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  1. Today
  2. The Attraction of Crime Fiction

    There are a certain type of crime book that have romance throughout, the sort of (generally female) amateur sleuth are generally the worst for that. Those sorts of books though are sort of a thriller version of a Barbara Cartland, even if the whodunnit has a twist the rest of the storylines become predictable. Romance in books generally bugs me only when it is going well, so if the side story is about investigators having relationship problems I generally don't really see it as romance per se, more like any serious issues BFFs or non-loving people with shared children might have. They are relationship woes but most of what I have read recently would be a far stretch to call romance. I'll have to remember about the children's perspective books. I know I have a few in my library. I think I must have read some that were bordering on Young Adult as I remember there were all sorts of romance themed side plots about the parent's or older sibling's relationships.
  3. Famous Name Game

    D: I have to find someone with the initials Y.W. now? that is evil Yu Wang
  4. Swearing Poll (WARNING: Swearing and Course Language) NSFW

    If you were wondering, the swear I was told off for using was 'Pissing Biscuits' as an exclamation. Which makes me a Strange and Unusual, Abstract Verbal Painter, Conjoining -Ing, Anatomist, Always in Vain, Teacher (Level 2) I don't swear much but pretty much every time I do it is a Conjoining -Ing or Strange and Unusual (or kid safe when kids are present.)
  5. I was recently told (quite rudely) that I should use 'common swears' when swearing. I live around a fair number of teachers so technically the most common swear I hear is 'sugar'. I am wondering what is common amongst the users as a bit of fun, and if you have anything weird in your vocabulary. I am sort of hoping people laugh at this. Yet it helps us get to know a tiny bit about what sort of people are in this community These are not insults, but rather stubbed-toe type exclamations I am looking for. This is all for a bit of fun, and I read the TOS and it didn't mention 'appropriate site vocabulary' beyond banning derogatory/discrimination terms and member direct insults, so don't do those here! (even if you do select option 12 on the first question, keep it to yourself) Feel free to comment, maybe to share, maybe to explain why you chose 'Other', maybe to laugh at my category system or even maybe to tell me how terrible this is and how it doesn't add anything to the community.
  6. Religious fundamentalism

    The kids will probably be fine, they will feel confused and left out in science class when it comes up, especially if they speak up. They will also probably fail all the tests associated with the solar system, so maybe they will have to choose between grades and inflexable beliefs. Hopefully whatever school they go to has an effective anti-bullying system if they do get targeted if they do speak out. If that sort of thing happens and you still have contact with the family I guess reassuring them that the targeting is not because they are Muslim, but because they are ignoring science, which is a highly regarded collection of information in ALL western countries. I'm fairly sure most religions (Christianity, Judaism, Chinese folk religion/Taoism, the ancient Indo-European Religions such as the Roman and Greek Pantheons, Ancient Egyptian, Hinduism) had Earth as a fixed presence with the sum moving above. Really I even think the celebrated Islamic scientists of the 13th century, or before then, had the planetary orbits around the sun worked out, far before the Mediterranean and European cultures stopped punishing people for saying it. I don't know how you could help them see it differently. They would have to want to scientifically educate themselves. Change cannot be forced upon the religious, they get even more steadfast if they feel their beliefs are being undermined. I guess the main point is that, to them, their beliefs are their knowledge, they know this stuff to be true. They may understand differently in the future, but for now maybe tell them that their knowledge is different from your, and the majority population of Sweden, knowledge. And your reaction, however inadequate or bad you think your reaction was, it is probably the standard reaction they will get from other Swedish people on this topic. If the family is accepting (or at least tolerant) of different religions having a differing viewpoint shouldn't really be an issue between you as long as they understand that their view is not common (or even particularly tolerated) where they are now.
  7. Yesterday
  8. Most aromantic movie?

    A Forbes-style statistical analysis (by which the gender wage gap is practically zero) rests on the assumption that, basically, if it's not approaching a situation where a legal case because of employment discrimination could be mounted against the company, it's definitely caused by women's free choices or inherent qualities. If women don't get promoted it must be because they don't want to, preferring the less stressful job or they just aren't that good. It is obviously very questionable to place the burden of proof that high. But on the other hand… If we don't define “(un)explained gap” sanely and robustly, we get reports like from World Economic Forum1 which force us to conclude that employers in Qatar2 and the United Arab Emirates3 are at the forefront of female empowerment on this issue. Yeah, nothing against Qataris or UAE citizens, but that's simply not very plausible, too. Ok, let's leave it at that, I'm not going to open a thread about this. It wouldn't end well. 1 see here, pages 68, 278, 330. Point “Wage equality for similar work” 2 here women get jailed for giving birth to an illegitimate child 3 and here rape victims are routinely jailed for extramarital sex – but the UAE have the second best score worldwide for gender wage equality
  9. Famous Name Game

