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  1. 18 points
    Alternatively, assumed you were bi or pan because you felt equally towards all genders.
  2. 16 points
    Aromantic was added to the dictionary this month: https://www.ksdk.com/mobile/article/news/nation-now/spoiler-alert-binge-watch-impostor-syndrome-added-to-oxford-english-dictionary/465-66a80472-a15b-4586-a1c7-941659a6c249
  3. 12 points
    YMBAI when somebody tries to explain the concept of "friendzone" to you, and you just don't understand what is their problem with that. It sounds amazing. It sounds idyllic, like something you always genuinely wanted. YMBAI romantic relationships seem like a temporary thing, and you don't get it how grown adults believe that they gonna last ⁓forever⁓.
  4. 12 points
    If you have thought your squishes were crushes or have had to make up crushes to fit in.
  5. 11 points
    Something I've noticed about people in romantic relationships, is that the concept of compromise in a relationship can lead to people compromising a piece of themselves. For example, I was once rocking a pair of five inch heels, and my friend loved them. She really wanted a pair of shoes like them, but her boyfriend doesn't like when she's taller than him, so she doesn't wear heels anymore. Or in a more extreme example, my mom has a friend who had a phd in rocket science and worked at nasa. When he married his wife, she didn't like how much time he devoted to work, so he gave all of that up to be a high school teacher. This idea of giving up a piece of yourself so that someone else will love/continue loving you is so alien. I always thought that if anyone was going to love me, they would have to love all of me, heels, career and all. And now, knowing that I'm aromantic, well, I'm not sure how those things play into my life. Anyway, I just wanted to share my thoughts and see if anyone else had similar feelings.
  6. 11 points
    My teacher's words after explaining that aromanticism is a lot like being straight, except everyone's your gender: "So it's like being a straight boy in a room full of straight boys."
  7. 10 points
    i had a psychiatric assessment yesterday (recently had a bit of a mental health crisis, not important), so there was a social worker who did most of the talking, a psychiatrist whose purpose was supposedly just to prescribe me an appropriate medication, and a recent grad who was just observing. anyway, at one point they asked my sexual orientation and whether i was in a relationship, so i told them, and they had a lot of questions and comments. i had to explain aromanticism and how it's different from asexuality. they asked whether i'd ever been in a relationship so i tried to sum up in a minute what a bad experience it was (just because i'm aro; he was great) and added that "i haven't been in a sexual relationship because then it would have to be sexual and romantic and i...can't do that. but i also don't want to just like...ugh, it's complicated." at this point the psychiatrist interjected by saying that a sexual and romantic relationship is an important part of life and basically implied that it would lessen my depression, when i'd just explained how the opposite was true. i said "i would have to disagree. i'm quite happy with my life the way it is." he said "ok" but was clearly not satisfied. i also found it interesting that despite my having expressed a mild interest in making more friends (but i couldn't be bothered), they did not agree that that would improve my life. i wonder whether they would have made such a big deal about me being single if i weren't aro, like if i just didn't happen to be dating at the moment. i told my dad afterwards and he was surprised and disappointed that they reacted like that; i was disappointed but not surprised. i told him "everyone says that. i'm used to it." (most of the mental health professionals i've seen, i mean, but obviously people in general too.) he said "that's like telling an asexual: 'go have some sex.'" i informed him that people do suggest that, and reflected that "if i'd been asexual, he (the psychiatrist) would have had a wig-out." i added that my aromanticism is "always my least favourite thing to bring up (to health care professionals). they're like, 'so, are you in a relationship?' and i'm like, 'oh, here we go.'" so yeah. i'll be doing a few therapy sessions with the social worker; i hope she'll let me talk about my depression instead of my aromanticism. 🙃
  8. 10 points
    From this "self help" book I'm reading. I thought other aro's might enjoy it.
  9. 10 points
    Don't forget that this could happen to allo too. Or for instance a straight person having a crush on a gay person, and vice versa. And you are not responsible for how you feel. There is something wrong with no one, and certainly not with you. People should understand that losing a friend is important too, and that you could feel hurt or depressed for that too. People value so much romantic relationship that they forget that there are other things in the world they can value. Am I the only one who never get the "we can't date so don't be friends?". I mean, ok you didn't want to date, but it don't invalidate that fact that you get along and have things in common. So why reject the friedship just because you can't have the romantic love?
