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Tagor

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About Tagor

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  • Gender
    male
  • Romanticism
    aro (I think?)
  • Sexuality
    heterosexual

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  1. I personally probably would have thought "Oh, an ace gathering" and stayed away. As a white cis male heterosexual romance neutral aro I haven't experienced much discrimination (yet) and probably "look" completely straight. I would just have gotten looked at and wouldn't have known what to talk about anyway.
  2. @asexualpanda27 I just wanted to say that I basically feel exactly the same
  3. Well, mesaging these organisations and asking on how they would like to threat ASAW would be something everybody could do. An organization like AUREA could also offer help and pre-written articles. But I haven't been in the queer community long enough to know if this would be a valid approach.
  4. For further reading, there's also this thread, which asked the same questions some years ago.
  5. I stumbled across the term in a twitter bio and thought it was interesting. I researched (googled) it, and after a detour over AVEN I found this forum and began reading.
  6. I agree with bydontost and nonmerci. I already know I don't feel extreme romantic attraction, I wouldn't be here thinking about being aro if I would. It's way more interesting to see what the median romantic experience is, as as this a more sensible value to compare against. Just looking at the extreme is like trying to to determine how low you are by just looking at mount Everest in comparison. You won't good results, as most places are just "really far down" from this point of view.
  7. I think it is really hard to tell, but I would tend towards cupioromantic. At least according to my understanding, if you're lithromantic you really do have a crush on somebody which just fades really fast once you're in a relationship. To me, your experience sounds more like liking the idea of having a partner (somebody, not specifically someone you have a crush on). Also, in questions about whether something is roamantic love I personally tend to go with the one without romantic love, reasoning that I would know it if it was love, but that's just a decision I made some time ago. But ultimately, you have to decide if you feel romantic love which fades (and are lithromantic) or you don't (and are cupioromantic).
  8. I think it's just a biology thing. When we feel empathy, part of our brain emulates the experience the person we're talking to feels (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy#Neuroscientific_basis_of_empathy. The problem is that with aromantics and allos it's like trying to emulate a quantum compute using a regular computer and the other way round (sorry for using a comparison nobody will understand but I couldn't think of a better one). For some tasks it works just fine, but others are impossible. As we have never felt the emotions of being in love or being heartbroken and our brains just aren't wired to feel it, we can't simulate this emotion in our heads and feel empathy. We can come close by comparing it to something we know, but ultimately we have to fail.
  9. I'd probably say something along the lines of "I think I'm aromantic, here's a link for you to learn more if you want to, but I think a relationship might work, so if it's okay with you I'd like to try a relationship" (Though that's easier said than done). If I was the boy I can't imagine that being that much of a deal breaker to not at least try a relationship (as at least in my opinion more information is always better than less, but this might be my aro perspective on this).
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