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Costati

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Everything posted by Costati

  1. A bathtub with windows for aesthetic ...but with no glass
  2. I'd rather be friend with the pope than get married (this game is fun)
  3. Jojoooo I don't watch it but my brother is a fan and made me watch some episodes it seems to be really funny. I'm not that much into anime so I probably won't watch it but I'll definetely read your fics about it. Also like arokaladin said organizing a gen event is seriously so so cool especially if you're shy. It's really big so kudos to you and also welcooom on the forum you're finally free of arophobes yeaaaay
  4. Woah I feel you so much on this feeling of belonging, thinking you can't find other aros in real and not understanding social medias. Like honestly I remember really well at thirteen seriously not getting why people were so obsessed with facebook. It just doesn't make sense. I only like skype because it's basically sms but on computers. I'm for sure gonna check your stories and your tumblr I really don't get how tumblr work but I'll make some efforts for some aro content. I can't wait to read your stories tho. I've always wanted to find some but I've been afraid it would be bad and offensive at least if it's from someone aro there probably won't be any problems on that part. Welcooooome
  5. Hello to you I'm really glad that you found out about aromanticism. You dont have to feel like something's wrong with you anymore <3
  6. Oh my god the faking it thing I feel all the time. Even till this day I have these phases where I think I'm faking being an aromantic to be "edgy". And rationally I know how dumb it is for me to think like that because every signs and every experiences ever point to me being obviously aromantic. And when I heard what aromanticism was I was so damn sure. It's objectively obvious that I am but sometimes I doubt about it and just about everything I feel like maybe I'm convinced of it because I'm just a really really good faker. In french it's called the impostor syndrom when you think you're a faker and that truly you're could be the opposite of what you think you are and you feel like the approbation of others people is what's gonna make you truly sûre of something and be valid. That's honestly a crazy thing but yeah I feel you on that. I think like the person before said if you even feel like you need to question your gender it's probably not for nothing. I for exemple have this impostor syndrome thing going on in my life and I didn't ever doubt about my gender (and I doubt about so.much things all the time). I'm a cis woman I never felt the need to wonder if I'm something more even when I talked to a lot of trans people around me their experience just never echoed in me. I think that you're probably questioning it and are interested by this concept because in the end it echoed in you. That's probably not for nothing. Anyway welcome here and good luck on your path to discovering yourself
  7. Oh I feel you so much on that. I can't recall how many guys I dated because I just didn't know what to do. I really liked them and didn't want to hurt them so I just said yes a lot and forced myself into it. Dating was just such an uncomfortable experience for me and when I was in a relationship I was starting to be afraid my partner would want to spend some time with me when all I wanted was to be alone in my room listening to some music. I hated the hand stuff too. One time I punched a Guy by accident when he try to sneakily take my hand when I didn't know he was there. I really had the chance tho to never have experienced kissing when I was in a relationship (except on dares) because I've always made it clear I hated physical contact (never liked even with my parents so I just thought I had some issues with that not that it was due to aromanticism) so the guys I was with always respected that (I mean they probably heard about the time I punched that dude for holding my hand so that made them respect my decision probably). The worst part for me was the I love you it was just so damn awkward when someone said it to me. Especially if we've been dating for two weeks I get that for teenagers it's faster but that was just really Weird to me and I had no idea what I was supposed to say. Thanks is impolite apparently so I'll just go by awkward silence. I don't think that's really better. I also know the insults. I've been called cold and a heartless bitch so many times. At the time I just rolled with it. I must have been for not having the ability to reciprocate ever. Anyway welcome to youuuu hope that now that you know you won't have to feel pressured into that because it's honestly the worst.
  8. Thank you <3 that's seriously really nice of you to say I hope I'll like it on the forum too x)
  9. Helloooo welcome here from a newbie to another What kind of music do you like?
  10. Hello welcome here. I'm huge newbie to everything so I can't really guide you and be reassuring. I don't even know what AVEN is But welcome anyway and you knit? I've never actually heard of anyone apart from movie that likes knitting. It's a pretty cool passion. I've never tried myself but it seems like it could be a relaxing hobby.
  11. Thank you so much for your kind words <3 .It's Nice to hear (or more read in that case). I really hope I can learn to accept myself soon enough
  12. It's actually a pretty funny thing to think about but when I was a child in.... I don't really know how school work in the US system but I guess it's preschool before primary school and anyway that's when I had my first kiss because I remember really well getting actually mad at people who were acting so childish saying "Oooh oooh they like each other they're gonna kiss ooooh" and teasing about Kissing to some other kids and I was pissed because the "couple" were ashamed and reacted like it was embarassing and getting mad and I remember really well saying "But seriously what's the big deal about it kissing doesn't mean anything. I could kiss like him (the random guy next to me) and it doesn't mean that I care" somebody dared me and I actually did with the tongue per request of the person giving me the dare. I was so young and it is so funny to think about looking back. Already at that age I seriously didn't see the appeal.
  13. Hello everyone, I'm really bad at introducing myself because I never know how to start or where to go but I guess the first thing to say is that I'm aromantic. I was born in France and am still currently living in France. I'm a cis female. I'm 18 years old. I'm heterosexual, precocious and I lack of a lot of confidence about my romanticism (well basically everything but mostly that). I've decided to join a forum because I've realised how much I'm actually scared of people not understand I'm like that when it's so important to me. I've been starting a new therapy like two weeks ago and my therapist gave me an exercice to write down all of my fears in life in order of importance to just now what we should talk about and I almost wrote everything but I couldn't write the fear that I have of people not understanding I'm aromantic because I kept thinking about how her reaction would be and how she would tell me something is wrong with me and it's because I'm traumatised that I needed to be fixed. So I've realised how much I needed to actually feel I don't know valid about that and to be able to talk about it, to learn about other people experiences and be able to be proud of this instead of scared. I've been raised by two really alloromantics parents but like honestly probably not healthily romantics parents. They always put their relationship in the center of everything and always praised love. I can't tell you the number of times they told me about how they met and how it was love at first sight and I've told them about me being aromantic and they try to understand but they don't. I feel like it's so stupid. Because like I'm heterosexuel and cis...I'm just aromantic and I don't feel valid being hurt by it. I just don't feel valid in general. I rationally know that I am because I've never dreamed about love and since a very early age I've never understood why my friends would care about boys and having a boyfriend when they had a lot of friends because I've never seen the appeal but I still sometimes doubt about it. It's not even that I really doubt about it it's just that I am actually legit terrified that people tell me I'm actually not that what I am is not that because except from like knowing I love music and I'm precocious that's the only thing I really know about myself. I just felt so valid for once in my life when I learnt I was not broken. I didn't know about any of this about romantic orientation before my best friend told me about. I don't think it was even for me but she just randomly told me "Oh do you know about romanticism" and I checked and I was "Oh wow that's me". And I don't know I've actually known what aromanticism is for a year now and I still don't feel like I'm valid because in life I am not able to feel valid if it doesn't come from me. It's kinda stupid but anyway that's why I'm here I guess...to find that validation and reassure myself because it's so important for me and I feel like it's ridiculous for me to find it so important but maybe you guys can get why? Or maybe it's just me who's really weird and in an existential crisis 24/7.
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