  10. 10 points
    I can help with that. Actually, just a couple hours ago in my public speaking class I made a persuasive speech about why amatonormativity as a claim about how everyone should live is invalid. My teacher and multiple classmates told me I did really well so I think I'm going to try to start making more speeches about that in more public settings.
  11. 10 points
    YMBAI you are on this website and reading all (or some) of these things and nodding your head or smiling because you relate.
  12. 10 points
    Assumed you were straight, and then realized you felt nothing towards any gender.
  13. 10 points
    Dated someone because you felt like you were supposed to.
  14. 9 points
    Somewhat of a sad rant coming up. Trigger warning for some self-deprecating language as a result of other people reacting to me being aro. Foreword, I love being aro, and I'm happy to finally know what I am. But dealing with people's reaction to it is still a struggle. (First post here, please let me know if venting posts like this need to go elsewhere or should be taken down!) What being aro feels like for me right now: Forever friend zoning people and having that feeling that all the things they've done for you up til that point that you thought was done willingly actually came at a price you didn't know you had to pay. And then once they reach a breaking point because you haven't returned the same amount of gesture, even if you've been vulnerable and supportive and is otherwise a good friend, suddenly all the things they do for you is revoked even though you were under the impression that you were reciprocating via friendship. Suddenly you're Insensitive. Even though all the criteria has been the same from your end, and you thought the friendship was mutual. And then losing a friend even though you were just.... Making a friend. And that creeping thought that they only did those things because they were romantically interested, which in my head has zero value, which makes me feel like I'm not worth being nice to unless I am being romanced, which I don't place any value in. And when I complain about getting too much romantic attention I get told I'm not appreciating people liking me. Even though people liking me has always only ended up with me hurt and losing a friend. Even though people liking me romantically has always only meant that my existence alone caused people pain. And then no one understands why you're going through just as much pain as they are. Because their heartbreak is romantic and therefore will always, ALWAYS, be prioritized over any other heartache. Even the allies instinctively do not question that of course the alloromantic is suffering more. Further confirming that being aro just means I'm broken because I think my friendship heartbreak is just as painful as someone's romance heartbreak. TL;DR for some reason I attract a lot of romantic attention and contrary to popular opinion it makes me feel worthless.
  15. 9 points
    I mean, don't see how it's any different from any other orientation label. Should one refrain from calling themselves gay in case it rules out the possibility of ever being attracted to the "opposite" gender? The fact is, the reason so many people tell aspecs such a thing, and why so many believe it, is because of amatonormativity. You can worry about future "what ifs" all you want, but I refuse to disallow myself the freedom of having a way to describe my experiences just because some fuckos are more concerned with the possibility that I might someday become "normal".
  16. 9 points
    I totally love this - It only came out earlier this month!
  17. 9 points
    When you thought all this time your standards were just incredibly high 🙄
  18. 9 points
    YMBAI you are annoyed that straight people of the opposite sex don't want to accept being "just" friends.
  19. 9 points
    YMBAI you get upset when a book, movie, or tv show ruins a perfectly good friendship by turning it romantic unnecessarily. YMBAI you can't flirt to save your life.
  20. 9 points
    You might be aromantic if when you think about marriage you don't imagen who you will get married to, but other things instead e.g. getting to wear nice clothes, how nice the food will be, having the opportunity for a big family get together You might be aromantic if when people look down on marrying for visas, marrying for tax breaks, etc. you wonder why they do because those sound like very practical reasons to get married
  21. 9 points
    You might be aro if you mistook sexual, aesthetic or sensual attraction for a crush. You might be aro if you thought romantic feelings described by others must be exaggerated. You might be aro if you never notice when someone has a crush on you, unless someone points it out to you. You might be aro if you broke somebody's heart by accident, even without realizing it, simply because you underestimated the intensity of their feelings. You might be aro if you felt suffocated and overwhelmed in a romantic relationship. You might be aro if the pet names people gave to their partners, always felt artificial and ridiculous to you.
  22. 9 points
    You might be aro if you don't understand the point of romantic relationships.
  23. 8 points
    I did a poll some while ago about the gender distribution here on the forum. Apparently, there are twice as many females here than males. This result was also reproduced by a study I saw on tumblr some while ago. Since then I've been wondering if this is something which inherent to aromanticism or if it is just a sampling bias. Right now, my theory is that it is a sampling bias caused by women talking more often about love with their friends. If this is true, it might lead to an increased psychological strain because of not being able to contribute anything to the conversation and just realizing more easily that something is "off", resulting in a higher proportion of women actually investigating about aromanticism. But I don't have any experience with this. I can just say for myself that I personally basically never talk about love with my friends (but this could also just be because all of my friends are nerds) and only looked into aromanticism because of curiosity as I didn't think it would matter much if I was aromantic.