    William Yeats
  10. Last week
  11. The asexual food porn thread

    @Ace of Amethysts it is a 'Sushi Burger' I don't know if they are made commercially but I think it would be fun to try one
  12. Nanowrimo

    Thank you, I shall need plenty of both!
  13. The asexual food porn thread

    @Apathetic Echidna What is that?
  14. Famous Name Game

    Sarah Wynter
  15. The asexual food porn thread

  16. You might be aro if...

    YMBAI you cannot, due to lack of motivation or finesse, write romance in a story setting.
  17. Nanowrimo

    I wish you both luck and inspiration!
  18. Forming Intimate Friendships

    Good point with that. My comment before did seem very 'other people only', but we do change as well as we are those 'other people' to basically everyone else. Maybe this is the key. Everyone has bad experiences and becomes somewhat jaded. All the other people are (also) too tired to bother anymore, which is why they get picky about what they want in a friend, weeding out the things in friends they had issues with in the past. I still feel some of the intimacy that drops off when they get a romantic partner is based in the feelings that the partner should now receive these intimacies exclusively, otherwise it is 'cheating'. Is this amatonormativity raising it's head again or are they just examples of controlling people making a relationship bad? The relationships I know this from never lasted more than about 18 months so now I generally see the withdrawing of intimacy with friends as the sign of a doomed relationship. Though when the romantic partners move in together and the couple become a 'single unit', with the other person always there, some things get much harder to do.
  19. Most aromantic movie?

    yeah, there are a few issues with the system, but it mostly works well and the issues seem possibly impossible to fix. is this like seniority in position? or is it a sketchy sort of 'there are no women CEOs so there is no wage gap'? I just threw the 10% in as a general number as there is a range. I like looking at the issue on the smaller scale rather than an overall outlook because that is where the discrepancies shine, not only between genders but also between job types in the same companies. There are plenty of jobs where there is no unexplained gap, but there are others where it seems very bad. Not even mentioning the bonuses system which I have many thoughts about and the work claims some people get away with ~I think I just know the dodgy dealings of a bad company. Anyway we should take this to another topic or something as it certainly is not related to movies anymore.
  20. Nanowrimo

    I've written just over 32K words, but I'm running out of story! This often happens - my writing can be pretty spare, and I'm always rushing ahead to get to the good bits. Luckily, I've got some ideas for things to add if I get to the end of the story before the end of the month.
  21. Hi everyone!

    Welcome the land of accepting confusion as the first step towards finding comfort.
  22. zootopia

    I liked that movie very much, just stay away from some the furries if you want them to remain just friends . But yeah, good message about prejudice and how murky the whole thing is.
  23. Forming Intimate Friendships

    Often without realising how hurtful this can be to aros. With it being likely that mutual friends will be "cheerleading" their new romantic relationship. Whilst seeing the ending of "just a (weird) friendship" as inconsequential. Easier said than done. People who want romantic relationships or purely platonic are quite obvious. With huge industries to help anyone looking for either of these two things. It's far from obvious where to even look for people even vaguely interested in anything else.
  24. Custom Pride Flags

    Neither do I @Holmbo
  25. The asexual food porn thread

  26. Post something totally random

  27. Nanowrimo

    It started off with me polishing off some one-shots I had outlined sometime beforehand. Then after a week I was deleting more words than I wrote. Then I realized I was actually just writing embarrassing memories of mine. And now it's devolved into just journaling. ...so pretty o.k., more or less.
  28. Most aromantic movie?

    Sorry! Please excuse my laziness. The board does make that quite cumbersome, you have to hack the html code to quote a non-user. IMHO those two issues (if we understand “equal representation” broadly) are still tightly connected, or at least they must be if you get at all serious about it. Otherwise somebody just comes along saying “I refute you thus” where ‘thus’ is a link to a Forbes article. There is the very important question if and how to define the unexplained portion of the gap; if you define it à la Forbes (where they cite the most skeptical studies), that is, for example, also including career position as an explanation, the unexplained gap is practically non-existent. If you only take type of occupation, type of industry, work hours, educational level as explanations, you get to over 10% (yet still with no unexplained wage gap at lower paid jobs and the highest unexplained gap at the highest pay levels – this fact is usually completely overlooked in the discussion).
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