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I am trying to settle on whether or not I experience romantic attraction. I've had a couple of possible crushes so I'm going to list what they were like and let you guys help me out.

 

-I wanted them to cuddle with me and stuff.

-I felt really happy around them and felt a jolt when they touched me. (I may be touch starved though.)

-I did not feel very jealous or heartbroken if they had a partner.

-I didn't actually want to be in a romantic relationship, although it could be because I tell myself I'm not ready for one.

-I wanted to be really close friends.

-I wanted to engage in meaningful activities and conversations.

 

So what do you think? Crush or plush (platonic & sensual attraction)? I am open to ideas, and although I currently identify as Quoiromantic, I would like to narrow things down if possible. I've also considered alterous before, but I don't quite understand it.

 

Also, if anyone has similar experiences with "crushes" please share so I'm not alone. :P

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Reading this felt like you were describing me and my feelings haha :D

 

Sounds more like a plush to me personally, from my understanding people who get crushes are very jealous and heartbroken once their crush gets into a relationship :)

 

I feel like you can label yourself whatever you want or you don't label yourself at all. I know it'd be nice to have an exact description of what you feel like and where that places you on the spectrum but at the end of the day everyone experiences things in a different way :D

Don't pressure yourself to much, crush or plush doesn't really matter as long as you are happy -_-

(Sorry if there are spelling mistakes, I hope you understand what I mean haha :rofl:)

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@QuirkyGeek I don't think anything in that list would necessarily imply a (romantic) crush. Pretty sure I've also experienced every point on your list in relation to some previous "possible crushes" that, in light of my recent discoveries regarding aromantic identities, I've since mentally re-categorised as "probably not actually crushes" (more just, "oh, this person seems ineresting and [in my case, not yours, I guess] is sexually attractive, so it'd be cool to get to know them better..." kinda stuff).

 

Out of curiosity, do you get these "possible crushes" for any particular gender? Mine were all for girls, go figure :P

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16 hours ago, Aava said:

Sounds more like a plush to me personally, from my understanding people who get crushes are very jealous and heartbroken once their crush gets into a relationship :)

 

I feel like you can label yourself whatever you want or you don't label yourself at all.

Yup this sounds about right. I always got very happy when my 'crush' entered into a relationship (not with me) because it meant they were happy, I would even ship them with people or encourage them to persue a crush they might have. From what I hear now that's rather close to the opposite of most people's crush experience. I wanted to be there for them, support them, and be all they needed in a friend. Nothing more or less.

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