  24. 8 points
    So I had heard about the discrimination that happens in the LGBT+ community. However since I hadn't been identifying as Aro for long, I hadn't experienced this discrimination from anyone, let alone from someone in the community at all yet. Sadly, I just had a run in with this first hand a few weeks ago for the first time. I was talking with my German friend over the phone and he asked me to tell him about something new in my life. I was struggling to tell him something so random so he asked me about my love life. I hadn't really told many people of my Aromanticism, and he's not someone you can take seriously so I told him jokingly that "I don't have a love life". Then when he said that surely there must be someone, I decided to say the "A" word. I said "I'm Aromantic"...He was Bisexual so I thought he would be accepting but then he said " I don't believe you" and that shocked me. I had never experienced this so I didn't know how to respond. All I could say was "Why?". I tried to play it off as he told me things like that I should try dating, or as he asked me if there really is nobody that I would date, or as he suggested I was just socially awkward and not Aromantic but on the inside it was starting to hurt. It hurt even more after the conversation ended. As I reflected on the conversation I realized he had tried to "fix" me. He tried to get me to date. He tried to make me something I'm not, and it was a member of the LGBT+ community that did this! (The only good thing I got out of that is now I'm starting to think I might be asexual too, not heterosexual like I previously thought. but what a way to find that out...definitely not how I'd prefer to) Now that I've experienced this, it is clear that this is a real problem. People think we don't exist. People think there's something wrong with us just as my friend suggested it was my social awkwardness that was the problem (though other worse informed people will suggest things like actual mental illness). And even worse, we are overshadowed in our own community and that has lead even our own peers to believing that we don't exist. I began noticing things I would overlook like how, and I'm sure you guys don't do that here, but when I look through the aromantic hashtag in instagram I'll see posts that deal with asexuality only. There's not a single mention of aromantics except in the hashtag! It's a bit of a pain having to scroll past those nonaromantic posts especially for people who aren't even asexual. It's also hard when some (not all!) alloromantic asexuals will throw aromantics under the bus to be accepted as well by saying things along the line of "Look! I have a partner. I experience love too! There's just no sex involved." Now I know not all Alloromantic Asexuals do this but some do and this is definitely damaging to the Aromantic community. I'm just beginning to notice how different we are from the rest of the LGBT+ community. We are separated from them by a common bond a lot of them share: love. And it's not just a small part of the asexual community that will do it, parts of the LGBT community will do it unknowingly when they argue their case saying that "it's just love." This helps them, but when they've been accepted by others, the aromantic community won't be accepted because those same arguments will be used against us. It hurts us in the long run. Yeah I'm sorry this post is very all over the place! I'm kind of having a crisis. It's just, as other parts of the LGBT community are starting to be accepted, aromantics are struggling to get any recognition at all. We're growing slowly but I'd love to see more progress. But how? How can we make people see us and understand us? After this incident I feel like I'll be more hesitant in the future to come out to, well, anyone!
  25. 8 points
    That's something the aro community, and especially us allo aros, have been fighting against for a long time. I'm sorry you had to find out about it this way.
  26. 8 points
    Nice to see some allos are catching on.
  27. 8 points
    There's something like this on AVEN, but I haven't seen it here (although I admittedly didn't look too hard). The idea is to get people talking to each other. So if anyone wans more private conversation to make friends, comment on here, and pm someone that you've never pm-ed before. And maybe tell some things that you're interested in so people know what to chat about.
  28. 8 points
    I'm doing a project for my sociology class on how the focus on romance and lack of awareness in our society affects aromantic people. I need as many responses as I can get, so please feel free to share this with your aro friends after you take it! Here's the survey: https://goo.gl/forms/ltqySLHtbm6iaYuI3 if you have any additional feedback for me, feel free to respond to this post below!
  29. 8 points
    I recently heard a quote from the famous feminist, Gloria Steinem. When asked why she wasn't married, she responded with this gem. "I don't mate in captivity." It's now my favorite sentence in the English language because of how elegantly it sums up my aromantic experience. I'd like to hear if anyone else in the community knows some nice and simple ways of communicating that kind of aro pride with such concision. After all, we could all use a more efficient and well-tuned way to explain aromanticism. I look forward to reading some other examples.
