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Costati

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Status Replies posted by Costati

  1. My ex(from when I thought I was alloromo) told me that she still loved me and that the reason she broke up with her recent girlfriend was in order to be with me but because around the same time I had just figured out I was aro and came out to her, she had kept quiet about it until now and currently I kinda wanna punch a brick wall because my aro ass is taken by my lovely qpp and is not ready for this romance bs. 

    1. Costati

      Costati

      So she knows you're aro but broke up with her girlfriend un the hope of being in a romantic relationship with you ? Or did I get this wrong..because it's sound super rude of her said in that way.

    2. (See 2 other replies to this status update)

  2. Maybe I'm materialistic because stuff is more reliable than people... 🤔

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Nah that's just being smart and practical.

    2. (See 2 other replies to this status update)

  3. I just recieved my aro flag and it's so pretty and huuuge and I am so happy. It was a pain to have it down and made me really anxious but damn am I happy of the result. It is so awesooooome. I've never felt more proud of being aro. I wanna use it as a cape and wave it in everyone's faces like a queeen ♥

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Maybe I'll take a pic to put it as my avatar. We'll see x) 

    2. (See 2 other replies to this status update)

  4. This thing turned up in my Dreamwidth subscription page. A comm that initially looked promising- a writing/art fest that would go toward promoting diversity. They even split sexual and romantic orientations. The misstep here (and misstep is putting things lightly) is that they decided to put in a BLEEPing points system for participating. Dead serious, here's a link. I feel that cheapens the message, and am seriously considering a calling out for the admin, and an angry rant on my personal Dreamwidth journal.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Wow yes do that. It's really f**ked. I get that the idea is to motivate people into putting more diversity but that's really wrong. You can't say that some sexual orientations or romantic orientations deserve less points than others. Strangely it mostly bothers me for mental disorder. Because I guess for the other things I can understand a bit it's about representation but for mental disorder it's honestly insulting it's like saying someone with OCD, anxiety or PTSD struggles less than someone with an eating disorder (and I have all four so I am in a position to say they're all equally making my life hell.) It also varies a lot on the level someone can have a really bad case of OCD in the way it really stop them from functioning healthily when I for example doesn't have it in that form. Same for anxiety. My best friend have really frequent panic attacks and social anxiety when for me it's somatic meaning it creates physical pain and insomnia (and other things) from all the stress that I interiorize. And it's the same for physical disability btw who are they to say that amputation is better than epilepsy. That's so weird. If they want to give people kudos for putting more diversity that's great but put everything on the same score. You can't just judge what deserves more points. I completely get that you're angry. And you really need to at least explain how this is so wrong because I think the author really don't realize the issue because they're stuck in their perspective and how in their heads they're really trying to do their best to motivate people to include more diversity.

    2. (See 1 other reply to this status update)

  5. I hate having dry skin.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      I feel you I have oily skin and it's really a pain too. People with combination skin must be living the dream somewhere while we all suffer :(

  6. And like, I guess there's always the gen Jojo server, but it's so small... We only have about four, maybe five actual active members, two of whom are more like semi-active... :(

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Oh well that's great you created a fandom that a five members that's already awesome. Even if it's not as big as you wanted it's still a huge achievement. Don't lose hope. I'm sure you can get more following. Try recruiting new members to the fandom ?

    2. (See 3 other replies to this status update)

  7. And like, I guess there's always the gen Jojo server, but it's so small... We only have about four, maybe five actual active members, two of whom are more like semi-active... :(

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Can't you try to create another server, your own with all people from all Jojo servers ? That's gonna be some work but at least if you lead it it'll be inclusive x)

    2. (See 3 other replies to this status update)

  8. I wish aro socks existed. But nobody wants to acknowledge us in their cutesy pride merch.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      @Naegleria fowleri I love this. And the shipping cost aren't that high. Thank you so much I'm gonna rock that pride. 

    2. (See 3 other replies to this status update)

  9. I wish aro socks existed. But nobody wants to acknowledge us in their cutesy pride merch.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Yeess thank you for saying that. I've had to custom make my own flag like I was a corporation because I couldn't find any aro flags on site that sells pride merch. And the logo needs to be approved by employees so people that I don't know are gonna have to discuss with me about my logo and the proportion and everything. It doesn't make me anxiouus at aaaaall. I shouldn't have to go to this trouble to be able to be properly proud at a pride. It really sucks.

    2. (See 3 other replies to this status update)

  10. today i learnt that my mum is not accepting of aro/ace people. good to know. won't come out to her about it now that i know she won't understand or accept me.

     

     

    i feel empty and lost.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      I'm sorry for you :( I'm sending you a ton of virtual hugs <3 If you like them, if not think of virtual cookies they're cool too.

    2. (See 4 other replies to this status update)

  11. also today in my adolescent literature class i had an epiphany: i've found myself relating to/projecting onto/even writing so many fewer female characters than male characters for multiple reasons, but there was one piece i was always missing: romance/falling in love/being motherly or nurturing are such INTEGRAL parts of so many narratives written for girls and women, even some held up as feminist icons, while there are many more male characters who either evade the romance narrative entirely or their personal narratives aren't totally centered around it.

