely seriously. Just kind of fun terms to run with. They're cute and punny (and the fact you were drinking Strongbow just puts a huge metapun on this whole thing, which I'm laughing about). 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TripleA Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 lol why is everyone being so oversensitive, chill. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyote Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 22 hours ago, Spacenik86 said: Strong and soft aro is no worse than strong and weak atheism. I'd never heard of that before either and I can't say I'd go for that either. 13 hours ago, TripleA said: lol why is everyone being so oversensitive, chill. This is the only overreaction I see in this thread. You really gonna accuse "everyone" of "oversensitivity"? Even Neir/running.tally, who posted solely to call the idea cute and fun? Take it easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 On 6/17/2019 at 12:33 AM, TripleA said: So in the last half an hour to an hour, I've coined a few Aro terms, which I think would be cool to share. Keep in mind, I was drinking a can of Strongbow (cider) while making these up. These terms sort of relate to cupid and archery. Bows & Aros Allromantics - Bows Aros...well..Aros Apart from a high level of "punary" this seems to just be a synonym for "allosexual". On 6/17/2019 at 12:33 AM, TripleA said: Alternatively Beaux & Aros (pronounced Bow and Aros) in the UK, someone may call their male partner their "Beau" (pronounced Bow), in a romantic relationship, which means Handsome in French, and the x at the end makes it plural. From a non binary POV I'd advocate fewer gendered terms. On 6/17/2019 at 12:33 AM, TripleA said: Strong Bow (or Strong Beau) The more dominant person in the romantic relationship. They usually will initiate most dates, pay bills, be the big spoon when spooning and initiate affection. They will take good care of their partner, and are protective of them. Soft Bow (or Soft Beau) The more submissive person in a romantic relationship. They usually are the ones to receive affection, have bills paid for them, be protected and looked after by their partner, be the little spoon when spooning, etc. Multiple issues with this one. D/s relationships need not be romantic. No need they be sexual or queer platonic either. The idea of "dominant" or "submissive" is a false dichotomy, even for kinky relationships. Huge conflation of strength, initiation (of dates and affection), bill paying, protecting, looking after, etc with D/s dynamics. Its fairly trivial to find D/s relationships where the sub does things in the "strong" list and the dom(me) does things in the "soft" list. Most obviously with "service tops" and "fin dommes". On 6/17/2019 at 12:33 AM, TripleA said: Strong Aro A strong Aro is more repulsed by romantic relationships, and things of that nature. Think of an arrow, that is very strong and durable, being more likely to hit romance and succeed, like destroying any chance of them being in a romantic relationship, or being against romantic relationships, if that makes sense. Like destroying cupid's spells. Soft Aro A soft aro is really interested in romance such as in books, TV, movies, etc. They like romantic aspects such as dates, or they just really love romance in theory, even if they don't experience romantic attraction themselves. Think of a soft arrow being less likely to destroy cupid's spells, and being less against romance in general. Aros can be, highly, repulsed by romance, whilst also enjoying romantic coded activities. Someone's taste in fiction genre tells them you nothing about what they like in real life. It's also the case that Cupid was originally about sex, lust, physical desire, etc. On 6/17/2019 at 2:47 AM, Coyote said: "strong aro"? "soft aro"? That sounds kind of value-laden and, more definitely, makes it sound like you're framing romance-repulsed aros as "more" aromantic than other aros. Please don't repeat the ace community's mistakes. There's no need to frame some aros as "softer" or weaker than others -- or "less likely to destroy cupid's spells" than others. This feels like it's setting up a hierarchical scale of aromanticism. In addition to hierarchy I see false dichotomies and conflations. 23 hours ago, Spacenik86 said: If we want to be really abrasive, we can call romantics "tongue bandits" because they enjoy French kissing. That dosn't work since there are philemaphobic alloromantics and aromantics who like kissing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nonmerci Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 2 hours ago, Mark said: Someone's taste in fiction genre tells them you nothing about what they like in real life. So true! I enjoy when characters final ly get their first kiss in fiction, but in real life... nope, the idea of someone kiss in me sounds disgusting. For this list of terms, I just take it as something for fun, not something we are suppose to use. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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