  30. 8 points
    My school's library just put up a valentine's day display. I was really surprised (in a good way!) by what was on it. It was talking about the different kinds of loves, and how romantic love is not the only one! I was so excited to see it acknowledge this, instead of continuing to push an amatonormative message.
  31. 8 points
    I’ve noticed that the color green seems really appealing to me now lol. I wonder if it’s a subconscious thing because I’ve finally accepted my aro-ness.
  32. 8 points
    I feel like a core part of my aromantic identity is that I'm very affectionate, I want lots of affection in all my close relationships, and the way I experience affection is fundamentally different from allos. My desire for affection in general and affection within my established relationships is a core part of my identity. A lot of the affection I enjoy is culturally coded as romantic, but I experience intimate affection as neither romantic nor platonic. My friendships that don't feature hugging, kissing, cuddling, and other kinds of intimacy feel "incomplete" to me, and the boundaries that allos set between romance and platonic friendship seem bizarre and arbitrary to me. My affinity for affection also sets me apart in some ways from other aros who are disinterested in affection, so that we have very different experiences of being aromantic, but I still feel far more kinship with them than I do with allos, even affectionate allos. I'd like to coin a term for this since I've met several other aros who feel similarly. I started with the term "amorous aromantic" but folks in our Discord server pointed out that using "amorous" as an identity label conflicts with the established usage of "nonamorous" as a relationship model, and they mean different things. So, anyone have any ideas for words or roots that could mean "aromantic people who have a strong affinity for affection" as an identity label?
  33. 8 points
    Who else has read Becky Chambers wayfarer series? I think the author is really good at portraying different kinds of relationships and people relating to each other. The first book has a qpr (edit: I realize now I used that wrong, I meant a committed sexual but not romantic relationship) and in the third one off the pov is aro. The second book doesn't really have any specif aro themes but it does deal a lot with friendship and chosen family.
  34. 8 points
    One of the hardest parts of coming out is trying to put your experiences into words romantic people can understand. Everyone comes out in their own way, but I'd like to share some things that have and have not worked for me. "Aromantics don't experience romantic attraction, ie. they don't get crushes, they don't fall in love, that sort of thing." ---> Response: "That sounds like a psychopath!" ...It turned out she confused falling in love with loving in general. She was much more accepting once I set her straight. "I don't think I want a boyfriend." ---> Response from my admirer: "Oh, you're not looking for a boyfriend right now. That's okay." Some people mix up aromanticism with temporary singledom. Explaining why I identify as aromantic: "I was in a relationship where we were mostly friends, but he liked me as more than that, and so I tried to make it work that way. And he would do things like look at me all sweetly and romantically, and I just felt so uncomfortable. But it wasn't because I didn't like him." ---> Coworker: "You know that's normal, right?" Apparently romance repulsion sounds a lot like butterflies when you explain it out loud; I've found people are a lot more understanding when you emphasize the distinction. "I'm asexual, which means this. I'm also aromantic, which means this. They sort of go together for me, but not for everybody." ----> Response: "I don't think you need to box yourself up in labels like this." People are usually more accepting if you introduce the concept before the vocabulary. Explaining it to children: "Did you guys know some people never get a crush in their whole lives?" ---> Response: "What?! I didn't know that!" I like to use this "fun fact" as a way of introducing the concept to pretty much anyone. Depending on the response, I'll usually add, "Btw I'm one of those people." Wearing aromantic pride flair sometimes garners questions, at which point a mini-lesson on aromanticism is usually welcome. I've had several people thank me for introducing them to the topic for different reasons. Some people just won't get it, and that's okay. Some people won't have any idea how to respond, and so they'll change the subject. That's okay too. So long as you don't let these people's views on aromanticism drag you down. You're not crazy and you're not the only one. But you know that already because you're here. ☺️
  35. 8 points
  36. 8 points
    Whew, you may not realize it, but you've stumbled into a hot topic. I haven't seen it discussed much on this forum, but I have seen it discussed on Tumblr. If I find any particularly relevant blog posts, I'll share them here. The short answer is no, you're not being over-sensitive. And yes, there are people who criticize us as a "lesser" or "less oppressed" orientation and ask us to speak less so that "more important" queer people can speak more. Those people are wrong and their attempts to silence us are a kind of anti-queer oppression, coming from queer people who should be supporting us. We call them exclusionists, because they want to exclude anyone who doesn't fit their narrow definitions of queer from queer communities. They also usually say "queer is a slur so don't say it" which is also wrong. Aromantic people belong in queer communities just as much as anyone else, and we deserve the support of queer communities just as much as anyone else. Aromantic is a queer identity. Regarding how your friends responded to you, yes, a lot of us have experienced that kind of thing. People who love us don't understand what aromantic is, so they just say nothing. No support, no criticism, no excitement, no questions, just nothing at all. It happens quite a lot. It's very frustrating. But it doesn't necessarily mean that they don't want to support you. You might need to have some more conversations about your experience of being aromantic, or maybe even outline ways they could show support for you. Maybe send them articles or blog posts that you might find particularly relevant. It sucks that we sometimes have to train our friends how to be good allies, but sometimes they really are willing to learn. Also, plenty of people can probably relate to your story. I know I can. I eventually left a friend group I'd been a part of for 10 years because of their utter silence regarding my identity when I came out as nonbinary. A lot of aro blogs on Tumblr frequently talk about how little support we get from other queer communities, so you can find plenty of solidarity there if that's what you want. We're here for you, and there are plenty of people here who will share your excitement about discovering your identity. Hopefully your friends will come around, too.
