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LBMango

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About LBMango

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    Member

Personal Information

  • Name
    Lizard Bench Mango
  • Gender
    Male
  • Pronouns
    He/him
  • Romanticism
    Aro
  • Sexuality
    Hetero

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  1. Not me, but at the ace meetup I was at at a con (mentioned in another post of mine) a kid (probably 14?) said "[they] somehow manage to be flamboyantly gay, even though they are ace-aro" I liked the phrasing. It doesn't describe me, but I liked it...
  2. I should mention that the moderators were totally welcoming, and understood my discomfort, etc. But yeah... Also, I was able to put in a plug for arocalypse (although I think I pronounced it aropocalypse... hopefully people can find it...)
  3. I was at a science fiction/lifestyle convention this weekend (Arisia in Boston) and there was a meeting that was listed as an asexuality, and a-spec gathering. Aro was listed in the description, so I went. However, as a non-ace aro, I felt really out of place. I was diametrically opposite the majority of people in the room, who were romantic ace. There were some ace-aro as well. I was the only allo-aro there... Have others had this kind of experience? Is there a better way to go about that? or do we just need to find more people to create our own groups?
  4. And even worse: Sometimes they make you pick sides! WTF?
  5. I have been accused of flirting when I didn't know it... Seeing as how I'm aro, I still think I wasn't, but she was pretty sure that I was... It's a bit like negging I guess? I don't understand negging to begin with... (do they even have Pick-Up-Artists in your region? If you don't know what "negging" is... you're probably happier that way...)
  6. Yep. that. As an allo aro, but also someone who has a very hard time reading other people (and also someone who didn't understand that aro was a thing into his mid 40's) I can say that being in a satisfying sexual relationship seems extremely unlikely... However, to differ with Jot-Aro, I think I WOULD like a FWB set up... at least if we were ACTUALLY good friends... Or, I've considered looking into the poly community, where, if I can't satisfy all of a partner's needs, there are others who can do that... I'm not sure if that's a Thing either... but maybe?
  7. In American English, at least, I would distinguish between a Relationship, and a relationship... you have a relationship with your coworkers, your business contacts, your barista. You probably don't have a Relationship with them... A Relationship is one of the more primary relationships you have... so you can have a Relationship with your best friend... Then again, as discussed above, it looks like the definition of "platonic" is also in question... so ... Language is hard? Yeah, I'm going to just say "language is hard" and leave it at a hard "maybe?".
  8. I think it would depend on what they MEAN by the term... since it seems kind of contradictory to my understanding of the usage of those words, I'm not sure what information they're trying to impart... Is it: bi/pan, but strongly tending towards lesbian? or: Bi/pan romantic, lesbian sexual (or vice versa)? or: Bi/pan, but lesbian sounds cooler? If it's the last one, then, yeah, I'd say it's maybe harmful. The middle one, is/are not harmful. The 1st one... maybe? (Note: I don't think it's the 3rd one, I just put that in there for completeness)
  9. Life is a phase. As are all things that happen during it... A label is not a legal contract with responsibilities and requirements, and you have to get a lawyer to sign something if you change your mind. By that, I mean: Call yourself whatever feels accurate to you now. If you decide that was wrong, or how you feel changes, change then. Welcome.
  10. I normally really like SMBC (Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal), but today's comic: http://smbc-comics.com/comic/machine-love both implies that romantic love is intrinsic to humans, AND that sex = romance.... Or am I just thinking too hard?
  11. Sennkestra, you are, of course, right. One should never assume that anyone has it easier than yourself... that was poor judgement on my part...
  12. What Jot-Aro said. Plus since I'm not ace, it took longer for me to realize that I wasn't "normal"... I knew I was heterosexual, and that's the term that most people think about, so it sort of got left at that, and I assumed that the things that I didn't experience weren't actually there, and were just invented for fiction, exaggerated, etc. I would imagine (projecting here) that it's harder for an aro-ace to not notice that they aren't allo... I'm less sure how aroness interacts with other non-a-sexualities...
  13. I think that it's both of these. I have very frequently have a very strong reaction to toxic positivity. So, that's part of the problem. Also, my primary love language is touch, which, for men in American culture, at least, is pretty much limited to romantic relationships...
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