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About Cinereus

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    aro, bi-alterous
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  1. Very much this - it took accepting I was ace to accept that I was aro, even when I had been in the larger queer/LGBTQIA+ community for years and hearing the term off and on - other than in the very small aroace pockets of the ace community, it was always mentioned in such shallow, flippant ways that I felt like it couldn't possibly be my experience. I wouldn't consider it for the longest time because I knew so few actual facts about it and had internalized so much stigma around it. I can't imagine how hard it would be to fully consider it, let alone find it, if one wasn't already knee-deep in self-reflection around gender and sexuality - my understanding and acceptance of my aro-ness is so inseparable from how many societal norms I had to unlearn to accept my being trans and bi and ace.
  2. Cinereus


    Thanks! I'm very behind on my reading list at the moment, though I'm hoping to get into The Left Hand of Darkness very shortly once I've finished grad school next month. The book I most recently fell in love with was A Tale for the Time Being by Ruth Ozeki which is very magical realism bordering on fantasy and about the kind of otherworldly connections reading about other people's lives creates - it's beautifully written (though it deals with a lot of tough subjects) and I've been recommending it every time I get the chance!
  3. Cinereus


    Hello! Always nice to meet other pagans, especially other eclectic folks - there's just too many pantheons to choose from!
  4. Cinereus


    Hi all! I'm still feeling my way around the forums but thought I'd throw up a quick intro. I'm Gray/Grayson, though Cinereus is also totally fine. I'm in my mid-twenties and work in the museum field, am neurodivergent, and a queer/bi-alterous aroace nb/trans vaguely-guything who uses he/his pronouns. I've known I was trans for years and years and have been transitioning for a long while now (though for a long time I identified as a binary trans man), but it's taken me a long long time to figure out I was aroace - only since my early twenties really when I was trying "ace" on for size after having my "oh, people aren't joking about experiencing sexual attraction" moment and realized just how little interest I had in relationships in general. Because the experiences are so linked for me I don't really see my aro-ness and ace-ness as separate, but I also see my aromanticism as more pivotal to my identity than my asexuality, which makes ace spaces just vaguely not what I'm looking for. So I was excited to realize an aro forum exists, and that it seems free of all the nonsense that keeps me from wanting to talk about being aroace on tumblr! Besides being a queer disaster, I like hiking, outdoor photography, and creative writing, and in a lot of ways can only relate to romance in the sense of how I feel about landscapes - especially the southwest U.S. deserts where I grew up and the Pacific Northwest where I currently live. I'm a huge reader (lots of sci-fi, fantasy, magical realism, plus history/science/culture nonfiction when the mood strikes) when I'm not buried by work, I like to sew and am learning to do embroidery, and I'm currently a huge nerd for The Adventure Zone. I'm an eclectic pagan, mostly a weird mix of Norse and Kemetic/Egyptian.