  37. 8 points
    Some of my thoughts: Legal contracts of friendship Marriage comes with a lot of legal benefits and protection. I'm not gonna list it all because I'm sure it varies a lot from country to country (for example in the US a spouse has much more rights and obligations after a divorce than they do in Sweden). If a pair of friends were allowed similar rights it would be a protection for people who value strong friendship over romantic relationships. There could also be other types of rights for friendships, like the right to take time of work to care for a sick friend or for close friends to be considered immediate family in different situations. More inclusive child care Many people experience a drop in friendship after having children. The time and energy to take care of a newborn or toddler leaves little energy for other things. There are also societal expectations that parents (women especially) should put the needs of their child above everything else. But what if we could enlarge the view of caretakers to include more people? Maybe everyone could be allowed a few days a year of parental leave for friends. So if your best friend had a baby you could take some time to help them and bond with the child yourself. Also friends should be allowed to take sick leave for each others children. If someone has a really important day at work in their kid is sick a friend could step in and take a day of to help them out. To widen the circle of people seen as care taker of a child would lessen the burden on the parents and create stronger emotional bonds between friends. This could also help promote gender equality by taking pressure of women to always prioritize their child, and women are more often single parents which would benefit even more from extra help. I've focused primarily on legal aspects but of course there's tons of cultural aspects that could matter too. Like friendships being given more room in media. In what way do you think society could be improved to better accommodate strong and lasting friendships?
  38. 8 points
    I would be sorta tempted to try a pill that made me (temporarily) ace! Provided it was side-effect free. Sex drive and/or thinking/fantasizing about sex can be a nuisance and a distraction! Particularly when you're disinclined to jump through the typical romantic 'hoops' you see many people acting on their sex drives jump through (so, be careful what you wish for @Holmbo - it's not for no reason that 'sexual' and 'frustration' are often combined! ). But I probably still wouldn't take such a pill. I don't like the idea of a quick fix that leaves an underlying issue unresolved; in this case, how I deal constructively with having particular (strong) 'urges'. By simply removing a personal challenge, you also remove the opportunity to learn from it. Then, if I come across strong urges in another context (one where there isn't a pill for it!), I might no longer have the skills necessary for dealing with it.
  39. 8 points
    YMBAI You though it was awesome that a friend had an FWB then they decided to be in a romantic relationship, with the same partner, and it felt anti-climatic. YMBAI You just don't get all the congratulatory messages on social media when someone announces they are "in a relationship", "engaged" or "married".
  40. 8 points
    Before I knew I was aro, my "crushes" would take up a lot of my mental capacity because I did not have the language to describe my end goal. I knew I was drawn to a particular person, but the thought of doing anything romantic or sexual (I'm aroace) with them just did not compute. So my crushes actually gave me a lot of anxiety because I had no idea what I was feeling. But something clicked when I discovered the word "squish." Some aros and aces do not prefer the term, but for me it really helps communicate an intense platonic attraction and admiration that is similar yet fundamentally different from a crush. Similarities (based on how I have heard people describe crushes): My squish becomes kind of a hobby. I fangirl over them. I admire them aesthetically. I am curious about their thoughts. I wish to be around them. I care about what they think of me. I feel a general sense of happiness that they exist in the world. I like to bask in their presence. Differences: Dating? Sex? No thanks. I would just like to be close friends. I am not jealous when they date other people - I just would like to make sure I can still spend time with them. Now that I think about it, my squishes resemble celebrity crushes without the romantic and sexual attraction lmaooo. Or they make me feel the same excitement I experience when I see a cute dog. I think that is also why I like the term "squish" bc I just want to squish them because they make me happy! It can also feel like admiring a painting that you find beautiful, and that resonates with you for some reason. As for describing squishes to non-aces and aros, I usually begin my describing the ways my squishes are similar to crushes. It helps when you start with an experience they understand. Then I get into what makes a squish different. Metaphors (like celebrity crushes, cute animals, and paintings lol) can also work well.
