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About aro_elise

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    fashion design student
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  1. Aromantic Product

    i went to the website and this thing popped up: 'aromantic notifications'. my immediate thought was to caption it with something like 'when i'm reminded forcibly of how aro i am'. you know when allos do or say something and your brain is just like ~aromantic notification~?
  2. my dad uses the phrase 'garden variety' to describe anything typical or mundane and i kind of picked it up.
  3. poll on relationships

    idk man. i don't really have a plan because i'm happy being single. if a promising opportunity comes up, ok, but i'm not really looking for anything. kind of the same with new friends, i just let it happen organically, which often means nothing happens, but i'd rather be by myself than with someone i don't actually really like.
  4. Aromanticism and depression

    @NullVector yeah, that sounds about right. i mean, sometimes it is really bad, like i feel broken and despairing, rather than empty, and it's not just mood; it's hard to do anything. school stuff, basic self care, even fun stuff, it's like i'm too tired for life. but that's pretty typical of all types of depression. i was diagnosed about a year ago but i've had these symptoms for about 3 years. i've known i was aro for over 2 years. and fun fact: one of the worst times in my life in terms of depression was during my first and only relationship, when i was basically trying to convince myself i wasn't aro. it was...not good. last year was pretty bad, too--my first year of university--i was used to not having trouble with school and everything being the same, i guess, and then nothing was familiar or easy and i just kind of lost it. i've tried therapy and medication--variously--but didn't notice any significant change, so i currently have neither. this year...i'm not far enough into it to tell, but it's relatively ok so far.
  5. poll on relationships

    i'm completely aro and unsure about qprs. if i were to enter into one or more (i'm poly), it would be a sort of a friends with benefits situation. there would have to be a fair amount of both platonic and sexual attraction, otherwise it would be a friendship or a hookup, respectively, not that i'm at all opposed to either of those. my hypothetical qpp(s) would pretty much have to be aro, i think. i've been in a relationship with an allo and it was, well, disastrous. i guess i'm open to trying again now that i know myself--my aromanticism--better, but i'm sure not going to go looking for a situation like that. under ideal circumstances like those i described, i'm favourable to the idea.
  6. i don't care about anyone's opinion or expectations except my own. even my best friend, who's the most important person in my life: of course i want her to love me, but i know she does, so...that's that, you know? i don't try to impress anyone; if they don't like me for who i am, i don't want them to like a false version of myself. i don't think it's related at all to my aromanticism but it might be to a couple other things. one is my dysthymia: a type of chronic depression, characterized in part by muted emotions and in my case, at least, not caring much about anything. the other is my mom (yeah, now we're starting to sound more like the psychological stereotype): for most of my life, she emotionally abused me. let me just say, i believe it was unintentional, even after i told her repeatedly how i felt, and other than that, she's a very good parent. i know it doesn't make sense; i'm not going to explain in detail because that would take a long time and you still wouldn't understand, but basically i learned not to let it bother me. yeah, she still picks on me sometimes (i'm 19) and it does bother me sometimes, but hey, i have feelings. i just realize it's pointless to get upset and fight with her. i tell her i don't need whatever criticism she's offering and tell myself it's okay. just move on. and i'm not one of those people who believes in the idea that shit like this makes you a better person; i don't know how emotionally strong i would be without it, and i don't care. anyway, of course my former therapist hinted that she thought this was at least in part the cause of both my depression and my aromanticism, but again, even if i believed that (i don't), what does it matter? this was not the reason for my decision to stop seeing her, but it didn't help. sorry, that did more than answer your question, but i hope it did that.
  7. Why I Identify with Aro-Spec.

    same, outside of the lgbt+ community and even sometimes in it, 'aromantic' is so, like, unheard of, but among us aro-specs, compared to all the other prefixes, it seems so simple.
  8. Romantic zone

    i call it 'date zone'. it hasn't exactly happened to me; my friend confessed his romantic attraction to me even knowing i'm aro. i accepted his offer for a date (dinner) but made it clear it wouldn't change anything. about half a year later, we're still friends and he has a girlfriend. often you just have to wait a fairly short time for their attraction to pass.
  9. Aro -pride animal ?

    courtesy: kirstendraws.tumblr.com
  10. Aro/Ace puns

    my last name is code. my mom's maiden name was arro. it's estonian--pronounced with a long 'a' like army. she didn't keep it but for the purposes of this, she's an arro-code and i'm an aro code. and this is more of a joke than a pun but i love it. pretty much any tennis player, like me, has heard the joke "never date a tennis player; to them, love means nothing". (when calling the score, 'love' means 0.) i think you see where i'm going with this.
  11. Fanfiction...

    i actually made a post about my fanfiction frustrations here: http://www.arocalypse.com/forums/topic/1157-romance-in-media/?tab=comments#comment-33454.
  12. Shipping

    i ship in the sense that i imagine the sort of relationships for characters or people which i would want: platonic and sexual. my friend actually asked me this, if i was aro, why did i ship people? and that's my answer: they seem great together, in a non-romantic way. maybe a romantic way too, i can't tell, doesn't matter. my otp is phan (dan and phil). before even getting into sexual or romantic possibilities, their friendship is incredible and it's clear that they love each other very much. it's beautiful. and yeah, ok, sometimes i ship people in a purely sexual way. i'm a fujoshi, i see two hot guys (or more--i'm poly) and brain goes "picture this...". i realize this is sketchy territory but even if i ever met any of these people (actually, i have), i wouldn't mention it. fanfiction and fantasies, my friends.
  13. Aromantic Character Headcanons

    i think he could be gray or demi. but my all-time favourite hc is luna lovegood as aro/ace. i don't even think it requires explanation.
  14. i'm your garden variety sexual aro. i can be sexually attracted to guys and platonically attracted to anyone. when they coincide, i call it an aro crush. most of those are on celebrities. i get occasional squishes; i have one now.
  15. Aromanticism and depression

    i've never thought they were related. part of dysthymia (the type of depression i have) is dull emotions, feeling empty a lot. but one of the few things which does bring me strong emotion is the love i have for my friends. it's overwhelming sometimes. so i'm not a sociopath, yay. i do love and care for people, just not romantically, and i don't see why that would matter.