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  2. I have ADHD and I suspect I'm somewhere on or near the autism spectrum. I think this intersects with aromanticism. There's just so much I don't get about neurotypical people! I think my neurodivergence makes me a bit more analytical and a bit of an outsider.
  3. Yeah. I also find parties and such pretty exhausting but every now and then I can find the energy for them! I guess for me it's been a matter of just finding a few cool people who in turn have introduced me to more cool people, etc. And it's taken a really long time!
  4. You may occasionally hear the 'late bloomer' narrative, and it's probably fair to assume that some people start feeling attraction or gaining interest in things later. However, there's absolutely no reason to assume that has to be the case! What you are describing sounds like textbook aromantic to me. I would caution in general, though, be aware that labels like 'aromantic' are tools! If there comes a time where you're not sure if it fits you anymore, it's totally fine to recontextualize your experiences and identify as something else instead. It happens to folks all the time, that one word fits them for a while and then they find that something else fits better. It's much healthier to be open to changing the word for your experiences as needed, then to lean too hard into a label and think that anything you experience forever must fit under that word. But with that in mind, I wouldn't see an issue with using the term aromantic at any age, if it suits you- and it sounds like it does.
  5. I have problems with anxiety and depression. I suspect I may have ADHD, but I could never tell my parents that to actually get any kind of treatment or even an evaluation.
  6. @Red Ivy I do! I have 11 alters -Omari
  7. Hello! My name is Omari I am the host. The host of a Multiple Personilty Disorder (MPD) System. My system is made up of 11 alters including me. We have; Daniel (protector) (19) Ash (emotional protector) (15) Delaney (physical protector) (17) Ian (little) (5-9) * Kugo (little) (4-7) * Eli (gatekeeper) (17-20) * Jamie (internal self helper) (15) Taylor (locked alter) (12) Eric (persecutor) (17) Hailey (persecutor) (16) And me, Omari (host) (16) * -> they are age sliders We are 11 people that share a single body This is us Nice to meet you -The Crew
  8. I don't really know where that would be! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I'm also a pretty hardcore introvert; I tend to find social interaction with lots of new people drains my energy very quickly and I get easily over-stimulated (I don't think I would cope well with something like a pride parade )
  9. Thanks for your replies! I feel welcome. Uhhh it's been a long road, but: I have two lovers at the moment. One of them I got to know through friends. I have a friend that I just got to know through work, this guy who clocked that I was also queer and polyamorous (I don't know if that's a term I'd use for myself any more because I'm not... amorous. But polyam circles are good for finding varying intensities of relationships, because there's not the expectation that everyone will automatically board the relationship escalator of falling in love - dating - getting engaged - moving in together - getting married) and he invited me to a big party. There I met this lady who is married to the love of her life but open to playing with other people (with the husband's full knowledge and consent of course). We ended up flirting a little and she asked if I wanted to play (bdsm circles: also good for casual play partners). And then I waited AN ENTIRE YEAR because I wasn't ready, but then we talked again and met up and it's super nice, we get along like a house on fire and we've been meeting once a month or two for a year now. She's said she's infatuated with me, I've said I don't really feel that way, maybe not for anyone ever, and we're both cool with each other's feelings (or lack thereof). The other lover I just met this summer at Pride. I went on Pride picnic with some queer & trans friends (queer / trans / gender non-conforming people: also often cool with non-normative relationships, but your info says you're straight so this is maybe not applicable to you). I liked him, I asked him out (I am super brave, this was NOT easy but I've tried to learn to voice my desires more clearly lately and asking never hurts if you do it nicely), we've played together once now, it was super nice and we're planning another date. (Both of these people live in another town than me, which also keeps the intensity down nicely.) He has a lot of casual play partners / one night stands, I don't know if he's looking for a love relationship but since we're explicitly nonmonogamous he's free to find that somewhere other than me and if he does it doesn't mean he has to dump me. I've tried online dating with mixed success, but I find it's better to just go out where likeminded, sexually openminded people hang out and meet them, that's a faster way to see if you'll connect with someone.
  10. I've been in three long term relationships. I haven't hated it. There's a lot about a relationship I like: I like sex with someone I know well enough to explore a lot of different fantasies, I like emotional intimacy, I like having a friend who is very close to me and knows about all my stuff. And all of my relationships have been pretty unconventional, very chill and based on friendship and in the case of the last two, non-monogamous. And there hasn't been a lot of... flowers or moonlight walks or any of the more overtly romantic stuff. Two of my first longer relationships I just ended when I felt they'd run their course. It sounds kinda terrible but I felt like I'd explored this person and seen what there is to see, and just didn't see the point in staying any longer. A bit like I'd visited a nice museum or something and it was good but now I was ready to go do something else? We weren't sexually super compatible with either of them, and my initial feelings of loving the feeling of being liked and wanted had faded. My last partner was a bit different, I felt like we just had a deep friendship and companionship and I was ready to spend the rest of my life with him. But ironically enough, he left me because he says his romantic feelings had faded away. I felt kinda very betrayed at that initially. I guess it was so different for me than for him, I kinda didn't get the whole romance thing in the first place but the companionship was still pretty good for me. But right now I'm exploring having friends with benefits or long-term lovers. I don't feel the need to get in another relationship really, at least not for now. Maybe with another aromantic person it would be nice to start some sort of a partnership, where both of us are on the same place that we like each other's company but don't feel the rush or butterflies or rollercoaster or whatever love is supposed to be. I'm done feeling like I'm not enough for a partner, like I'm cold and letting the other person down by not feeling enough.
  11. Neo: What are you trying to tell me? That I can dodge bullets romance? Morpheus: No, Neo. I'm trying to tell you that when you're ready, you won't have to. But on a more serious note: what did you actually do to establish these connections, if you don't mind answering? It seems to me like "the system" is broadly enabling of meaningless sexual connections in a non-romantic context, or meaningful sexual connections in a romantic context, but not much else - and I'm not a very good hacker at the moment!
  12. Hello! Some people have a more fluid sexuality than others,so it's a possibility. Hope you enjoy your stay here
  13. Hello everyone! I'm Emrys and I've recently realized I'm aromantic! It was after reading a definition about what a queerplatonic relation is and it clicked very well. I am unsure as to my sexuality, but I'm beginning to arrive at the same conclusion that I did with my gender. Maybe I keep switching between various labels because it's fluid. So I may be abrosexual??? I am genderfluid tho, I've got that nailed done (tho there are a few other gender labels I identify with). So other than that whole mess, I do actually have interests. I really love Imagine Dragons, Starset, and Disney music. I play video games, though I've been low on time lately so Minecraft has been my go-to. I'm currently a freshman in uni and majoring in computer science with a concentration (minor but more focused) in cyber gaming and simulation.
  14. You're not too young at all! I was about 14 when I realized that I was aromantic because, like you, I hated romance in television/books and couldn't understand why I didn't have "crushes" like my friends were describing them. I ignored this discovery and tried to convince myself that I wasn't aromantic for awhile. But now, I'm 19 and I realize that that's what I truly am. If you really have no urge to change the fact that you're not in a relationship, then don't. Your peace of mind and your thoughts on dating are a priority and you shouldn't change that just because you feel pressured to. There's nothing wrong with you for not experiencing the same desires as "everyone else" because there are plenty of aromantic people who feel the same way. For me, what helped with coming to terms with my own aromanticism, was going on youtube and watching other aromantic people sharing their stories. I realized that 1) I could relate to many of their stories and 2) that there were a lot more of us than I had previously thought. The road to self discovery can be difficult, but on arocalypse, there are plenty of people who can support you on your journey! Just know that your feelings are completely valid and that you deserve to live your life any way that you want to live it.
  15. i think i have a squish on a guy in my class.  i noticed him last year but we didn't really talk until now.