  41. 8 points
    YMBAI you pushed friends away once they started to show romantic interest because it left you with a feeling of wrongness to be liked. YMBAI you would get mad/uncomfortable when someone teased you about a friend/squish because clearly you can't just want to be friends YMBAI you feel like a bucket of cold water is thrown on your head when someone confesses feelings for you
  42. 8 points
    i found a good one today, lads. so i'd read rick riordan's 'heroes of olympus' series and thought it would be awesome if there were an aro child of aphrodite but i hadn't considered piper, 'cause, you know, jason. then they show up in 'the trials of apollo' series ('the burning maze' spoilers ahead) and they've broken up and these lines of dialogue had me like 👀: piper: jason's great. he's my closest friend, even more than annabeth. but whatever i thought was there, my happily-ever-after...it just wasn't. apollo: your relationship was born in crisis. such romances are difficult to sustain once the crisis is over. piper: it wasn't just that. apollo: *anecdote about an ex* piper: it was me. apollo: what do you mean it was you? you mean you realized you didn't love jason? that's no one's fault. narration: she grimaced, as if i (apollo) still hadn't grasped what she meant...or perhaps she wan't sure herself. piper: i know it's nobody's fault. i do love him. but...like i told you, hera forced us together--the marriage goddess, arranging a happy couple. my memories of starting to date jason, our first few months together, were a total illusion. then, as soon as i found that out, before i could even process what it meant, aphrodite claimed me. my mom, the goddess of love. aphrodite pushed me into thinking i was...that i needed to...look at me, the great charmspeaker (she has the power to bend people to her will with her words). i don't even have words. aphrodite expects her daughters to wrap men around our little fingers, break their hearts, et cetera. apollo: yes. your mother has definite ideas about how romance should be. piper: so if you take that away, the goddess of marriage pushing me to settle down with a nice boy, the goddess of love pushing me to be the perfect romantic lady or whatever-- apollo: you're wondering who you are without all that pressure. ohhh man. it's perfect. and rick's sooo great with representation that...i mean, not getting my hopes up, but how awesome would a canon aro piper be? anyway, that's one of my favourite headcanons of all time.
  43. 8 points
    Yeah, my allo friends think my relationship advice is amazing. But the secret is that every bit of advice I give them would work exactly the same in any other encounter, whether it's a friendship, a family relationship, or ordering your coffee at Starbucks. My advice is just "how to communicate with other humans 101". But the allos don't know that, and it blows their minds every time. Shh! Don't let them know our secret that we actually don't know shit about romance!
  44. 8 points
    A few months ago, in class, the teacher was doing statistics and told us that 86% of students at the end of high school fell in love at least once. My friend said : "It means 14% never fell in love? That's too sad". And in my head, I was screaming : "14%? I KNEW THEY WERE MORE OF US!".
  45. 8 points
    YMBAI you’re perfectly content being single the rest of your life
  46. 8 points
    YMBAI when people around you talk about what crushes feel like and to you it sounds like a serious medical condition.
  47. 8 points
    YMBAI you found kiss scenes in the middle of action completely stupid. Like, why are you kissing right now when zombies are about to kill you?
  48. 8 points
    You might be aro if you don't understand how most people seem to have crushes all the time... Or if you thought you were just picky when it came to crushes..
  49. 8 points
    me: *is happy* all of my family: "so who's the lucky lady?" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
  50. 7 points
    That sounds an awful lot like internalised arophobia to be honest, though that's just my personal opinion. I think a lot of us daydreamed of weddings and significant others, though not necessarily at a maladaptive level, which I imagine complicates things. It can be very hard to accept that you won't have the future you expected, and for me personally it was difficult to reconcile my desire for a relationship with the fact that in reality relationships are not good for me. That said you could still be cupioromantic, I'm not you so I can't decide for you. And it wouldn't be wrong to keep identifying that way to convey the loss you feel. Whatever happens, good luck.
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