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About Mark

  • Rank
  • Birthday October 17

Personal Information

  • Name
  • Gender
    Gender Queer
  • Pronouns
    They, Mx
  • Location
    United Kingdom
  • Occupation
  • Romanticism
    aromantic: couple and romance repulsed.
  • Sexuality
    pansexual, kinky, Relationship Anarchist

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  1. Mark

    Marriage Abolition

    The discrimination arises from the state treating married and unmarried people differently. Altering the definition of "married" changes only who experiences this discrimination. I've yet to hear how it's possible to have both legal equality and legal marriage.
  2. Mark

    Marriage Abolition

    Matrimonial law is the only category of law which currently applies to relationships. Whilst it may resemble contract law it is something else. It would be necessary to either alter matrimonial law to operate like contract law or alter contract law to be applicable to relationships. Both of these involve complex legislative changes. That cultural shift is happening already. In common with the rest of the industrialised world the proportion of married people in the US population has been falling for decades. It's easier to abolish laws than alter them.
  3. My feeling is that AVEN was specifically set up by and for allo aces. It also also seems that TAAAP along with aces & aros are asexual organisations attempting to look aro inclusive. In the process being quite arophobic, especially towards aro allos. IME aro aces seem somewhat split around if they regard aro or ace as being more important. Even in a romantic and sexual relationship the romantic part is quite public whereas the sexual part is generally private. The concept of a romantic relationship without sex is not unknown. e.g. Waiting until after marriage before having sex.
  4. Mark

    Marriage Abolition

    Considering that amantonormativity was first used in a book entitled "Minimising Marriage" it's highly relevant. Since abolition is an extreme form of minimisation. This has two serious issues. 1) Extending the definition of marriage to be applicable beyond (socially) monogamous couples is legally complex. Whereas extending from just hetero couples to all such couples is fairly trivial. Requiring little or no legislative changes. e.g. the USA made this change through the judicial arm of government. 2) Legal marriage is mutually exclusive with legal equality. Minimising the scope of legal marriage (or abolishing the concept entirely) is, I feel, the only route towards a more equal and less discriminatory society.
  5. I think the option I would sleep with someone I considered only a "friend" might not be worded the best way. Since to many aros friendship is a more desirable type of relationship than romance.
  6. Mark

    A Carnival of Aros

    Thank you for helping out here. Though it is a pity that the people involved with this are not contributing to this thread themselves.
  7. I'm not sure that this, since they are still separating the children by Gender Assigned At Birth. A simpler option would be to have all of the children use hammers, do manicures, etc together.
  8. Mark

    Allow personals/dating requests?

    I think "personal ad" is good generic term which covers looking for "dates", "partners" or "relationships" of any kind. Different one, with "Meetup" being for events rather than personals.
  9. I think you mean "Demisexual", rather than "Demiromantic".
  10. Mark

    Allow personals/dating requests?

    IMHO all of the things people do on "dates" are romantic coded. There are terms like "friends date", "mates date", even "masturdate" so a date need not be romantic. Relationship anarchy dosn't preclude having specific relationship aspirations in mind. Indeed seeking pen pals or QPR would be examples of that.
  11. With "monogamy" meaning all of "sexual monogamy", "emotional monogamy", "social monogamy" and "activity monogamy". Together with cohabitation and financial entanglement/merger. As described by the "relationship escalator" model. Wanting sex within the context of a substantially different relationship stricture is "more wrong" than not wanting it at all. Ditto for wanting it without a meaningful, loving or emotionally connected relationship. An analogy would be that it may be easier to be an atheist in a highly monotheistic society than following a different god/gods whilst considering the socially approved god to be part of a pantheon.
  12. I think the vice versa situations equivalent to a gay person experiencing a crush or lush on a straight person certainly is possible between allos and aros. With possibly even more mutual misunderstanding. With allos likely to misinterpret anything not purely platonic as romantic interest. Whilst completely missing the irony of the queer community advocating diversity when it comes to sexual orientation, but "one size fits all" in terms of relationships.
  13. This sounds like some heavy stereotyping. There's also the complication that weird, nerdy and autistic people may be desexualised. Something which can also happen, to a lessor extent, with those who are shy or introverted. Thus may mistakenly believe they are asexual. IME fetishisation and desexualisation can happen to the same person. Especially to trans people.
  14. It might be better described as "tolerated". I suspect the actual demographic is narrower, excluding many "straight young men". If anything being interested in non-romantic sexual connections and relationships is seen as worst than "no strings". Do you mean "feminists" or "TERFs"? It's also often the case that "The enemy of my enemy is my friend" turns out to be quite untrue. Similarly many allo allos do want casual sex, hook ups, fuck buddies, etc. I'm sure that for, at least some of, these people a sexual non-romantic relationship is as as difficult to handle as a romantic relationship is for many aros. Even a lot of non-monogamous sub cultures can be highly couple and romance centric, at least IME. I'd agree very much about the language issue.
  15. Mark

    A Carnival of Aros

    I feel that the sort of things I have to say would not be positive. Especially about TAAAP and aces & aros.