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nixian_hound

Member
  • Content count

    7
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About nixian_hound

  • Rank
    Newbie
  • Birthday 02/28/1996

Personal Information

  • Name
    Alice
  • Gender
    Genderfluid -- Xenogender(s), Baph, Demioffgirl, Juxera
  • Pronouns
    it/its or they/them
  • Location
    East Coast USA
  • Romanticism
    Quoiromantic, Orbisian, Medusan, Objectum
  • Sexuality
    Sex-Conflicted; no split attractions
  1. BDSM aro relationships

    I also gotta recommend you talk to your friend about it, but I'm sure that's obvious. I also second making sure you're well-acquainted with Risk-Aware Consent and potential red flags in stuff and how to healthily manage a BDSM relationship if it's not something you're familiar with. I would personally try to approach it by asking if you could have a serious talk for a moment and just ... be honest and upfront about what you're looking for and want and don't want. Set the relationship up not based on what others expect out of it but more what you both are comfortable with. I think a lot of people might be less intimidated if you approach it from a "friends with benefits" angle first and ease into more discussion of aromance if they aren't also aro or arospec, so you could try that? It just seems to be a more familiar concept to others and a good way to start getting others to relate to that idea. And yeah as said above unfortunately most BDSM relationships have some romance involved, but a lot of resources I've seen focus a lot more on the how to do the dynamic thing without necessarily talking about romance so that's. ... something. Best of luck to you!
  2. How are You a 'Bad' Aromantic Spectrum Person?

    - Im quoiromantic and that's kind of the weird one in the aro spectrum - Im not purely 100% aro, for that matter - I don't actually believe there's a romantic/aromantic binary spectrum and everyone is along it somewhere and the only reason there seems to be one is because it's been socially constructed. So the differences and ostracization people feel is legit, it's just something that I feel, like gender, can be fixed and bridged by breaking apart the system of amatonormativity entirely. - I'm in relationships I'd call romantic - Even my platonic relationships look romantic - I've never had problems understanding romance (it's just that I don't understand why certain actions are coded as romantic only) - I like romance - Basically feel like I don't really belong or am included in the arospec even if people say I do/am so I feel kind of like I invade aro spaces bc Im not 100% aro but maybe thats just internalized crap
  3. Feisty Quoiro Here

    that makes perfect sense because that's one philosophy that alterhumanity approaches human identity with, questioning what it even means and how it applies as a social construct. It's interesting something specific to folks who feel nonhuman in a sense due specifically to neurodivergence and not fitting social standards has popped up on its own (as these things really always seem to!) without it crossing over yet. If there's like, websites, blogs, anything about it that would be neat, or is it just kind of a small shared philosophy that doesn't have much tangible presence to point others to?
  4. Some Arospec Questions (For fun) (Part 1?)

    Guess this is a good first topic to reply to? :3 1) What would be a suitable animal mascot for your romantic orientation? I liked the AroPlane Aardvark :3 I also like the idea of a platypus for quoiromantic, because it defies all binaries and classifications to the point of confounding people and making science question itself. That's what I'm all about, son. 2) Would you use 'heartbroken' to describe an aromantic going through relationship related grief? I would, yeah. It's still a matter of the heart, it's still something you feel, so 'heartbroken' absolutely could apply. I think it can apply to a lot of things even beyond relationships. 3) Would you describe a QPR more of a modified friendship or a modified romantic relationship? Or is it it's own thing? I'd absolutely call it it's own thing because it's a part of arospec culture and I think it's reductive and disrespectful to call QPRs *as a phenomenon* anything but their own special sort of relationship. If a person individually feels it's more like "a really committed friendship" or "a romantic relationship lite(tm)" then that's cool and fine. It's just when non-aros pick up the idea that QPRs shouldn't be respected as their own valid sort of relationship. Also the whole friend/romantic partner binary doesn't fit with me so ofc I'd say a QPR is something different. Would the world be better if half the population was aromantic (or on the spectrum) and half was alloromantic? Why? I don't believe in an actual defineable binary between aro and non-aro, especially if you're including all possible arospec experience. There's a lot of folks who would be considered "alloromantic" who might have more aro-spec experiences and just not label them as such. I think everyone has a unique relationship to romantic attraction and there's already diversity of feeling and attraction that just needs to be further encouraged and recognized, and a lot more people might fit across that spectrum than we currently recognize.
  5. Feisty Quoiro Here

    Baph is actually a gender term I coined here. It does come from Baphomet, as the gender feeling itself is very heavily connected to it. I used to call myself an androgyne but talking to other androgynes about what I felt, none of them ever understood or felt the same way? So I just made my own word. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Aha, a bit of a complicated question for me to answer ^^;. I'm a lot of different things, but changeling, drow elf, and wolf are probably the most prominent aspects of my nonhumanity. One *could* call me otherkin/therian/fictionkin, I've been round some of those communities for 10 years now, but I've kind of gravitated toward vaguer labels and alterhumanity (more about that) as a postmodernist look at "human" as a mutable species identity and social construct not limited to being homo sapiens.
  6. Feisty Quoiro Here

    It's alright, I also have a very odd way of speaking (its a schizo-spectrum thing) and use some niche labels so Im always open to clarifying if need be ^^; Glad to have the support though! It's nice to meet you too! Im deeply curious of this voidpunk thing now, what's that? Nice to meet you as well! (I actually saw it in this forum's glossary which was neat :D)
  7. Feisty Quoiro Here

    Hi there! Y'all can call me Alice! Im 22, nonhuman/ nonbinary trans, quoiromantic + schromantic, and orbisian, objectum, and medusan. The way i approach quoiromantic is the same as the way the coiner did, as a complete rejection of the romantic/aromantic binary (and for me, it applies across all attractions, maybe quoiattractional would be more accurate? romance is just most relevant) because the way things are split up and laid out into romantic/sexual/sensual/etc don't make sense or fit me and I don't want to be placed along all these axes anywhere. I also use schromantic because I relate to aromanticism as a concept and culture and my experiences overlap as quoi is part of the 'spectrum' there while also not relating in having experienced attraction I or society would define as romantic. I have a complicated history in toxic asexual communities that further make me want to refuse labeling myself along a non-ace/ace binary and just leave my place there as "It's Complicated." The orbisian, medusan, and objectum bits just mean I love women (not necessarily exclusively just definingly), intelligent nonhumans/alterhuman-IDing people, and "inanimate" objects (who are very much full of life to me). Uhhh been looking for an aromantic space for a long time since AroPlane fell off my radar and hoping this will be a good fit because I've had a real bad run of luck with trying to find spaces and community, unfortunately. I hope this is a good one? Looks neat?
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