     

    feminism has failed me! and that's the tea.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Yes exactly I have so many issues with that and especially that to counter-balance that every female character that I have are so opposed to romance and really independent and all when I don't have this issue with male character. Some of them aren't interest in romance but some are really romantic but it doesn't bother me as much. I'm so glad somebody noticed that.

  12. AJNXJWJDKQKDA at 7 AM i was sleeping and my roommate finally came back after a night of partying and a guy on our floor was putting her to bed (even though she could walk herself but okay) and then i heard them kissing for a solid 30 seconds and he was like "goodnight" (it's 7 AM my dude the SUN IS RISING) and said something and she goes "i love you too" and he leaves ajdhwjdkkwkd she's been off-and-on hating and loving this guy all year and i know they thought i was sleeping but my romance repulsed ass was SCREAMING and now i feel like i'm harboring a dirty secret SOS my aro ass doesn't deserve this

    1. Costati

      Costati

      @Cavalier080854 Except that there is a huge difference between respecting, be tolerant to people forgiving an slowly letting yourself fade for the better good of society. Nobody is saying to impose values and attitudes on other people but you can't let others impose values and attitudes on you either because you're 1% against 99%. 

    2. (See 5 other replies to this status update)

  13. AJNXJWJDKQKDA at 7 AM i was sleeping and my roommate finally came back after a night of partying and a guy on our floor was putting her to bed (even though she could walk herself but okay) and then i heard them kissing for a solid 30 seconds and he was like "goodnight" (it's 7 AM my dude the SUN IS RISING) and said something and she goes "i love you too" and he leaves ajdhwjdkkwkd she's been off-and-on hating and loving this guy all year and i know they thought i was sleeping but my romance repulsed ass was SCREAMING and now i feel like i'm harboring a dirty secret SOS my aro ass doesn't deserve this

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Don't get involved into their dramas. Even if they try to force you into it. You need to take a step back and see how stupidly ridiculous their whole thing is and discretely roll your eyes when they get back together or when they break up again. Sometimes people need drama in their love life and it can be so ridiculous it's start to be funny. Imagine you're in Friends and they're Ross and Rachel their "love" story is a running gag in the show.

    2. (See 5 other replies to this status update)

  14. why are there goddamn thirteen year olds on tumblr with aesthetic blogs labelling themselves as aphobes like it makes them cool that's a) horrifying and b) embarassing

    1. Costati

      Costati

      I didn't know about that. It's depressing. I hate when some serious issues are being cutyfied or trendified by younger people. It's like the insult "retarded". It's a serious mental illness that makes life hard for a lot of people stop saying it like it's hyper degrading and negative. That's like gay also...a lot of time young people say "What are you gay or something" like it's the most mean thing they could think about when clearly it's not. There's nothing wrong with being gay or mentally retarded or aro either (obviously). It's overall very sad that hate and negativity is seen as being "cool" and "trendy" for younger people. I hope one day it will change and the cool kids would be the one that are really nice to everyone and are admired for being true to themselves and really brave. 

    2. (See 1 other reply to this status update)

  15. wish I could... talk about aro issues in real life without feeling like an attention seeking embarrassment...

    1. Costati

      Costati

      @Zorcodtoa Wow your mum sounds so much like mine. They would probably be great friends if mine wasn't so uninterested and repulsed by friendships.

    2. (See 3 other replies to this status update)

  16. I just got asked out on a date. Though I knew it was coming and that he would eventually ask, I still feel unprepared. I do not want to go on a date with him or anything like that, but saying "no" apparently isn't working, considering this is the third time he's suggested being more than friends. To be honest, I don't even want to be friends with him in the first place.

     

    This sucks.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      That's so sad that this guy ils trying to guilt trip you into a relationship. Like okay you're sad so what you're gonna pressure someone (and an aro at that) in a relationship they'll clearly feel sad about because I guess if it's someone other than you who's sad that's okay ?! What is wrong with people (and mostly men because I've never actually seen or heard about a girl doing that) that think they deserve us because...they're sad (or sometimes it's because they've been nice to us..beeing nice to someone is not doing nice things for them in hope they will bang you in return...that's just called being a manipulative d-bag ). This is such a stupid mentality. Good on you for being strong about it :aroicecream:

    2. (See 2 other replies to this status update)

  17. I just got asked out on a date. Though I knew it was coming and that he would eventually ask, I still feel unprepared. I do not want to go on a date with him or anything like that, but saying "no" apparently isn't working, considering this is the third time he's suggested being more than friends. To be honest, I don't even want to be friends with him in the first place.

     

    This sucks.

    1. Costati

      Costati

      Send him this song: 

       
      It's not the most polite thing to do but if he keeps asking you and making you uncomfortable when you clearly said no that's called harassment and that's a serious issue that you don't have to go through. Guys can't except you to respect them when they're clearly not respecting you and this song is also really cool and I'm really glad for it. Because for once we have the friendzone from the point of view of the person who friendzone and not the other way around.

    2. (See 2 other replies to this status update)

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