  16. Last week
  17. Adding to what was already said: Even if this was just because you're too young (which I don't think), there's no damage in identifying as aromantic. I've heard that you tend to notice if you've got a crush on somebody, so even if you are wrong you'll notice once it becomes relevant.
  18. I know this isn't exactly helpful, but you'll have to decide for yourself. I get something kind of like this sometimes, but the question mark next to my romantic orientation is there for a reason. And as always, aromanticism is a spectrum, it might just be that we experience romantic attraction sometimes with it being too weak to notice (or separate it from platonic/aesthetic attraction) it most of the time.
  19. So, I can pretty much such that I've never had a proper crush... Well, almost. There's this one "crush" I had when I was 14/15 that I'm still a bit confused about. So there was this girl in my Media class who I will call G. I remember always admiring how beautiful she was whenever I was around her, and maybe a couple times not around her too. I also remember wanting to talk to her and to connect with her in some way, she was nice. I was nervous around her, but maybe that's because she was so pretty, and I was a special needs kid at school like this girl was out of my league. I get nervous around girls. Come to think of it, I'm not sure if I ever thought about her that much...again I got over her quickly whenever this all stopped. Oh yeah, I never felt anything sexual, or that sensual for some reason (I guess my sexual attraction was still not there yet or something) I think there is definitely aesthetic attraction though, I'm thinking it's either a squish or a crush but I really don't know. I'm confused.
  20. I'm feeling a lot more confident in my aromanticism. I'm still not totally sure, but I think I'm ready to break up with my girlfriend... wish me luck! :aroicecream:

    1. aro_elise

      aro_elise

      good luck!  have you told her you're aro or are you going to?  telling my bf, and later, breaking up with him, were big steps for me and they made me so much happier.

  21. Stop Trampling Aromantic Music, People SHARK
  22. Dude absolutely I'll get something tysm
  23. You're not to young, for sure. I just turned 15 and I'm fairly confident in my aromanticism. Unfortunately, there's a bit of stigma even in the lgbt community about aromanticsm. But I think eventually if you come out to a couple friends at a time people will start to understand. Start out slow and let yourself think more about how your identity feels, and if this feels right to you then that's something to be proud of. Don't forget you can be whoever you want to and you don't have to change for anyone else. As long as it makes you happy, your identity is valid.
  24. Hi, welcome to the forum. I want u to know u can absolutely live a happy life without romance, there are so many other things that can drive happiness. Platonic love, sexual love (it's totally like hacking the system isn't it great), family love, love for a pet, love for a show or a book, love for your hobbies or your profession, anything else. If you start identifying as aro and realize you want a romantic relationship, that's amazing go for it. And if you start identifying as aro and realize it fits, congrats you've figured yourself out and you can be happy. Either way you can still live life to the fullest and find out what makes you happy.
  25. it's absolutely possible. i'm only 21 but i like my romance-free life so far and i know i want it to stay that way in the future as surely as i know anything. i look forward to everything i'll be able to do without a romantic partner or kids holding me back. haha yeah, pretty cool, right?
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