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You might be aro if...


Robin

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  • 3 weeks later...

Your final attempt at a relationship was as "the other woman", thinking that if he was already in a relationship, he'd just come to you for sex, not "couple things". 

 

No? Just me? ??

 

(The morality is strong with this one. *sigh*)

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YMBAI you try to figure out if your aro and find out that crushes are supposed to be passionate and strong and almost obsessive

 

If you get curious and look at the Wikipedia page for Romantic Attraction and get super confused because it made it sound like romance was just strong friendship plus social norms from the middle ages added, and when you asked a discord server of mostly alloromantics you found out no one else got confused and they told you there were ancient legends of romance so no, it wasn't invented in the middle ages between knights and ladies. 

 

If you can't understand why people ever question their sexuality (excluding acespec stuff) because they could just find porn and find out in an hour, only realizing.... uh... yesterday that most people wrap their sexual attraction with their romantic one. 

 

 

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YMBAI you don't realize people are dating until they come straight out with it because you assume anyone can be that close and still be friends. Sometimes you find the news kind of disappointing because it's yet another case of 'friendship has to lead to more' which helps the aro agenda in no way.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 8/28/2018 at 5:04 PM, David Box said:

If you get curious and look at the Wikipedia page for Romantic Attraction and get super confused because it made it sound like romance was just strong friendship plus social norms from the middle ages added,

 

 

I looked at it a few weeks ago so I relate a lot haha To this day, I still have no clue about what it is x)

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 4/9/2016 at 11:21 PM, DannyFenton123 said:

YMBAI people constantly tell you you're flirting and you're like, 'What? That was flirting?'

 

@DannyFenton123 OMG YES. One time, I tried to play footsie with a friend and they told me footsie was flirting and I was so confused because I sincerely thought footsie was just a game you play with someone when you want to annoy them or have fun. Like seriously, I just see it as a friendly competition of trapping the other person's feet. HOW IS THAT FLIRTING?!?!? 

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If you're asking your friends what crushes are supposed to feel like

If you're mis-identifying as bi or pan

If you assume everyone is just exaggerating

If you don't know how to flirt/don't know when someone's flirting with you

If you assume people want romantic relationships because they're like Mega Friendships (I assumed this and was surprised to find out that there's some other element to it)

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YMBAI you have literally run away the first time you realized a super friendly person you were chatting with was hitting on you and you had  no idea what to do and panicked. 

 

YMBAI the only part about your wedding you were able to imagine as a kid was the exotic honeymoon, and for some reason the new spouse is always MIA.

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  • 3 weeks later...

YMBAI when you were younger you wondered if you ever had a crush and decide to take a quiz online. When the first question asks about how you feel around “him/her” you think “Wait, I’m supposed to have someone specific in mind?!?” 

Also YMBAI you seemed to be the only person who thought that dating was pointless in middle school because the end goal of dating is to get married, (which is also just something that people do because everyone else does it) and there is an extremely small chance of marrying someone you date in middle school. Then you find out that people don’t date with marriage in mind they just... like dating people. Then you are even more confused. 

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23 hours ago, CheeseOverlord said:

YMBAI you ruined your public image and made yourself unattractive just to prevent people from flirting with you

That's something I've tried. Unfortunately I'm the type of person who by not looking after my weight made me more top heavy, if you catch my drift. So it pretty much backfired.

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20 hours ago, CitrusFriend said:

Also YMBAI you seemed to be the only person who thought that dating was pointless in middle school because the end goal of dating is to get married, (which is also just something that people do because everyone else does it) and there is an extremely small chance of marrying someone you date in middle school. Then you find out that people don’t date with marriage in mind they just... like dating people. Then you are even more confused.

Yes, this. I even think that about dating in high school.

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21 hours ago, CitrusFriend said:

YMBAI when you were younger you wondered if you ever had a crush and decide to take a quiz online. When the first question asks about how you feel around “him/her” you think “Wait, I’m supposed to have someone specific in mind?!?” 

Or maybe that your first reaction to the concept of "the one" is WTF.
 

21 hours ago, CitrusFriend said:

Also YMBAI you seemed to be the only person who thought that dating was pointless in middle school because the end goal of dating is to get married, (which is also just something that people do because everyone else does it) and there is an extremely small chance of marrying someone you date in middle school. Then you find out that people don’t date with marriage in mind they just... like dating people. Then you are even more confused. 

Dating for it's own sake is the only way it's ever interested me.
It meaning a way to end up "going steady", "in a relationship", get married, etc. makes no sense. Since I'm not interested in any of those things.

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  • 3 weeks later...
20 hours ago, Lovely said:

When you think aesthetic attraction is having a crush on someone 

Ditto for sensual and/or sexual attraction.

Though I'm sure this can happen to allos too.

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When I was in junior high, a girl had invited me to sit with her friends one day at lunch. In the middle of this interaction, she said to me, "I love you, do you love me?" There was one word in my head at that time.......AWKWARD! (I don't even think I gave her a response!)

 

Over time, as I have replayed that scenario in my head, I've been thinking about how I could have responded. Looking back, I've been thinking that it would've been wise to say something along the lines of..."When you say 'love', what do you mean? There are multiple types of love; romantic, platonic, familial and (my favorite) spiritual love."

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  • 1 month later...

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